AFTER CLASS - snodart & Tim Young

Preston, thanks for the comments.

preston said:
I would have paid money to see you rack focus from the desk to the kid right after the teacher smashed the egg (4:25). how's that for nit-picky? actually, I couldn't see any room or need for improvement anywhere.
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That's funny, my wife kept telling me to use the shot we had with the rack focus. I honestly can't remember why I ened up using the one without, but I do remember trying to decide :)


preston said:
perfect moment in time for the six-minute time-frame. I love to write short stories like this, just focusing on short time periods...
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I think you just did a better job of summing up what we were trying to do than I have done. In fact, when we were coming up with the story, I think Tim's exact words were "a moment in time".

Thanks for the comments.
 
;)


I tried quoting selectively but gave up. I made general notes in Word, the crafted a review and then cut and paste when posting. Somehow that mixed things up.

Anyway, Jason, no i was not making an assumption on you personally. Perhaps i should have said "storywise, you're buying into the intolerance that your "theme" was espousing against "

Hey what i think your theme is and what i think your trying to convey is completely subjective. Personally, i though it was stereotypical. The thick glasses and gel in the hair. Starch white shirt with black tie. Clipped expressions and whiny lecturing about obedience. I've seen it all too often in many different portrayals and it's a caricature. I'm sure i could take that exact same character and put it on SNL without missing a beat.

Hey, it's only an opinion. If you get a ton of people saying it's an original character with great acting, then i'd be happy for ya. seriously.

As to the more imprtant part of your post :
snodart said:
...rather a question, can organized religion and spirituality truly exist together
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Ok, fair enough. In that case you didn't succeed, IMO. The script was too simplistic and 2 dimensional to truly achieve that.

It's a topic that i think is worthy of really exploring, but in that exploration i want to see originality and i want to see 3 dmensional characters with visuals that linger and subtext that makes you think. In your script all the dialogue was on the nose and besides the opening scene (which i loved btw) the visuals didn't impart that meaning with which you were trying to convey, IMO.

I promised to be really truthful in this fest , so i appreciate your trying to understand my review and where i was coming from.

As i mentioned in the review, i think you're talented and dug some of your shots. I just wish that you had explored your theme more creatively.

And David, i apologize if you thought i sounded angry. Far from it. I'm cool as a cucumber. I'm really neutral about this kind of material. And the theme is a deep and worthwhile one to me.
Your acting in "The Artist" was aaight (if that helps any) :)

Jason, hope that clarifies things, and i'll move on (trying to review as many as possible) so others can contribute to your thread. thanks a bunch.





:beer:
 
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snodart said:
Preston, thanks for the comments.

That's funny, my wife kept telling me to use the shot we had with the rack focus. I honestly can't remember why I ened up using the one without, but I do remember trying to decide :)



I think you just did a better job of summing up what we were trying to do than I have done. In fact, when we were coming up with the story, I think Tim's exact words were "a moment in time".

Thanks for the comments.
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I like the shot with no rack its more powerful becuase its about the boy the movie is about the boy. great movie man!
 
spidey said:
I like the shot with no rack its more powerful becuase its about the boy the movie is about the boy. great movie man!
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I agree, it's about the boy - especially in this very shot, so why not rack to him and see his expression? I don't understand what you're saying, spidey. it's not my film, so I'm not trying to defend anything here, I'm just trying to understand your logic.

if you would have said, "no rack . . . it's about the egg, about the egg . . .", I wouldn't have agreed, but I would have understood what you were saying. :)
 
oh well i see hmm well it makes it look like it the egg is the more power subject matter and when amazing grace plays it all about the boys loss.
 
spidey said:
oh well i see hmm well it makes it look like it the egg is the more power subject matter and when amazing grace plays it all about the boys loss.
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yeah, probably why they chose the 'no rack' shot - to sit on the egg (bad choice of words, sorry) for maximum effect. the teacher is killing a lot, symbolically here. not just the unborn life in the egg, but perhaps the boy's trust, faith, hope in adults as well as in authority/religon. maybe he (the boy) saw the death of grace (queue the music!) . . .

wow, I never knew a focus (no-)rack could say so much!
 
Great job on this short. The acting was good. Kids usually get on my nerves in acting roles. These seemed in their element. Concannon did a great job as the overbearing preaching-teacher. I liked that you showed how he was so consumed with his own dogmatic upbringing that it blinded him to true human interaction and feelings. Which is often the cases in fundamentalists like that character.

I had a good feeling from the kids in the end. It was like they were moving on and hopeful in the wake of an unpleasant experience.

Great job on your film. I'm a fan.
 
WOW! What a great film. You guys are amazing!

So simple and so well told. And I love the CC of this film. It is so steril without being boring. Very interesting look.

The lighting was gorgeous. The cinematography was perfect. The editing was great.

The actors were fantastic! The little boy is incredible!!!

What a great film.

I loved the score and the sound design. The echo of the room was brilliant.

Great job guys! Congrats!
 
This is one of those movies that subliminally illustrates the consequences of abuse-of-power from adults and how it spoils the good childhood experience of their victims. The soundtrack, acting, cinematography, all strain to evoke a mixture of emotions from a viewer point of view. This is one of the sharpest writing I've seen in this competition.

Great job,
 
RomanJaquez said:
This is one of those movies that subliminally illustrates the consequences of abuse-of-power from adults and how it spoils the good childhood experience of their victims.
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I agree, the breaking of the bird egg was an incredibly cruel thing to do and has haunted me since I watched it.
 
Excellent film guys. I could definitely relate to it. It felt very natural to me. I really really did not like the teacher. But that's because he did a damn good job. Great acting all around. And very nice story telling.

david jerome
 
Blaine said:
I agree, the breaking of the bird egg was an incredibly cruel thing to do and has haunted me since I watched it.
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That was a powerful moment in a very well executed film.
 
After Class - review

The beginning really got my attention. The color scheme is rich and interesting. I like the first line of dialog coming from the little girl. It conveys innocence and creates an authority in the boy which is later contrasted with the boy and the authority in the teacher.

For location I give you a 10. Very well lit and the color scheme you used is motivated and very well used.

The acting in this was phenomenal. The boy is a natural, just with his expression (and I'm sure good direction had a lot to do with this). I liked the teacher character and thought that this was David's best performance in the fest.

The editing was smooth and didn't distract me from the movie.

I really liked when the music changed when the teacher enters the room.

I appreciated the idea that there was only dialog when required and the images and facial expressions conveyed a lot of the story and emotion.

You get points for following the ‘Eric’ rule.

At about TC 4:26 would have liked to see a rack focus to Eric.

TC 4:34 really like the CU of face and dialog referencing dirt in the ‘face’… it seems very motivated.

I love the dichotomy of the little girls innocence and the symbolism of the egg vs. the ‘rules’ and lack of understanding from the teacher.

Favorite shots at TC5:51, 2:11 (you can figure it out)

Favorite camera movement at TC4:42

Almost flawless and one of my viewing factors is do I ever lose interest, and with this movie, I did not. Very well done!

This is definitely in my top 5.
 
Top 5 movie indeed :)

Beautifully shot movie enjoyed it.
I know this has already been said but, I think if David's part was just a bit shorter it would have been better.. and trust me thats beans cuz this is a really good movie.
 
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