---[] One Percent []---

Yup, I gotta comment on that too... The creepy girl sequence at the beginning was executed very well; the only problem was that I think it should have been longer to give us a chance to take it in and be truly unsettled by it. You know how to rock an image and drag it out of the box, your shots and angles are commendable. I've always liked your films and can't wait to see what you come up with next!
Thanks, man. If you make things too long then people start to analyze the effects and get taken out of the moment. Just my opinion.
The lead in could have been a tad longer though.

Thanks for the advice.

MAH
 
Really enjoyed this one from top to bottom. I love the interesting shots you drop in, from the mirror shot near the beginning that shows the creatures eye reflected, to the really simply cut away of the gas burner and teapot.

Best of all, I like that you didn't show us more of the creature, especially at the end. The simple ending of his daughter telling him it's time to go is sweet.

Nice job! One of my favorites so far.
 
Michael,

I liked the opening cards and the use of the sound mix to add emphasis. Nice use of camera movement in this. Felt cinematic. I am not sure if I completely "got" the story. people are disappearing due to some force or monster and that's what happened to the girl and now it's Dad's turn? no explanation left me a little confused.

I felt the Dad's performance swung a little too quickly to emotional on the phone on the "I miss her too" line. Overall the performances were good. Liked the tone and tempo as a whole and some really nice shots. Always amazed at what you accomplish with no crew. Well done.
 
Really enjoyed this one from top to bottom. I love the interesting shots you drop in, from the mirror shot near the beginning that shows the creatures eye reflected, to the really simply cut away of the gas burner and teapot.

Best of all, I like that you didn't show us more of the creature, especially at the end. The simple ending of his daughter telling him it's time to go is sweet.

Nice job! One of my favorites so far.
Thanks! Subtlety is usually the way I go. Using your imagination to fill in the blanks can be far more frightening.

Thanks again!


Michael,

I liked the opening cards and the use of the sound mix to add emphasis. Nice use of camera movement in this. Felt cinematic. I am not sure if I completely "got" the story. people are disappearing due to some force or monster and that's what happened to the girl and now it's Dad's turn? no explanation left me a little confused.

I felt the Dad's performance swung a little too quickly to emotional on the phone on the "I miss her too" line. Overall the performances were good. Liked the tone and tempo as a whole and some really nice shots. Always amazed at what you accomplish with no crew. Well done.
Thanks so much. I think the last shot helps explain what happened. Maybe you missed that. Use headphones or a sub as well because it helps drive it home.

As for the line that drove the emotion, if I'm at a weak moment and the mention of my abducted daughter were to pop up like that, I would do my best to hold myself together but it would be a struggle. That was his direction. Lose it for a second but try not to let her know.

Thanks again! I'm a big fan and really appreciate you taking the time.

MAH
 
ok, I went and grabbed my headset and noticed more of a shadow on the outside of the house. I got it. I should be using a headset on all of these. I think the sound mix really shines in this throughout. again well done!
 
ok, I went and grabbed my headset and noticed more of a shadow on the outside of the house. I got it. I should be using a headset on all of these. I think the sound mix really shines in this throughout. again well done!
Thanks, man. It really does, Herman helped quite a bit. 5.1 or bust! :)
I use sound cues for a lot in my entries.
 
nice dolly shots throughout this. liked the pacing. never got terribly invested but never got bored. the only thing that took me out briefly was the dad's reaction to seeing his daughter at first, he seemed a little underwhelmed.
 
MAH, I like this one. I definitely loved the camera work, as it was also the HV20. The Kitchen scenes when on the phone were great. This one had me driving to what was going to happen next. Good score and use of the sound effect after each scene changed. Cool ending as well.
 
nice dolly shots throughout this. liked the pacing. never got terribly invested but never got bored. the only thing that took me out briefly was the dad's reaction to seeing his daughter at first, he seemed a little underwhelmed.
After 3 years it was shock and wonder. He also thought (as he said) it may have been another dream. Thanks, man.
 
MAH, I like this one. I definitely loved the camera work, as it was also the HV20. The Kitchen scenes when on the phone were great. This one had me driving to what was going to happen next. Good score and use of the sound effect after each scene changed. Cool ending as well.
Thanks, man. I especially like the music/sound when the line goes dead. Herman really worked his magic there. The tone of the scene changes completely.

Thanks again,


Mike
 
Beautifully shot and very creepy! My house creaked while I was watching your film and it totally made me jump.

My only comment would be that the lead's scene on the phone seemed pushed and a little fake. That kind of took me out of the story. I really liked the little girl's performance! Super creepy.

Overall, I really enjoyed this :)
 
Well done short! I loved how you went with a very natural lit look to the film and I loved how you played with atmosphere to create unease for the viewer. Excellent job on the short this one is one of my favorites!
 
Very nicely done, one of my favs in the fest. I liked the effects too, they seemed simple and definitely suited the plot.

For the ghostly looking girl, how did you do that? It looked like she was wearing something and then you did something after effecty on her to give her that strange shimmer/subtle glow thingie... ah look at me talking all technical and... stuff.

Oh and if you don't feel the need to share your secret it's OK... I understand...
 
Very nicely done, one of my favs in the fest. I liked the effects too, they seemed simple and definitely suited the plot.

For the ghostly looking girl, how did you do that? It looked like she was wearing something and then you did something after effecty on her to give her that strange shimmer/subtle glow thingie... ah look at me talking all technical and... stuff.

Oh and if you don't feel the need to share your secret it's OK... I understand...
No secrets here.

We webbed her up in the Halloween webbing you buy in the stores. That was the practical effects side of it, along with a dolly in for the closeup.
Justin added some lighting and a bit of shimmering ripple effect.

I wish we had more time but the camera was locked down as she was to appear at both sides of the room in the same shot.
Cocooned at one end, looking at the music box in the other. So we had to move fast. That and it was getting late. :)

Glad you enjoyed it enough to place it amongst your favourites.

Thanks!

Mike
 
Best of the fest, and hands down best on the creep factor.

A few nitpicks ....

Phone call pulled me out of the relationship with the father and the daughter. It was likes 'brakes on' to squeeze in some backstory that didn't really resolve much. I think this could have been accomplished via VO as he stood over the basin, and let Ian do what he does best - exude emotions. Lose the drink, maybe toss in a glimpse of the girl in the mirror as Ian battles his wits.

Love the way we see the girl in the mirror. Freaked me out of my skin. Not in love with the cobwebs on the girl - looked a little like five and dime Halloween decorations.

What I enjoy about your work is that you give the viewer the chance to engage, and imagine just enough on their own to make the experience all theirs - as opposed to all T's crossed and I's dotted.

Regardless of these opines, it's my fave.

You always deliver, Mike. No matter the theme, you make the 6 minutes count.

aw
 
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Hi Mike,

You've made a top 3 film here IMO. I would say it had the most cinematic opening of anything on offer here. I loved it. Grabbed instantly. For me, I think this is the first time I've seen your work really stand out from the crowd.

It was a slight comedown that your mid section became a rather straight forward telephone conversation in a kitchen, because the mood has been heightened so much visually; but I guess that's the nature of getting the exposition across in a short time.

I dont know if it was intentional but I almost thought he was imagining things because we only saw her room in flashbacks; maybe you could have had him visiting her preserved empty room for a more visual representation of their loss whilst he was on the phone, picking old toys up while talking and closing the door behind him, so there's a stark contrast when he goes back in to see her in it with all the toys alive/working moments later.

But I liked the ominous ending and I'd probably pick this as my second fave of the fest. Everything you do seems to get better each time. Your best work so far I think.
 
Best of the fest, and hands down best on the creep factor.

A few nitpicks ....

Phone call pulled me out of the relationship with the father and the daughter. It was likes 'brakes on' to squeeze in some backstory that didn't really resolve much. I think this could have been accomplished via VO as he stood over the basin, and let Ian do what he does best - exude emotions. Lose the drink, maybe toss in a glimpse of the girl in the mirror as Ian battles his wits.

Love the way we see the girl in the mirror. Freaked me out of my skin. Not in love with the cobwebs on the girl - looked a little like five and dime Halloween decorations.

What I enjoy about your work is that you give the viewer the chance to engage, and imagine just enough on their own to make the experience all theirs - as opposed to all T's crossed and I's dotted.

Regardless of these opines, it's my fave.

You always deliver, Mike. No matter the theme, you make the 6 minutes count.

aw
Thanks so much. Glad it was among your faves.
BTW, I went for 4 minutes this fest, partially do to me moving. :)
Glad you liked it.

Mike
 
Hi Mike,

You've made a top 3 film here IMO. I would say it had the most cinematic opening of anything on offer here. I loved it. Grabbed instantly. For me, I think this is the first time I've seen your work really stand out from the crowd.

It was a slight comedown that your mid section became a rather straight forward telephone conversation in a kitchen, because the mood has been heightened so much visually; but I guess that's the nature of getting the exposition across in a short time.

I dont know if it was intentional but I almost thought he was imagining things because we only saw her room in flashbacks; maybe you could have had him visiting her preserved empty room for a more visual representation of their loss whilst he was on the phone, picking old toys up while talking and closing the door behind him, so there's a stark contrast when he goes back in to see her in it with all the toys alive/working moments later.

But I liked the ominous ending and I'd probably pick this as my second fave of the fest. Everything you do seems to get better each time. Your best work so far I think.
Thanks! I really appreciate such a compliment form a past winner.
I actually had some ideas to shoot with Ian alone in her room but alas, I had to pack it up and move. :)

Great advice, and I'll take second place any day! Just to place in this fest would be great.

Cheers,

Mike
 
This film moves in a fluid, incessant pattern that sucks the viewer right in and doesn't allow them the chance to stall. It reminds me of some works by Altman, Demme, and especially PT Anderson (who of course drew much inspiration from both former filmmakers). The perpetual motion combined with the sound design develop a claustrophobic and anticipatory atmosphere that is just tremendously foreboding. Once the scene stops moving in a static shot of the ballerina music box, a chill runs up the spine. This bit of mis-en-scene truly ups the ante. Once the ballerina starts, the camera draws the viewer in again. Excellent direction of this sequence. I wondered to myself for a moment if it might be more effective to refrain from zooming forward after the ballerina begins to move and keeping the next shot static, but I think you made the right decision in restarting the motion of the scene. You stop long enough to tell us something new and then pull us further. Love it! And the black void seen in the mirror, creeping, in a way, behind the dancer is ominous and menacing.

Sometimes I feel like some filmmakers' use of intentional contrast between quaint, innocent, child-like musical themes and dark imagery and subtext gets too heavy handed (an obvious example would be something like "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" used in a slow-motion shoot-out in Face/Off), but your elements fit together well.

Once the dream sequence comes in, the film continues to move fluidly while highlighting the man's inner distress and crucial pieces of information about the girl. It also sets up the supernatural and/or abduction elements of the story with the thick, heavy blinking of the "being's" eyes and the symbol of her captured on the floor. This scene, believe it or not, actually did make me jump. This is a great example of how to use "jump" moments effectively. You built up the tension and mystery so well that, even though one can assume what will happen, it still catches you off-guard, just like a dream would.

Your handheld work after the sequence from the doorway does suggest a watchful eye on the protagonist.

I thought the acting was very strong. I can understand some of the complaints about the man's sudden change in demeanor not coming through as earnest and believable, but a scene like that, in such a short film, would be difficult for most to pull off. So while the scene on the phone could use work, it's in no way a bad scene. I think the majority of the scene's troubles come in the en medias res aspect of the dialogue. From the first few words, there's already conflict. A scene like this depends so heavily on authentic performances because the actors have to give the audience so much historical information without too much exposition. One of the only things that struck me as in need of work is actually an audio issue. The woman's dialogue comes through the phone with a little bit of "futzing" as is natural in this type of scene, but it sounds just a little more clean than the dialogue from the man. The kitchen yields a little more bounce, so it fills the room. Sometimes we hear her words very clearly, but times when he says things like "a little" get a little lost. Could just be minor mixing issue. I would try to pump his dialogue up just a hair. But, the scene does end up playing smooth enough and after a second viewing, I like both performances more. I love the diagetic cut to the flame burning on the stove; a very symbolic image that works well in the context of the film. I like that it creeps forward slowly.

The music is very effective in this film. I love the ambient score. It wavers with such melancholy and loneliness. The rest of the score feels right as well.

The television turning on to static is a tried-and-true technique and is quite scary. (For me, it's scary in the context of a horrible incident with a bad tv signal that happened when I was a child. Scared the crap out of me!) The high-pitch squeal of the kettle really takes the anxiety to another level. It, in conjunction with the tv static and the automated operator on the phone, work well as a mosaic of unrelated sounds working together to deliver a triad of non-coincidental elements.

The lead's performance may dive into the emotions just a little too heavily when he sees his "daughter." It might have seemed more logical for him to be a little more awe-struck and confused by her sitting on the bed. But, once again, the performance isn't bad. It just comes very quickly. The girl worked well here, delivering a cold, cynical set of lines.

The final shot really solidifies the abduction process with the alien transmission sounds that were heard earlier in the film. The shot itself is lit, framed, and colored very well and the darkness descending upon the house leaves the audience with a feeling of dread. Nice!

This really is an extremely effective short with lots to admire. I think it stands as some of your best work yet, and that says a lot as I remember you sifting through multiple ideas and projects, trying to decide which to pursue for this festival. And you were also in the process of moving, correct?

Great work! :beer:
 
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