Chris_Keaton
ScriptFEST Mod
I can't comment on the technical stuff, so I'll let the experts do that.
On my first viewing I didn't get it. I can now say I see where you were going, but I just don't see the point. It's not Lawrie confusing, but there are bits in there like the roomate that I just don't understand their purpose. I get that she is a nurse that provides him with blood. But why doesn't he have fangs why isn't he just killing like a regular vampire. I think all of that could be interesting if somehow we knew what got him to that point and then his temptation would have heightened drama. If you get my drift. Overall good job.
On my first viewing I didn't get it. I can now say I see where you were going, but I just don't see the point. It's not Lawrie confusing, but there are bits in there like the roomate that I just don't understand their purpose. I get that she is a nurse that provides him with blood. But why doesn't he have fangs why isn't he just killing like a regular vampire. I think all of that could be interesting if somehow we knew what got him to that point and then his temptation would have heightened drama. If you get my drift. Overall good job.