"Lot 6a" - Shaun Patrick/The Giff

Good film! This was a lot of fun to watch and kept my interest. Yes, the 'effect' was getting a little old, but like Jason said, once you tighten it up a bit, you'll be good to go.

Back to the effect, I think what bugged me was that it was used on shots OTHER then POV... If this was what it was like to be in his head, we should only see (and hear) the effected stuff in the POV shots. I'd love to see what it looked like edited this way.

Anywho... great concept, great film! Congrats to the cast & crew. I'm looking forward to your future films. Very strong entry.
 
this was a cool idea. liked that a lot. as others have said, maybe keep the effect to the pov and show all other looks as normal. it would be way creepier. and i kinda half expected the dizzy guy to begin laughing madly. he did a great job btw. cool sound effects too. and good use of one location- a parking lot. cool!
 
Cool short! I started feeling dizzy and disoriented, so great job of pulling me into the
world of the protagonist. I was a little confused at the end whether or not he was tripping from the blow on the head he received, or there really was an emergency going on, or whether or not he knocked out his friend, or if his friend had turned to a zombie. I would have liked a little more exposition, even if you were going to leave us guessing in the end. That said, when it first got started I was a little skeptical about a horror film with parking attendants during broad daylight BUT, I got into it & I really enjoyed this. I thought your work with the lens baby (unless that was post effects) turned out excellent.

GOOD STUFF!! :)
 
pretty good, I like how at the end it's unclear whether his friend was really trying to attack him or if he had just killed his friend for no good reason. had a good subtly creepy and disorienting vibe.
 
From the beginning, I wondered what type of situation was being set up. The film seems to rely on slight comic relief and slight editing/cinematographic gimmicks to get the viewer to the first big detail: radio broadcasts of crucial information. Then, AHA! A sort of take on the zombie genre! I think this was an interesting way to approach the genre and it kept the audience guessing. The end was a nice moment of mystery that leans a little more toward one of the two possible outcomes.

However, I did have some qualms with my viewing. Nothing detrimental, but a lot of things could have elevated this work.

I'll start with the cinematography. Seeing that this was shot in a 5d mk2, I was expecting some crisp, well-colored and well-rendered images. I've seen lots of amazing stuff come out of the camera and while this didn't look bad by any means, it did not tap the potential of the setup.
As far as the direction of the camera goes, the film was just too bouncy and too subjective from the perspective of the man with the head injury. It didn't excite the viewer and it didn't illicit a more chaotic atmosphere. The film could have benefited greatly from some wider shots set up to establish a more direct line of conflict between the injured man, the man who went in the woods, and the atmosphere itself. The camera can create such heart-stopping suspense even with the most simple, rhythmic cuts between longer shots, mediums, closes, etc. and by just drawing the audience in.

This might have been out of your ability on location, but some wides set up elsewhere to establish a bleak, foreboding tone of the local atmosphere would have been nice. With a few extras, it could even have developed a quicker understanding of the situation at hand. Because the film does fall into abstraction by questioning the protagonist's sanity. When you mix a question of sanity, a head injury, and a possible zombie apocalypse, you walk in thin ice (or a tight rope). I just feel like the film could have been more visually arresting if the camera wasn't bobbing around and constantly racking in and out of focus with barrel distortion, Deakinizer-like macro blurring, and odd, digital lens flares. The style just doesn't match up to the images and story. More simple construction would have helped hide the camera and suck the viewer in easier.

I know it seems like I just tore the film apart visually, but it really wasn't a bad viewing. Once the ball got rolling (bad pun, sorry), the film did take off and I enjoyed seeing where it went. The acting was serviceable, the audio had very few bumps and bruises (although some adr was present and some of the sound futzing from the radio wasn't quite accurate as far as perspective), and the premise was interesting. It just feels like it needs more development and a slightly less frenetic construction. Disorientation can work when the audience is brought back to a calm, telling conclusion. But here, it seemed to hinder the film.

These were my primary concerns about an otherwise interesting and at times compelling film. Nice job, overall! :thumbsup:
 
This was an interesting film in its approach. I don't think the disorientation was that bad as a viewer, however, I think it should have been changed up a little here and there, that way it doesn't seem like one LONG effect.

I thought the actors did a great job. Subject matter of the film is the kind of stuff I'm really into and I thought you did a nice job relating it.

Good job. Thanks for sharing!
 
ZazaCast said:
Back to the effect, I think what bugged me was that it was used on shots OTHER then POV... If this was what it was like to be in his head, we should only see (and hear) the effected stuff in the POV shots. I'd love to see what it looked like edited this way.
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Thank for the feedback, Zaza. We're definitely aware of the POV convention but we made the decision early to extend the effect beyond POV because it seemed very pedestrian that way. Personally, I believe, there are enough clean shots in the end to orient the audience to what's happening and I think the effects on the third person shots help to enforce the confusion that the main character is feeling.

Thanks for watching. Glad you enjoyed it.
 
Lawsuit_Boy said:
I'll start with the cinematography. Seeing that this was shot in a 5d mk2, I was expecting some crisp, well-colored and well-rendered images. I've seen lots of amazing stuff come out of the camera and while this didn't look bad by any means, it did not tap the potential of the setup.
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Thanks for the in depth feedback, Lawsuit_Boy. I'll only take issue with the quote above--should every film using the 5D Mark II look "crisp, well-colored, and well rendered"? Certainly on the technical level, the Mark 2 is capable of some pretty amazing stuff but isn't cinematography all about distinct looks? We shot on a drab, overcast day--which certainly plays into the feeling, tone of the whole film. Plus, in post the film was heavily color-corrected to highlight the orange of the reflective vests and cones. Certainly, your critique is a matter of taste but thinking certainly went into the overall look and style of the film.
 
killacam said:
pretty good, I like how at the end it's unclear whether his friend was really trying to attack him or if he had just killed his friend for no good reason. had a good subtly creepy and disorienting vibe.
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Exactly what we were going for killacam. Glad you enjoyed it--thanks for the feedback.
 
I watched it again by the way- great sound design. The visual effect is probably more obvious at first but the sound effects are very well done. also, you converted this to 24p right?
 
Thanks, killacam. Actually, it's in 30p. The Mark II doesn't shoot 24p yet (there's a firmware update on top for 2010) and we just decided to stay in 30p.
 
Shaun Patrick said:
Thanks for the in depth feedback, Lawsuit_Boy. I'll only take issue with the quote above--should every film using the 5D Mark II look "crisp, well-colored, and well rendered"? Certainly on the technical level, the Mark 2 is capable of some pretty amazing stuff but isn't cinematography all about distinct looks? We shot on a drab, overcast day--which certainly plays into the feeling, tone of the whole film. Plus, in post the film was heavily color-corrected to highlight the orange of the reflective vests and cones. Certainly, your critique is a matter of taste but thinking certainly went into the overall look and style of the film.
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The overcast certainly makes ANY shooter's job difficult.

I think my problem (after finally seeing still images) was from the compression. This isn't your fault as 50mb cuts down on the detail. I hope you don't think I was trying to insinuate that it looked really bad with that comment. I was just sort of comparing it in my own head with things I've seen fellows like Phil Bloom and http://vimeo.com/5410762 from Robin Risser.

So, once again, my problem was something obvious that has nothing to do with the way it was shot (compression). And while I agree, this portion is a subjective opinion about an aesthetic choice, I hold my stance. I think the film is really interesting and exciting enough, but if you were compelled, you could really add a lot to it. But, since most of the films in this fest won't really be touched up much more, this is purely hindsight. But hey, so are all critiques.
 
I took no offense from your initial comment--just defending our thinking about the look of the film. Also, based on the length of your response, I think there was definitely something in the film you responded too, so I definitely take (and value) the critique seriously. Personally, I think the lack of color (or drabness) adds to the tone of the film but we're not married to our color correction. We're definitely still tweaking and we'll experiment with some color correction options.

Again, thanks for taking the time to put together such a thoughful and thorough critique.

Best,

Shaun
 
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Shaun Patrick said:
I took no offense from your initial comment--just defending our thinking about the look of the film. Also, based on the length of your response, I think there was definitely something in the film you responded too, so I definitely take (and value) the critique seriously. Personally, I think the lack of color (or drabness) adds to the tone of the film but we're not married to our color correction. We're definitely still tweaking and we'll experiment with some color correction options.

Again, thanks for taking the time to put together such a thoughful and thorough critique.

Best,

Shaun
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No problem. I totally understand and completely agree that the overcast sky does help the film. A bright, sunny day just wouldn't sit well. I think the drabness works well, it's just that the compressed file softened the image and washed a little of the contrast and detail away. I'd love to view it in hd.

I just really wanted to make sure you knew I was picking on the cinematography, but just trying to offer another perspective. I gave a really positive review to Dispatch the other day and just noticed that a few people are tearing my review apart in the thread. I even mentioned that it had been a few days since I saw it so I might have missed things, which I did. I just feel like my reviews have been met with conflict so far. In Lossfest, I reviewed all 63 or 64 films outside of my own as deeply as I did yours, and the reactions were much different. Very odd.

Anyway, sorry for rambling. Once again, really cool take on the outbreak scenario.
 
Dude, no worries. I have a thick skin and totally appreciated the critique.

Yeah, the people ripping you apart on the Dispatch thread is BS. It's great to see someone take the time to give in depth critiques.
 
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Shaun Patrick said:
Dude, no worries. I have a thick skin and totally appreciated the critique.

Yeah, the people ripping you apart on the Dispatch thread is BS. Hudson just likes to hear himself argue about the axis of action. It's great to see someone take the time to give in depth critiques.
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That's what we're all here for, is the critiques. I got lots for my film Tiny Dancer in lossfest and am always willing to return the favor.

I rewatched Dispatch and saw that the axis problem I noted wasn't really a problem. I just needed a fresh viewing before writing the review. I don't understand the over-sensitivity and defense mechanisms floating about lately. *shrug*
 
Hmmm I just had a quick read and saw peoples thoughts on the effect. I found it disorientating and disturbing. In my mind it did what it was meant to.

Also I just read your synopsis. I had no idea these guys were parking attendants. I wondered, why are these guys playing ball in a carpark? Although I thought it played out fairly well from there. The other thing that mildly bothered me was I didnt get why these guys were a bit miffed at each other to start with. I understand a level of competitive drive. But not to the extent it overflows to where Id continue playing carpark baseball if the other guy was being an asshat. Not sure that makes sense (talking about my comment). I understand there needed to be that element to move the story.

Anyway well done!
 
Noel Evans said:
Hmmm I just had a quick read and saw peoples thoughts on the effect. I found it disorientating and disturbing. In my mind it did what it was meant to.

Also I just read your synopsis. I had no idea these guys were parking attendants. I wondered, why are these guys playing ball in a carpark? Although I thought it played out fairly well from there. The other thing that mildly bothered me was I didnt get why these guys were a bit miffed at each other to start with. I understand a level of competitive drive. But not to the extent it overflows to where Id continue playing carpark baseball if the other guy was being an asshat. Not sure that makes sense (talking about my comment). I understand there needed to be that element to move the story.

Anyway well done!
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Thanks for the feedback, Noel. I don't know what to say about the whole carpark employee thing--I think the reflective vests, parking sign, and traffic cones are pretty much a dead giveaway. Hope it didn't take you out of the movie.
 
This is a simple enough film - produced elegantly enough with limited resources, it feels quite fresh and contemporary in approach.

I enjoyed it - and its unique perspective of an incoming zombie - from the damanged mind's eye. I also liked that some thought obviously went into the ending.

Kudos for that. Of course in any normal horror film, our poor friends don't get too many chances before the baseball bat or bullet whaks the brain. In this case the character (acted competently enough) seriously challenges himself and his ability to protect himself, and to kill his friend.

Always a joy to shoot in an overcast sky and have everyone believe you should have used an ND filter. (Really you should have hehe.) The cinematography etc was functional and expressed well the idea of this man's damaged head. The 'effect' however did get a little tiring, and perhaps the pace slowed too much, at times wobbling the momentum of the story.

In all a fairly artsy entry, that i quite enjoyed. Well enough played sir!
 
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