"Grid Down" a film by Shawn Nelson
- Thread starter Shawn Philip Nelson
- Start date
Matt Harris
Veteran
Ok assuming you get the crew on board...
I'll throw in one more opinion and then i'll shut up:
What you have created here goes beyond webisodes. Instead of thinking three 7 minute webisodes (21 mins), treat it as a tv pilot (22 mins). This looks like a damn tv show. Without DVX time restraints, you already have prolly 7-8 minutes, so just make a pilot episode.
Then shop it. to every network. if no one bites then enter it into fests as a 22 minute short. Throw it on kickstarter, raise more money and make it a feature. So much potential here.
By the way, as they walk off into the hills at the end, that would be the first commercial break.
I'll throw in one more opinion and then i'll shut up:
What you have created here goes beyond webisodes. Instead of thinking three 7 minute webisodes (21 mins), treat it as a tv pilot (22 mins). This looks like a damn tv show. Without DVX time restraints, you already have prolly 7-8 minutes, so just make a pilot episode.
Then shop it. to every network. if no one bites then enter it into fests as a 22 minute short. Throw it on kickstarter, raise more money and make it a feature. So much potential here.
By the way, as they walk off into the hills at the end, that would be the first commercial break.
ryanjf
Well-known member
For web series, I'm sure there would be PLENTY of post sound work to go around. I've done a few in the past and they are very demanding, and yet too fun.
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
Ok assuming you get the crew on board...
I'll throw in one more opinion and then i'll shut up:
What you have created here goes beyond webisodes. Instead of thinking three 7 minute webisodes (21 mins), treat it as a tv pilot (22 mins). This looks like a damn tv show. Without DVX time restraints, you already have prolly 7-8 minutes, so just make a pilot episode.
Then shop it. to every network. if no one bites then enter it into fests as a 22 minute short. Throw it on kickstarter, raise more money and make it a feature. So much potential here.
By the way, as they walk off into the hills at the end, that would be the first commercial break.
Interesting idea. But wait, since when is a tv pilot 22min? Shouldnt it be like...40 min?
JaceBrownlow
Well-known member
Dang! This would be an amazing to see! If you end up doing it, I want to help out in any way I can!
Alan H. Chang
Veteran
Shawn, he's been talking about this on our backend. Always excited to hear whenever there's an opportunity.
Matt Harris
Veteran
You're right Shawn, Grid Down should be an hour long show, but for the sake of brevity, just shoot the 22 min version (30 with commercials) and shop it.
If you keep it fairly PG-13 you can go for WB, NBC, AMC etc. If you want to go HBO, Stars, Showtime you'll need sex and violence.
If you keep it fairly PG-13 you can go for WB, NBC, AMC etc. If you want to go HBO, Stars, Showtime you'll need sex and violence.
Charli
cool little "title"
Why wouldn't the law enforcement look for weapons, why take anyone's word for it if world is precarious for everyone? Why would neighbor have shot gun he doesn't know how to use but a hand gun he probably knows how to use?
End of world stories have been done before. So what can you do to make this more original? Acting good. I understand why lighting was off. It's a good film, just some points I would change to make it more believable.
I did like the shot glasses of water. Foreshadowing of famine that could one day come. Good film overall.
End of world stories have been done before. So what can you do to make this more original? Acting good. I understand why lighting was off. It's a good film, just some points I would change to make it more believable.
I did like the shot glasses of water. Foreshadowing of famine that could one day come. Good film overall.
Mobie540
Well-known member
This was shot solid, audio design was top notch. I liked your shot select and the edit. Your main actor did a great job. The supporting actors were good too.
The story itself was tough to swallow. Humans are pretty resilient and can adapt. Having society breakdown like that in 18 days is a bit unrealistic. I'd be at the crick boiling water at a camp fire.
The story itself was tough to swallow. Humans are pretty resilient and can adapt. Having society breakdown like that in 18 days is a bit unrealistic. I'd be at the crick boiling water at a camp fire.
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
Are they even law enforcement? They moved in very quickly, they moved just as fast...
The neighbor is dehydrated, not thinking straight, shotguns do take some thought, semi-automatic handguns, not as much. Besides, that handgun wasnt even cocked...
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
Remember remember the fifth of November...
and also notice that 'Grid Down' takes place on Nov 5th
and also notice that 'Grid Down' takes place on Nov 5th
Quick review: Real shame that the gradients didnt translate to the fest version - thats said, I would have boosted the grade for the fest version.
I was a touch thrown but the talk of money woes at the start insofar as the power quickly went off soon after. Male lead, solid performance for me - glued it all together seemed to have the most direction.
All this happened in a small space, so the lighting was well crafted to suit. One ding line for me "It's the neighbour girl".
Overall, very watchable.
I was a touch thrown but the talk of money woes at the start insofar as the power quickly went off soon after. Male lead, solid performance for me - glued it all together seemed to have the most direction.
All this happened in a small space, so the lighting was well crafted to suit. One ding line for me "It's the neighbour girl".
Overall, very watchable.
Three Billion Seconds
Active member
The lead took it down. Cant believe how quickly you organized.
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
'took it down' as in made it work for you, or didnt work for you? I think my lead hit it out of the park.
'How quickly I organized'? In what sense? Once I decide to shoot a short, it all moves quickly, but a ton of prep was put into this.
Imaginate
Well-known member
I enjoyed this story alot, I think it all came together , cool story, good acting, great cinematography, I loved all the choices you guys made with the tone of the images and the haze, I know it suffered a bit with the compression but it didn't distract , I'd love to see a higher rez version when the contest is over.
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
thank you sir!
an updated version will most certainly happen. 100mb h264 for a 6min short is heavy compression when you're trying to do nice gradients
Three Billion Seconds
Active member
Took it down, in a good way a very good way.
My short script is locked, yet the next step is currently avoiding me, its my responsibility to make it happen. In my world you put together a polished piece of work quickly, minus a few post things. In my opinion you have a short that’s going to open up many doors. If one puts in ten to eighteen hours a day and gets a film done that’s good in six months then to me that’s quick, if one puts in one hour a day for six months to get a film done then that’s slow. No one ever has a clue about the time one puts into these, except for those who do.
My short script is locked, yet the next step is currently avoiding me, its my responsibility to make it happen. In my world you put together a polished piece of work quickly, minus a few post things. In my opinion you have a short that’s going to open up many doors. If one puts in ten to eighteen hours a day and gets a film done that’s good in six months then to me that’s quick, if one puts in one hour a day for six months to get a film done then that’s slow. No one ever has a clue about the time one puts into these, except for those who do.
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lawriejaffa
Veteran
Of course we were chatting a little about this entry so I won't add too much here that we haven't already discussed Shawn!
I'd say that Charli's critiques are 'somewhat' apt, but it just depends on ones suspension of disbelief you see - its no surprise to me that those forgiving those minor details are the ones trumpeting it as an awseome pilot or possible web series (in a way a series regularly flies a little off reality (even when solumnely presenting its version of it!) where as a 'film' or a 'short film' is more aptly scrutinised.
That would be my single criticism for this (but its fairly relative) since its obviously aiming to promote a wider vision than a single mere short film (which as a short film it is a bit rubbish, but as a promo / example for a movie/series - rocks.)
Tim joy gave some harsh criticism but - BUT he has a point, now i wouldnt take the points quite as far as he does but... there is an element of truth in that critique, so don't be too quick to dismiss it, a slice of humble pie won't poison you promise!
As it is this film and AJ's i think are directly comparable score wise for me (albeit there very different in style)
Personally I would have preferred for you to take this further, it was 'passive' don't you think? Could the action - the stakes - the fear have been greater?
Its a rhetorical question really - its for you to ask yourself, could it have been more so? I think it would have made the film even stronger.
I'd say that Charli's critiques are 'somewhat' apt, but it just depends on ones suspension of disbelief you see - its no surprise to me that those forgiving those minor details are the ones trumpeting it as an awseome pilot or possible web series (in a way a series regularly flies a little off reality (even when solumnely presenting its version of it!) where as a 'film' or a 'short film' is more aptly scrutinised.
That would be my single criticism for this (but its fairly relative) since its obviously aiming to promote a wider vision than a single mere short film (which as a short film it is a bit rubbish, but as a promo / example for a movie/series - rocks.)
Tim joy gave some harsh criticism but - BUT he has a point, now i wouldnt take the points quite as far as he does but... there is an element of truth in that critique, so don't be too quick to dismiss it, a slice of humble pie won't poison you promise!
As it is this film and AJ's i think are directly comparable score wise for me (albeit there very different in style)
Personally I would have preferred for you to take this further, it was 'passive' don't you think? Could the action - the stakes - the fear have been greater?
Its a rhetorical question really - its for you to ask yourself, could it have been more so? I think it would have made the film even stronger.
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
Thanks guys! I really appreciate it!
Ah! nervous about final score! can't wait to see results!
Ah! nervous about final score! can't wait to see results!
Cryogenic Filmworks
Veteran
I enjoyed this one and voted as one of my top 3. Better luck next time. my biggest issue was the ending. Never a fan of "enemies" ending up in happy land together. Overall though I thought it was a pretty good entry.