Robin the Spy! Something Fowl is afoot.

insanityfw said:
Ok, I re-downloaded and now it's playing back fine.

I really liked to concept and most of the style used to shoot with, but since you're a fan of real criticism...I'll give you my opinions.

1. Acting was pretty off. It effected the pacing a bit too much. I kept wanting a few frames shaved off some of the shots, but the pacing of dialogue wouldn't allow it.
2. Locations were nice and added production value.
3. The sound was really uneven and again messed with the pacing for me.
4. I didn't get the ending, but I think it was a sound level issue and a visual disconnect. I think that he accidentally completed his mission by shooting the person off-screen????
5. Most of the shots were really well done. One, I didn't like...The low-angle shot on Robyn in the briefing room gave the feeling of him having some kind of strength, when it should have shown him as inept (now, I'm nitpicking)
6. Main actor was goofy in the right way. The first actor on the piece was the strongest, but most felt like they were delivering lines rather than becoming their characters.

All in all, I guess that's it. I still think it was fun and well done, but with some pacing changes and a few more insert shots you could have really kicked this one up a couple of notches.

Best,

Jason
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Awesome! I actually really appreciate this, I'll address each point.

1. I thought the majority of the acting was decent but I agree that the pacing is off in spots.

2. Thanks!

3. Help me with this one, are you referring to the music? Or sound overall. I agree that I do need to work on my sound/effects.

4. He shot a car off screen and it crashed.... quite by accident. Hence the .."Oh dear!" :)

5. Interesting... I agree that some of that scene is the weakest of the three. Mostly my fault.

6. Thanks! It was my first time directing actors, not friends. I think I did a bit more watching instead of directing. I still think they did a pretty good job though. Eagle (Ian Quick) was quite good on his own and it shows.


insanityfw said:
All in all, I guess that's it. I still think it was fun and well done, but with some pacing changes and a few more insert shots you could have really kicked this one up a couple of notches.

Best,

Jason
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Thanks for that! There will be some scene changes, a few location inserts, and a full score in the final edit.


Thanks again! I really do appreciate this.


Mike
 
Hey Mike if that was your first time working with actors, then you're well on your way in the right direction. Hollywood may not care about first time, tenth time, etc., but we're not Hollywood, so my hats off to you.

Also, comedy is really hard. To pull it off as well as you did is a really good sign.

My comment about the sound is really that a lot of the sound wasn't very dynamic or even throughout scene transitions. The sound effects needed to be cleaner and more realistic to help tell what was going on. They felt fairly canned and flat and the volume levels weren't real consistent.

For my Horrorfest short that never made the fest i asked Conrad Johnson, from this site, to do a sound mix and it helped out a whole lot. It took the film and made it more 3 dimensional.

Again, this all might be minor, but holistically it all can make projects better.

Thanks for taking the feedback well.

Best,

Jason
 
Awesome feedback! Really helpful.

I would love to run into someone who could work on the sound. Maybe next time If I can get the edit finished ahead of time I can ask around here to see if someone can help me out.

Great advice!

Cheers,

Mike

Cheers,

Mike
 
Kyser said:
Awesome feedback! Really helpful.

I would love to run into someone who could work on the sound. Maybe next time If I can get the edit finished ahead of time I can ask around here to see if someone can help me out.

Great advice!

Cheers,

Mike

Cheers,

Mike
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You will definitely find MANY gifted people that can help out. That's the amazing thing about this forum over so many others out on the big-bad web.

Best of luck,

J.
 
Alex Jeffery said:
I really liked this one. It was clever and you had some great shots. One that stands out in my mind is the ace of spades in the grass. Also Robin looks like Clark Kent. I really liked the bit with the gadget agent projected on the screen. How did you do that? The reflections on the table were awesome!

Awesome work.
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Thanks! The shot of the ace of spades is one of my favourites. I also tried my best with the reflection in the glass as well, glad you liked it. I was hoping someone would.

I shot the scene with the female agent separately and then played it back in my Home Theatre. Robin acted along with it while it played back.

Glad you liked the effect.

I really need to re-work that scene though.

Mike
 
Mike,

What can I say? Great job! It's exciting to watch a script you've written come to life. Thanks for working so hard to make it happen.

And don't forget to pick up some milk.

John
 
Hey man, good short.
It was very entertaining and light-hearted.

And I think you were one of the few to use a different camera so big thumbs up for that!

I thought some of the acting could've been a little better.
In the opening scene, it just seemed like you were working with non-actors and felt pretty noticeable. I didn't have a problem with the guy who played Robin though.

And of course, there were some audio issues, but for handling it yourself it was really good. Especially in the church scene where you cut between them talking on the headsets. I was really impressed with the audio in that scene.

For me, the audio where that woman shows all those gadgets to Robin had too much reverb where you couldn't really hear her very well.

But kudos on the film!

Hope to see more from you in future fests!

P.S. - Make friends with audio people. Lots of friends. I am very fortunate to have audio engineers as friends who are really into sound design and sound is such a crucial component. Without them, I'd be nothing.
 
johnlabonney said:
Mike,

What can I say? Great job! It's exciting to watch a script you've written come to life. Thanks for working so hard to make it happen.

And don't forget to pick up some milk.

John
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Thanks, John!

Hopefully the final draft will improve on things even more.

Cheers,

Mike
 
aravance said:
Hey man, good short.
It was very entertaining and light-hearted.

And I think you were one of the few to use a different camera so big thumbs up for that!

I thought some of the acting could've been a little better.
In the opening scene, it just seemed like you were working with non-actors and felt pretty noticeable. I didn't have a problem with the guy who played Robin though.

And of course, there were some audio issues, but for handling it yourself it was really good. Especially in the church scene where you cut between them talking on the headsets. I was really impressed with the audio in that scene.

For me, the audio where that woman shows all those gadgets to Robin had too much reverb where you couldn't really hear her very well.

But kudos on the film!

Hope to see more from you in future fests!

P.S. - Make friends with audio people. Lots of friends. I am very fortunate to have audio engineers as friends who are really into sound design and sound is such a crucial component. Without them, I'd be nothing.
Click to expand...

Imprint is one of my favourites in this Fest.

I really appreciate the fact that you took the time to review my film.
I agree that the audio has issues and I hope to correct them in the final edit.

I'm hoping that as time goes by I will start to make some connections and improve an all fronts. I think I tried to do too much entirely by myself.

Thanks for the great advice.

Cheers,

Mike
 
I tried to do too much entirely by myself.
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I think most of us are guilty of that Mike especially me .
It would be nice to have a sound guy , lighting and costume peoplebut alas it is us in the end .lol
Glad to see many if not all are enjoying your first entry .
Ian
 
Good job. I don't know if "charming" is a guy's word, but that's what it was. I really like the photography and the composition of the shots. I like the acting for the most part and I thought it was paced well. I hate to be nitpicking, but that's the only thing I can be with a film I feel is pretty solid, so here goes:

1. The woman agent in the church came off more like an office assitant than an agent, but I attribute that to the acting and not the script.

2. If you've got nothing better to do, cut out the whole scene with the gadget instructions. Hey, it's spy gear. I think we're all intelligent enough to know that those cards or that watch does SOMETHING. Cut directly from "oh no, not Agent Robin" dialogue to a shot of him in his nerdy glasses at the "job". You could add some voiceover or something to quickly explain what it is he is supposed to do. I think it would play great, even if it's only 3 or 4 minutes in length when done.


That's all I've got. Great job. One of my favorites of the fest.

Thanks for screening.
 
cinealma said:
Good job. I don't know if "charming" is a guy's word, but that's what it was. I really like the photography and the composition of the shots. I like the acting for the most part and I thought it was paced well. I hate to be nitpicking, but that's the only thing I can be with a film I feel is pretty solid, so here goes:

1. The woman agent in the church came off more like an office assitant than an agent, but I attribute that to the acting and not the script.

2. If you've got nothing better to do, cut out the whole scene with the gadget instructions. Hey, it's spy gear. I think we're all intelligent enough to know that those cards or that watch does SOMETHING. Cut directly from "oh no, not Agent Robin" dialogue to a shot of him in his nerdy glasses at the "job". You could add some voiceover or something to quickly explain what it is he is supposed to do. I think it would play great, even if it's only 3 or 4 minutes in length when done.


That's all I've got. Great job. One of my favorites of the fest.

Thanks for screening.
Click to expand...

Thanks for your thoughts!

1. I blame myself, I really didn't direct her as much as I should have. I should have had her do that scene differently.

2. You know what! I may just try that. That scene is the weak point of the entire thing and it just doesn't work as is. I also have an office scene that is actually pretty good. Robin returns the briefcase to Eagle and hilarity ensues.

I really thought that taking out the scene where he gets the cards & watch might confuse people. Maybe having a slight voice over might clear that up.

cinealma said:
One of my favorites of the fest.
Click to expand...
Wow! I don't know what to say...
:dankk2:

Mike
 
Kyser said:
2. You know what! I may just try that. That scene is the weak point of the entire thing and it just doesn't work as is.
Click to expand...

It's just too static. Nothing much going on. And it's really "video-like", if you know what I mean (not that video is bad). I just think it doesn't fit with the rest of the photography.

Kyser said:
I also have an office scene that is actually pretty good. Robin returns the briefcase to Eagle and hilarity ensues.
Click to expand...

NOW THAT WOULD WORK!

If you decide to recut, let me know. I'd love to see it!
 
Heheh. This was a lot of fun.

Music was perfect!

DOF was used pretty well.

Still think you could get a more filmic look with the CC.

Funny stuff. Thanks for Sharing it.


:beer:
 
Keystoned said:
Heheh. This was a lot of fun.

Music was perfect!

DOF was used pretty well.

Still think you could get a more filmic look with the CC.

Funny stuff. Thanks for Sharing it.


:beer:
Click to expand...

Thanks! Any tips on CC'ing in Premiere Pro 1.5?
I'm doing the new edit and could really use the help.
What's the best way to get it more filmic?

Thanks,

Mike
 
Wish I could answer you on Premiere. I use colorista, G film, and Magic Bullet on FCP.

I can tell you vaguely that you wan an S. Shaped gamma curve.

Also try getting richer blacks without darkening the overall image.
(part of the S gamma curve)

What I will strongly recommend is that you pick up this book:
The DV Rebel's Guide

They also have a forum here
http://rebelsguide.com/forum/index.php

If you have Premiere you might look into getting After Effects for top notch CC. You can get version 6.5 for cheap online. But the color grading scripts that come on the DVD with the book only work for AE 7.
 
Thanks for that! I actually already own AE 6.5

I did reduce the saturation quite a lot more in PPro and I can tell you that I'm really starting to like what I'm seeing.

I'll be posting some pics later for opinions.

Thanks again for the latest post! I'll look into everything you mentioned.

PS- The new edit is really looking much better.

Cheers,

Mike
 
I have to say, I'm glad there are some people who decided to go the comedy route with this fest. Your film was humorous and entertaining, and overall, well put together. I felt that the gear review scene was a bit long, but I don't know that it needs to be cut altogether. Robin was so earnest in his spy endeavors that I cheered inside when the briefcase ended up being left behind for him to just walk over and pick up. Nice.

Good work. :)
 
I enjoyed this film. It was fun. The reveal was nicely handled (though I could have used another few seconds of Robin looking around wondering how things could have worked out so well.

I do agree with the comment on the second agent in the church. I felt like she needed a bit more life. As for the gadget scene, I thought it was appropriate, but I felt like Robin's responses were just a hair over the top. I tend to do "cheesy" comedy myself (though I've tried to tone it down in my own piece for this fest) and it seemed like Robin could have been the bumbling spy without going all the way over the edge.

Again, I enjoyed this one. The story was clear. Shots were nicely composed. Good work!
 
Thanks! I've really cleaned up the gadget explanation scene in the new edit. It is now just a few shots and voice overs during other scenes.

Like flashbacks in a way...

I really like the flow of the new edit much more than the original.

Hopefully everyone will agree once I post it.

Thanks for the great comments!

Mike
 
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