LOOK AT ME - Sprocketboy
- Thread starter Sprocketboy
- Start date
warau
Active member
To echo everyone else, you did a great job with the cinematography, editing, some cool stuff in there. I know the 6 min limit is tight but I just didn't get to the point that I believed she was upset enough for the glue. More time would have allowed you to get her more amped before the end.
Nice job though, I liked it.
Nice job though, I liked it.
Sprocketboy
Well-known member
I guess I can take that as a compliment. Thanks.
This is exactly what the screenplay writers wanted... your sympathy for Missy. Originally, I intended to have the audience hate her, but quickly realized that it is better to have you like her to make the ending have more impact. It makes the loss of the retainer trivial to what she losses in the end. Thanks.
Cool. Despite the shallow nature of her going nuts over a missing retainer and the fear for her teeth sending her off, it was really quite deep. Really nice cinematography. Really nice sound.
Special thanks for the shot at 5:10.
Special thanks for the shot at 5:10.
jessicalsin
Well-known member
Hehehe.....tragic! I think I knew a girl like that in high school...I wonder if being that she was so superficial she knew that nail polish remover would have dissolved the crazy glue?...Or is that only people like me who've accidentally glued their hand to their face...? Hmmm
Anyway...quite excellent! Your gal was just great!
Anyway...quite excellent! Your gal was just great!
Sprocketboy
Well-known member
Thank you, sir. I appreciate your comment.
You definitely get it. There is more to the ending than what is on the surface. ...and please... you are not the only fan of 5:10.
You had a different take on her, than most of comments I received. But, your final reaction is the one I'm looking for. Thanks.
Sorry, I couldn't do better. I think my chances are better in the next fest. This is my first time entering and I have a good feeling on where to go without changing my sensibilities.
A big thank you for liking our modern day Shakespearean tragedy. I'm sure Rochelle would appreciate your approval of her performance. I certainly approve of your slam dunk performances in Rodney's films.
ZazaCast
Major Contributor
Good flick. Technically, one of the best I've seen so far. The story, good concept but 'missed it by that much'. I never really believed Missy, and to be honest her losing both her boyfriend and retainers was exactly what she deserved!
Loved the look of the bathroom shot @ 4:08
....and I have to go alone with Noel...nice shot @ 5:10!
Congratulation to all involved & I look forward to more from you.
Loved the look of the bathroom shot @ 4:08
....and I have to go alone with Noel...nice shot @ 5:10!
Congratulation to all involved & I look forward to more from you.
Geoff_R
Veteran
Really interesting film here... well executed on many levels. Loved how you played up the superficiality across the entire piece. In the beginning it's as if she just worked out, yoga, etc and then even on that calendar you have a 'consult with plastic surgeon' on the 22nd... and when the bf leaves, it looks like he is going to the gym in an abercrombie shirt I believe. Then you actually feel good for the girl for that moment when she gets the braces off... you find her sweet in those moments... and then she slowly falls deeper and deeper into this strange obsession. Excellent work creating that character and kudos to your actress because she got under my skin with her mannerisms and tone as she grew worse and worse 
chriscurl
Well-known member
I enjoyed this, when I first realized it was superglue in the tube you totally got me, I may have talked to the screen, but I admit nothing. I reviewed a couple pages in here and I am not sure I can add much to both the praise and criticisms already posted, I did completely dig that kitchen transition, good luck, look forward to seeing whats next!
Brian Parker
Well-known member
Wow...very nicely shot...beautiful crisp lighting and imagery, great house and sets and it speaks to modern vanities and superficialities. Good performances too.
You got some verbal responses out of me. Heh heh...when she had the Krazy Glue I was like please let that be some kind of teeth whitener. Also, when she tripped over the bottle I thought she was about to knock her teeth out on the step that the phone was sitting on. Yeesh. I really liked the jump cuts of her crawling across the floor before she got to the retainer case. Very good job on the film Sprocketboy!
You got some verbal responses out of me. Heh heh...when she had the Krazy Glue I was like please let that be some kind of teeth whitener. Also, when she tripped over the bottle I thought she was about to knock her teeth out on the step that the phone was sitting on. Yeesh. I really liked the jump cuts of her crawling across the floor before she got to the retainer case. Very good job on the film Sprocketboy!
Sprocketboy
Well-known member
That bathroom shot was the most heavily color graded out of the entire film. Only, because I wanted it to be dream-like and ethereal as she applies the stuff to her teeth. She is not in her right mind. Thanks.
I guess dirt bags are prevalent from Australia to Upstate NY, 5:10 Fanboy.
Really interesting film here... well executed on many levels. Loved how you played up the superficiality across the entire piece. In the beginning it's as if she just worked out, yoga, etc and then even on that calendar you have a 'consult with plastic surgeon' on the 22nd... and when the bf leaves, it looks like he is going to the gym in an abercrombie shirt I believe. Then you actually feel good for the girl for that moment when she gets the braces off... you find her sweet in those moments... and then she slowly falls deeper and deeper into this strange obsession. Excellent work creating that character and kudos to your actress because she got under my skin with her mannerisms and tone as she grew worse and worse
I'm humbled by your positive commentary, and really appreciate the fact that you followed the character the way I intended. Thanks. Hopefully, I will be able to make a WWII film down the road. Many have been made, but the stories worth telling are countless. TTWC is top-notch and I plan on watching it again and giving a more thorough critique.
Thanks so much, Chris. I greatly appreciate your comment.
One of the hardest things, in that scene to shoot, was kicking the bottle. Our poor actress almost lost her teeth a couple times during those takes. Thanks for the positive praise. Much appreciated.
Rodney V. Smith
DVXFest Promo Guru
I've been back here to comment about 6 times now. Which means that every time I come back, I have to watch your movie.
"Look at Me" exudes perfection out of every single pore. Your actors are perfect, nice skin, clean, well put together... the Barbie Doll Patrol I call them. Even the guys are perfect. Perfect apartment (and clean to the point of obsession), every surface clean and sparkling. Any imperfections are either hidden or obscured in the background. And all of the white SCREAMS of perfection, perfection, perfection. Match that with clean imagery from your camera, almost every thing in perfect focus and you have exactly the image you were going for.
Everything is perfect in her world... except for this one little flaw.
And once that flaw is gone, well with all of this perfection around what do we have left? Ah yes! the chance to ruin it all. We get a good glimpse to that impending ruination by the first look into her purse (and that is one hell of a messy purse), which is then unceremoniusly dumped onto the perfect countertop. This (in my mind) starts the breakdown of her perfect little world.
Doesn;t help that her friend is a complete ***** who wants to take her down a few pegs by telling her how awful she looks. I HATE girls like these by the way, so at this point you haven;t generated an ounce of pity from me. It's more about the delight of seeing that perfect little world come down, one brick at a time.
The following breakdown is a joy to watch, and the cake.. oh the cake and the wine! Such a bad girl. Now she can feel likt eh "fat ugly cow" she's no doubt constantly calling herself.
You shocked me with the supergle, after all, no one could be that stupid could they?
The gradual descent into chaos and madness was perfect. Think I'll go watch it again...
God what a *****!
THe move from steady shots to handheld was brilliant. Great visual communication of what was coming. Everything has broken down now, and we can FEEL it.
You've created the perfect character for us to hate. She's practically inhuman in her perfection and her expectations. She's a Barbie Doll.
Slick film, brilliantly executed. I don't think I have a single complaint about it, except for the fact that there was nothing to like about the girl. A little more human behaviour from her would have created a sympathetic character... but that's not what you were going for was it? No.. not at all.
Brilliant film. Down with the Barbie Dolls!
"Look at Me" exudes perfection out of every single pore. Your actors are perfect, nice skin, clean, well put together... the Barbie Doll Patrol I call them. Even the guys are perfect. Perfect apartment (and clean to the point of obsession), every surface clean and sparkling. Any imperfections are either hidden or obscured in the background. And all of the white SCREAMS of perfection, perfection, perfection. Match that with clean imagery from your camera, almost every thing in perfect focus and you have exactly the image you were going for.
Everything is perfect in her world... except for this one little flaw.
And once that flaw is gone, well with all of this perfection around what do we have left? Ah yes! the chance to ruin it all. We get a good glimpse to that impending ruination by the first look into her purse (and that is one hell of a messy purse), which is then unceremoniusly dumped onto the perfect countertop. This (in my mind) starts the breakdown of her perfect little world.
Doesn;t help that her friend is a complete ***** who wants to take her down a few pegs by telling her how awful she looks. I HATE girls like these by the way, so at this point you haven;t generated an ounce of pity from me. It's more about the delight of seeing that perfect little world come down, one brick at a time.
The following breakdown is a joy to watch, and the cake.. oh the cake and the wine! Such a bad girl. Now she can feel likt eh "fat ugly cow" she's no doubt constantly calling herself.
You shocked me with the supergle, after all, no one could be that stupid could they?
The gradual descent into chaos and madness was perfect. Think I'll go watch it again...
God what a *****!
THe move from steady shots to handheld was brilliant. Great visual communication of what was coming. Everything has broken down now, and we can FEEL it.
You've created the perfect character for us to hate. She's practically inhuman in her perfection and her expectations. She's a Barbie Doll.
Slick film, brilliantly executed. I don't think I have a single complaint about it, except for the fact that there was nothing to like about the girl. A little more human behaviour from her would have created a sympathetic character... but that's not what you were going for was it? No.. not at all.
Brilliant film. Down with the Barbie Dolls!
alex whitmer
Veteran
Good 'ol vanity, One of the 7 deadly sins (is it still 7, or has it gone up?)
This is nicely filmed, and well structured.
I really like how you followed this birth and death of an obsession. What started out as seemingly a routine 'adjustment' becomes a full-blown psychosis.
Actress did a nice job, and I think your film style and the performance were well matched. Cool house too!!
Well done!
aw
www.alexwhitmer.wordpress.com
This is nicely filmed, and well structured.
I really like how you followed this birth and death of an obsession. What started out as seemingly a routine 'adjustment' becomes a full-blown psychosis.
Actress did a nice job, and I think your film style and the performance were well matched. Cool house too!!
Well done!
aw
www.alexwhitmer.wordpress.com
Sprocketboy
Well-known member
Thank you for your detailed critique. And from what I gather... you liked the film. I mean you watched it 6 times.
What's funny... is that your commentary matched the melodramatic tone I was looking for in this story, so I'm very happy it carried through. You must have an agenda when it comes to health club, barbie dolls... well so do I, but I was hoping viewers would in some way feel bad for her. The scenes at the orthodontist's office and in the kitchen before looking in the bag, shows a gitty, happy person, perhaps shallow, but able to display emotions we feel from time to time when things go right. Also, her Reese Witherspoon-ish look helps. Then again, as I said in a previous post, my orginal intention was to make her unlikable to justify the end. My final approach in the directing was to make her somewhat likeable, so as to make the ending a more horrible experience for the viewer. I maybe a little cloudy there. I agree with your assessment and others who commented here.
Thanks again, for watching the film so many times, but I get this funny feeling you are enjoying the fact that she spirals down so hard in the end.
Let's put Mattel out of business.
Sprocketboy
Well-known member
Alex. Great name. That's my name too.
I'm am really happy you liked it. Its always good to get the perspective of a writer, especially one who has experience and success in long form writing and poetry. You encapsulated the story perfectly, "birth and death of an obsession." The retainer was simply a prop. The obsession is the story and vanity is the catalyst. Thanks for comment.
Will Clegg
Veteran
Great film! It really looks and sounds great, and the story was spot on. The only thing I didn't like was the boyfriend's acting... He was a little too OTT for me. But it was a small part and didn't really distract too much. This is one of the best I have seen in the fest - congrats!
Imaginate
Well-known member
I enjoyed watching this character spiral downward. I loved the world that you created for her... so pristine and clean... it reminded me of the movie Gattica. Really cool tracking shot in the kitchen. The sound design was great. I didnt buy the scene of her putting crazy glue in her mouth... the first time i watched it I wasnt sure if she did it by accident or on purpose? To do it by accident seemed unresonable to do it on purpose seemed idiotic... If she had been tripping on some drug and totally out of it... then I could have gone along with it and watched in horror as she did it and then pass out.
This was really fun to watch and also shows your filmmaking talent. Great job
Garnet
This was really fun to watch and also shows your filmmaking talent. Great job
Garnet
Blaine
Mr. Hollywood
This was a fun watch. Superficial California girl? Who would have thought. I loved the Krazy Glue. Nice touch.
It sounded and looked good. The guy reading Vanity Fair, a riot.
It's always nice to see a short that's a complete story. That along with some good acting and you've created something that people will want to watch.
Good job.
It sounded and looked good. The guy reading Vanity Fair, a riot.
It's always nice to see a short that's a complete story. That along with some good acting and you've created something that people will want to watch.
Good job.