First Fest Entry Ever: SECOND CHANCES

armisiano: thanks for spending time to watch and comments. Most of the suggestions are helpful and I'll keep those in mind.

Ryan: thank you and i'm glad you enjoyed it. Really appreciated it!
 
that was nice. interesting concept once again....there are a lot of interesting concepts this fest. anyways, I really liked the opening shots and the whole dreamy color correction, although I felt like it went too far a couple of times. rarely though. nice locations also.

acting was good and camera work was also. nice job sir.
 
Gentlemen: it's time.

Crap, my kid is yelling down the stairs for me. I'll be back to complete this review.

Okay, let's try this agan. Were the three women in masks a representation of the "Furies". They seemed to be deliberately teasing him, provoking him, yet "barred" from touching him.

Some of the composition bothers me on this, especially just dealing with blocking and the visual language. He moves closer on the line "How are we to part..." and the shot is mirroring his intentions... but her subsequent rejection or doubting could have also used a visual indicator but moving her away from him instead of her turning and moving in closer. It woudl have lent a little more believability to her question and given us a visual for when she says "in this place". Great place for a nice wide shot of the entire place and to communicate the distance again, but there was nothing there. Also gives him the opportunity to close the space once again and create some more movement. it's a motivated move.

How much time did you spend on blocking the location if you don;t mind me asking? And just sitting back and watching? The script has all of these visual cues hidden in the language of the dialog, about what we need to see right here, right now and you can only capture that if you're just listening, no script in hand.

Also visually it would have been a better transition shot that the rack focus on the plant. I thought that gravestone may have been important and it's because you were sending us the wrong visual cues.

I like this film and its well made. The story gets a little bogged down in areas though and its becasue you introduce elements like the 3 women and then the mysterious gravestone... but there's no payoff. When you introduce characters like that, who have such strong visual presence, and they're the first thing we see, there needs to be a payoff. I was expecting them to try to thwart him/them in some way, but nothing happened. It just became a melodrama between the man and the woman about choices, metaphorical or otherwise. There was so much more that could have heppened, developing the characters and the environment and I felt a little let down.

Axe the three women, find a better transition that doesn;t send the wrong cue, and you have a much better film already that builds to its dramatic conclusion of choice.

Good job with the production, but some things were out of joint and feels like they were shot becasue they looked cool. Develop those storypoints and if they don;t work, either find a way to make them work, or eject them. A little script development and you guys got it locked and loaded. You already have great production value and you can only add to that.
 
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vnguyen972 said:
Thanks.

Yeah, it wasn't real smooth and most of it I think because of the PVC tracks got dirty and the old wheels...
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Solution for the dirty track (which probably spun round and round) is to get some cross braces and elevate off the ground even by half an inch. I had to keep wiping my tracks down every couple of takes and finally i said "screw it" and did it. Haven't regretted it since. Plus it keeps the tracks a consistent distance.
 
puckthemad, thanks for the detailed comments, they're very helpful to help me get better on the next project!
 
vnguyen972 said:
puckthemad, thanks for the detailed comments, they're very helpful to help me get better on the next project!
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you;ve got a good thing going on and you're rocking the hell out of the HV30. I really wanna see what you guys come up with next, for the fests or otherwise.
 
Ok, plain and simple... I liked the concept... didn't like the script at all... the dialog was ridiculously spot on, and dry.... Maybe you wanted it to seem that way since they were dead? The actors looked "hollywood" and didn't necessarily have "bad" performances, but I felt like the dialog just wasn't there. Technically there were a few issues with the film, but it looked decent... wanted to love this, just couldn't because of the dialog :(

My 2 cents!
 
streetraces said:
It was a pretty snoozefest.
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Dont usually concern myself with what others say - but really unconstructive comments like this really goes against the camaraderie and community feel of DVXuser. This is not youtube.

Sorry Vu, had to get that one off my chest.

Ok. Some points covered that I will merely mention (processed audio, cam sometimes shaky). So next.

Really liked this as a story, the reveal timing was good. I liked the mood, look and feel of the entire short. Really well done. Liked the look of your actors and I think they turned in a good performance. There was some dialogue that just didnt hit it for me. Just as an example of some dialogue that didnt play well for me - starting at 3.14 her starting at "How...".

But a solid effort, some high rating points in there as well - well done.
 
Can't say anything that hasn't already been covered. I have to agree with Brandon's take. Enjoyable but for me, it felt llike a long 6 minutes. Keep up the good work, I look forward to more from you guys!
 
Are the phantom girls supposed to be temptation?

Like the look of the film a lot. Much thought went into the details and the shots. Nice looking cast as well that work great - with what they had.

I think your dialogue leaned too far toward the melodramatic, as well as some redundancy. The delivery and everything was so nice, just the words lacked luster.

Two ghosts trying to resolve unfinished commitments? It's a good idea, but the dialogue was geared toward the living.

You accomplished a lot in one location. Nice economics.

The CU of the eyes hung a little long for my taste. Could have been a nice snap to the shattered face to emphasize the violence of the accident.

Really enjoyed watching this. Very slick and polished look. Beautiful palette of colors.

Excellent music.


Alex
 
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This was your first entry. Good that you got it finished.

I had a hard time with it because of the writing. The minute I saw them in the car (the first time) I knew they were now dead. And this is where I had the problem with the writing. The dialogue seemed to be saying, "We're dead but we're cleaver in the way we talking so we don't come right out and say it but if you're listening you should be able to figure it out." It felt too clever by half.

I also thought the masked characters also played into the same trap as the dialogue.

Your leads were very attractive and pleasant to watch, though.

btw, Did you ADR this because a lot of the dialogue looked like it wasn't sync'd up well?
 
I felt like you had a really nice concept here but it just went a little too over the top, especially in the color grade and the dialogue. I loved your lead actress though, and the photography was very nice - I just wish there was a softer color grade so that it could shine a bit more.

You obviously have some good storytelling skills, and I'm sure that your next effort will be even better. Good stuff.
 
Interesting film. Some things I loved, some not so much.

What's up with the masked girls at the beginning? I thought I was in store for a completely different kind of movie. I would personally axe all that stuff, it looks awesome, and it's super creepy, but I don't think it fits in this story.

The audio was a little distracting, especially the S's.

There were some beautiful images.

SPOILER


When I first saw the eyes close-up, I was like "What?" Then "Whoa" Then "Holy sh!t this is awesome."

The car wreck just looks amazing. The entire last 30 seconds or so, starting with the eyes is just perfection. Really moving and powerful. The music works beautifully.

LOVED the ending. Just wish the beginning wasn't so confusing, and that the meat of the film was a little more concise with more compelling, unique dialogue.
 
After watching this film again I realized I had totally forgotten about phantom girls at the beginning. What was their purpose? And why did two of them kiss? This isn't so much a complaint, they had just totally slipped my mind by the end of the movie and I was wondering why they were there.
 
Brandon, Noel, ZaZa, alex, Blaine, Will Cleg, jasonthewho and spear670, thanks for taking your time to watch it and comment it ... I really appreciated that!

Some of your questions (if any) had already been answered in the thread somewhere on the previous posts...

The masked people really confused everyone and I was afraid about this at the beginning of the production because it was really hard to put them in this 6 min and successfully told their stories. The script was part of a bigger script and the masked figures play a very important role in the story but yeah... it wasn't just not wise to introduce them without the explanation why or what... and I was trying to use the visual scenes to explain it but i guess it didn't come off quite right for most viewers!!! Its a failure... hopefully I'll learn that and be better on the next time!!!

Thanks again.
 
Second Chances was one of the first films I watched in the fest, so I'm sorry I'm just now giving my feedback on it... I just wanted to say that I really liked the look you had going on in this movie! How much was with an 35mm adapter and how much was it shot with the HV30 naked?

Enough with the technical questions! I pretty much agree with jasonthewho comments on the last portion of the movie:

jasonthewho said:
The car wreck just looks amazing. The entire last 30 seconds or so, starting with the eyes is just perfection. Really moving and powerful. The music works beautifully.

LOVED the ending.
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I liked the girls with the masks on in the beginning as well, unlike some of the others who've reviewed Second Chances. I thought they were very David Lynchian. The first half of the movie could be shaved a little, because it felt almost too melodramatic, but with that said I really liked the movie and it's one of my favs of the fest!

Good work

Ryan Jackson
 
Hi Ryan, thanks for taking the time to come back and comment it... I greatly appreciated it!

To answer your question, the short was shot entirely with HV30 + Handy35 adapter...

I'm glad you enjoyed it, the whole thing was a great experience!!
 
my summary: the delivery was not well executed.
Also, the actors did not make me feel it. the lines were weak and average.
The crane shot over the gate, let's just say I would of left that one out, or fixed it during post.
I enjoyed the color, the feel, and everything else.
oh wait!!! the blink of an eye switching to the other scene I did not like at all.
The scene with the accident setup I did not like at all.
And what I disliked the most was the fact that the whole time I knew they were dead talking, it didn't catch me off guard.
Thanks for your time and efforts in creating this movie, it brings a lot to learn for us, specially for me.
--Luis
 
I don't know, none of the imagery made sense to me. It was overly melodramatic, but not dramatic. The consept is nice, and the production quality was up, but I would have preferred a lot more focus on the acting and the dialogue. It felt like an M. Night style movie where he down plays the actors and expects to get everything out of his shot layouts. Keep cracking away, I look forward to seeing what else you guys have coming.
 
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