ROM - A film by Ben Sliker and Matthew Bumby
- Thread starter Ben Sliker
- Start date
Ben Sliker
Pain In The Ass 2.0
Man your notes are much cleaner than mine during that process. Mine looks like one legged chicken scratch. Thats why I started doing mind maps so I wouldn't get lost in my own thinking process.
lol. well, that was after many re-writes before that. I'm sure I have pages that have giant scribble and scratch-outs and 'this sucks, start over' written in the corner. If only I could invent a machine that would record my memories ...
Michael Anthony Horrigan
More Cowbell Pictures
Secondary review...
I liked the opening shots but I found the bathroom shot too bright. I know that you were going for the swinging light effect but I can barely make it out. Maybe that's due to the brightness and not enough shadow being cast.
The following shots in the office are great. As is just about everything else that follows.
Sound is great! The music is very fitting as well.
The acting is really solid all around.
I also like the idea behind the story here. I had a bit of trouble with the betrayal theme but I do get it. In a way though it can seem like Oz is doing him a favour. That's what's conflicting for me.
As for his son, I have to ask. How did he drown? He's old enough to be safe in a bathtub. Did he fall and hit his head? If he did I would have liked to have seen a little cut on his head as he pulled him out.
This really looks great all around though. Very good DP.
Love the effects shot at the end with the boy/Oz. That looked pretty cool. Personally I think I would have ended it after that shot and with everything shutting down. Leave a little left to everyone's imagination to take over.
Might have cast a lot of doubt though as well.
Again, I'm really digging the music and sound design on this one. Lots of nice little touches all around. The lead is actor is just great.
I can easily see why you are in the finals with this.
Very solid piece of work.
Best of luck in round 2!
MAH
I liked the opening shots but I found the bathroom shot too bright. I know that you were going for the swinging light effect but I can barely make it out. Maybe that's due to the brightness and not enough shadow being cast.
The following shots in the office are great. As is just about everything else that follows.
Sound is great! The music is very fitting as well.
The acting is really solid all around.
I also like the idea behind the story here. I had a bit of trouble with the betrayal theme but I do get it. In a way though it can seem like Oz is doing him a favour. That's what's conflicting for me.
As for his son, I have to ask. How did he drown? He's old enough to be safe in a bathtub. Did he fall and hit his head? If he did I would have liked to have seen a little cut on his head as he pulled him out.
This really looks great all around though. Very good DP.
Love the effects shot at the end with the boy/Oz. That looked pretty cool. Personally I think I would have ended it after that shot and with everything shutting down. Leave a little left to everyone's imagination to take over.
Might have cast a lot of doubt though as well.
Again, I'm really digging the music and sound design on this one. Lots of nice little touches all around. The lead is actor is just great.
I can easily see why you are in the finals with this.
Very solid piece of work.
Best of luck in round 2!
MAH
MattinSTL
Sound Modulator
This is the one entry that's going to make me go back and compare it to my favorite entries of past fests. I would like to see DVXuser put together a "best of the best" fest... that would simply be done by the management here... and not interfere with the normal fests... (I don't want people to sit out for an extra 3 months for a re-hash of the winners... but I'd like to nominate some flicks of the past that didn't make the top 3 spots... as well as some that did... for a fest-off.)
I'd really like to see how this ranks against the other "bests".
I think this will be a break-through for your production circle.
After watching all my top rated flicks... then watching this one again, I have to adjust their rating... because I can't put them in the same category as this... in good conscience. Using your film to grade on the curve is an assault on second place... quoting Spinal Tap... this one goes to 11.
I'd really like to see how this ranks against the other "bests".
I think this will be a break-through for your production circle.
After watching all my top rated flicks... then watching this one again, I have to adjust their rating... because I can't put them in the same category as this... in good conscience. Using your film to grade on the curve is an assault on second place... quoting Spinal Tap... this one goes to 11.
Ben Sliker
Pain In The Ass 2.0
Cool Mike! I was wondering when my 'secondary review' was coming. Thanks! In-depth thoughts below: (and thanks for giving me topics to discuss) 
I didn't do much color correction for the beginning of the movie. It irks me just a little that some of the highlights got blown out from these shots, the H.264 codec is super sensitive (whereas something like an HPX300 or 500 with a 10-bit codec is going to make those highlights look dreamy) I'll probably go back and tweak here, I don't know if I'm completely satisfied with the yellow-ish thing that's going on in the bathroom.
What can I say, Chris, Joe and Lana rock the hizzy.
I can see how this could be conflicting. I would think that most betrayal stories are ones that feature characters with somewhat linear character arcs. They want the same things throughout. In our story, both Oz and Daniel have a transition (from A to B so to speak). Oz A and Daniel A are both working towards the same thing, but Oz B betrays Daniel A, turning him into Daniel B.
From a 50,000 ft. view, Oz and Daniel are both working towards something 'bad', at the least unnatural: manipulating a memory. Oz decides to turn 'good' and shows Daniel the error of his ways. Is this any different from say, two bank robbers, one's conscience gets the good of him and he turns them both in? He still has betrayed his fellow bank robber.
I think the real task of making a film in under 6 minutes is looking at your story and going 'Ok, what can we leave out and still have this make sense to the audience?' We relied on suspension of disbelief for the audience to believe that 'bathtub+wires+Oz=brain Tivo' and at the same time that Daniel's son has drown. I couldn't tell you how he drown because it's not in the script, we left it out because we didn't think it was important enough to take the time to definitively explain. (For instance, if there was a cut on his head, I'm sure we would have gotten at least 10 'why is there a cut on his head? didn't he drown?' comments.) That being said, he probably swallowed some water and choked, or the tub was too hot and he fainted, or he was seeing how long he could hold his breath underwater. I think any of those would work.
Yep. Jason Rocks. Looking forward to collaborating with him in the future.
As for the end, I considered this with the edit but in the end decided that in no way did I want to open up that can of worms. And I'm all for letting the audience's imaginations play a part in the story, but there's one thing we know we didn't want - to make the audience think that Oz killed himself AND Daniel at the end. So we had to show Daniel alive at the end.
Thanks! You are on a list of DVXusers who I've never been able to completely blow away with my shorts. One of my measuring sticks, per se. I won't be satisfied until I get a 'Dude, your film was f-ing rad." from MAH. he he. (of course, this is based on the assumption that you use the word 'rad') Back to the drawing board!
I didn't do much color correction for the beginning of the movie. It irks me just a little that some of the highlights got blown out from these shots, the H.264 codec is super sensitive (whereas something like an HPX300 or 500 with a 10-bit codec is going to make those highlights look dreamy) I'll probably go back and tweak here, I don't know if I'm completely satisfied with the yellow-ish thing that's going on in the bathroom.
What can I say, Chris, Joe and Lana rock the hizzy.
I can see how this could be conflicting. I would think that most betrayal stories are ones that feature characters with somewhat linear character arcs. They want the same things throughout. In our story, both Oz and Daniel have a transition (from A to B so to speak). Oz A and Daniel A are both working towards the same thing, but Oz B betrays Daniel A, turning him into Daniel B.
From a 50,000 ft. view, Oz and Daniel are both working towards something 'bad', at the least unnatural: manipulating a memory. Oz decides to turn 'good' and shows Daniel the error of his ways. Is this any different from say, two bank robbers, one's conscience gets the good of him and he turns them both in? He still has betrayed his fellow bank robber.
I think the real task of making a film in under 6 minutes is looking at your story and going 'Ok, what can we leave out and still have this make sense to the audience?' We relied on suspension of disbelief for the audience to believe that 'bathtub+wires+Oz=brain Tivo' and at the same time that Daniel's son has drown. I couldn't tell you how he drown because it's not in the script, we left it out because we didn't think it was important enough to take the time to definitively explain. (For instance, if there was a cut on his head, I'm sure we would have gotten at least 10 'why is there a cut on his head? didn't he drown?' comments.) That being said, he probably swallowed some water and choked, or the tub was too hot and he fainted, or he was seeing how long he could hold his breath underwater. I think any of those would work.
Yep. Jason Rocks. Looking forward to collaborating with him in the future.
As for the end, I considered this with the edit but in the end decided that in no way did I want to open up that can of worms. And I'm all for letting the audience's imaginations play a part in the story, but there's one thing we know we didn't want - to make the audience think that Oz killed himself AND Daniel at the end. So we had to show Daniel alive at the end.
Thanks! You are on a list of DVXusers who I've never been able to completely blow away with my shorts. One of my measuring sticks, per se. I won't be satisfied until I get a 'Dude, your film was f-ing rad." from MAH. he he. (of course, this is based on the assumption that you use the word 'rad') Back to the drawing board!
Ben Sliker
Pain In The Ass 2.0
Matt, thank you again for your strong support of ROM. To even be in the same sentence as some of the great films that have been in DVXfests over the years is an honor. I remember being blown away by films like SIMILO, JDS' early shorts, stuff from Timur and Mark Harris, Texas Fortune, etc. It basically sent me one message: 'I've got to step up my game.'
I really have to say thanks to those filmmakers/moderators who paved the way in these festivals. I learned a ton from following their example. Good lord, I sound like an old fart ... 'Remember when they MacGregor made SIMILO? yeah ... had to travel barefoot in the snow ... uphill ... both ways ...' :smile:
Michael Anthony Horrigan
More Cowbell Pictures
I'm actually glad you didn't try and explain it. It was more out of curiosity.
I rated this one quite high so no worries there. Colour me impressed.
Cheers,
MAH
Ben Sliker
Pain In The Ass 2.0
Dang you to heck Horrigan! You know if you ask questions I'm going to give you a stupidly long answer detailing my motivations! :violent5:
*sound of checkmark being scratched next to MAH*
glad to hear i'm not the only one.
Michael Anthony Horrigan
More Cowbell Pictures
:grin:
It's just that people with kids of that age will have a different idea of how he might have come to drown in a bathtub. Holding their breath isn't one of them for me so I'm really glad you left it pretty ambiguous.
A good one would have been giving a sick kid a bath and leaving them alone. Or the kid getting up, slipping and hitting his head. That one I think everyone could buy.
In the end I think it was a smart move to leave it up to us. I like that.
MAH
Rodney V. Smith
DVXFest Promo Guru
Ahh we knew you had it locked up from Frame 1. You ****ing rocked it man. Congrats.
So you coming back for WestFest?
So you coming back for WestFest?
distich
Member
I don't know if Ben is going to but I'm seriously considering it. I've had an idea for a while that might just be hell to film but if it fits the rules then into hell I'll ride...
Rodney V. Smith
DVXFest Promo Guru
Woot! Ride on cowboy!
Chris Messineo
Veteran
Congratulations. This was definitely my favorite film in this fest and one of my all-time favorites as well.
Ben Sliker
Pain In The Ass 2.0
thanks guys! cloud 9 ... cloud 9.
