The Upload - Darkfader
- Thread starter darkfader
- Start date
MattC
Veteran
Ok I watched this film a few times and would first like to echo the comments of others. Opening, set design, acting and lighting were all a little weak.
Opening. Didn't dig this at all. First, I didn't really care for the concept. Second, I thought the concept was poorly executed. The first point is a matter of taste, but the second isn't. My feeling is, if you are going to use SFX they really have to work, otherwise, you're better off going a more conventional route. You also used up valuable time that could have been better spent really setting up your story.
I didn't buy the "lab" location. I would have tried to get an actual lab somewhere (like a school). Baring that I might have made a small set in a room and then added in the majority of the "lab" through matte painting in photoshop - just something to think about or experiment with.
As far as the acting goes, hey it is what it is, you do the best you can with the talent that's available. I would have tried to make the characters more believable. After reading your flatliners post, I know the vibe you were going for, however, there was nothing in the story to tell me that and there was really no way to infer it. So that should somehow be addressed, either through a little exposition or visually. Or go for a more straight forward look. Those are tough decisions but when you only have six minutes, sometimes you can't be as creative as you would like.
Lighting. It seems to me that you shot this pretty dark. Doing so renders a certain type of image and, if you like that, keep doing it. I would suggest, however, that you experiment a bit with shooting, bright (but within a five stop range) and then exposing for the basic look you want (using ND filters and aperture) and then fine tuning your look in post. I think you will wind up with a cleaner, more pleasing image with better color. Also, you location, if you wanted to keep using it, begged for some creative lighting. Don't just light your actors, light your background in a way to create depth. So many folks seem to think that DOF (ie., a 35mm adapter) is the only way to create depth in a scene - it isn't. You can use composition and lighting as well. Ultimately using all three in varying amounts is what you should shoot for.
Composition. Much of your framing seems off to me. It's as if you composed for 4:3 instead of 16:9. An example of this is when you have the OTS shot of the girl speaking to one of the researches (2:15). She is framed center, he is just visible frame left and you have a lot of negative space frame right. Instead try filling the frame in such a shot. There are other examples, but I think YOU should go through your film and find them. Of course, you could say that you framed that way for artistic reasons but I personally don't think you're there yet (and neither am I). So focus on understanding and learning the "rules" first - then break them.
Camera movement. Some of it I like, but much of it seemed off due to the composition. I wonder if you story boarded this and planned all of your shots in advance? If not, I would try that next time, I think it would make for a cleaner more polished presentation.
Look. Didn't care for the heavy diffusion. It looks like you just selected a MB present and went with it. I would have tried to achieve more of my look with lighting and then grade the footage a bit more carefully. The stuff that was out of focus really killed it for me. The red elevator was too over the top.
Audio. The audio was good in some spots, not so good in others. I assume you used an on-camera mic for most of this? You should try using a mic on a boom. Also much of the dialog could have been enhanced in post to remove noise. A separate recorder could also help, but that just adds to the budget. The score was ok.
So there it is. Mostly negative I know, but hey, someday you'll get to say the same things to me! On the other hand, it was a neat little short and I liked the ending. I would like to see you rethink this and reshoot it, keeping in mind what's been said and then reposting the result for us to see. Now THAT would be a great learning experience.
Best of luck to you,
Matt
Opening. Didn't dig this at all. First, I didn't really care for the concept. Second, I thought the concept was poorly executed. The first point is a matter of taste, but the second isn't. My feeling is, if you are going to use SFX they really have to work, otherwise, you're better off going a more conventional route. You also used up valuable time that could have been better spent really setting up your story.
I didn't buy the "lab" location. I would have tried to get an actual lab somewhere (like a school). Baring that I might have made a small set in a room and then added in the majority of the "lab" through matte painting in photoshop - just something to think about or experiment with.
As far as the acting goes, hey it is what it is, you do the best you can with the talent that's available. I would have tried to make the characters more believable. After reading your flatliners post, I know the vibe you were going for, however, there was nothing in the story to tell me that and there was really no way to infer it. So that should somehow be addressed, either through a little exposition or visually. Or go for a more straight forward look. Those are tough decisions but when you only have six minutes, sometimes you can't be as creative as you would like.
Lighting. It seems to me that you shot this pretty dark. Doing so renders a certain type of image and, if you like that, keep doing it. I would suggest, however, that you experiment a bit with shooting, bright (but within a five stop range) and then exposing for the basic look you want (using ND filters and aperture) and then fine tuning your look in post. I think you will wind up with a cleaner, more pleasing image with better color. Also, you location, if you wanted to keep using it, begged for some creative lighting. Don't just light your actors, light your background in a way to create depth. So many folks seem to think that DOF (ie., a 35mm adapter) is the only way to create depth in a scene - it isn't. You can use composition and lighting as well. Ultimately using all three in varying amounts is what you should shoot for.
Composition. Much of your framing seems off to me. It's as if you composed for 4:3 instead of 16:9. An example of this is when you have the OTS shot of the girl speaking to one of the researches (2:15). She is framed center, he is just visible frame left and you have a lot of negative space frame right. Instead try filling the frame in such a shot. There are other examples, but I think YOU should go through your film and find them. Of course, you could say that you framed that way for artistic reasons but I personally don't think you're there yet (and neither am I). So focus on understanding and learning the "rules" first - then break them.
Camera movement. Some of it I like, but much of it seemed off due to the composition. I wonder if you story boarded this and planned all of your shots in advance? If not, I would try that next time, I think it would make for a cleaner more polished presentation.
Look. Didn't care for the heavy diffusion. It looks like you just selected a MB present and went with it. I would have tried to achieve more of my look with lighting and then grade the footage a bit more carefully. The stuff that was out of focus really killed it for me. The red elevator was too over the top.
Audio. The audio was good in some spots, not so good in others. I assume you used an on-camera mic for most of this? You should try using a mic on a boom. Also much of the dialog could have been enhanced in post to remove noise. A separate recorder could also help, but that just adds to the budget. The score was ok.
So there it is. Mostly negative I know, but hey, someday you'll get to say the same things to me! On the other hand, it was a neat little short and I liked the ending. I would like to see you rethink this and reshoot it, keeping in mind what's been said and then reposting the result for us to see. Now THAT would be a great learning experience.
Best of luck to you,
Matt
MattC said:
thanks for the comments, lot of stuff we noticed too but under the time constraints we were dealing with due to the location itself, there wont be a reshoot. We did all of this in about three hours before we were kicked out, so it was the best we could do with the time we had. The filter usage is a matter of perspective, some people i have shown like them.