Deceivers
- Thread starter Mike@AF
- Start date
Richard J. Johnson
Joystick Member
Great film!! Acting was stellar on all parts. Blood and muzzle flash was spot on. Man, I can't say anything bad at all. Great job. wow.
RodThompson
Veteran
MUCHO GUSTO GNARLY ESPRESSO!!!
Good film, and awesome use of DoF in certain parts. Gotta love it when a plan comes together.
Good film, and awesome use of DoF in certain parts. Gotta love it when a plan comes together.
Homunculus
Carbonite Member
this was pretty good. the acting was slightly on the campier side but the edits and directing was very good as were the special effects
MrSeth
Well-known member
My critique for Deceivers
The story:
Very very good.. so much betrayal... i love it! The ending was a nice touch
The acting:
Everyone's acting was believable. I liked the lead actress... very pretty and her acting shined
The camerawork:
The tight shots really helped make it very suspenseful. I liked how you started from the tights, gave us some wides in the middle but went back to the tights.. Great angle choices!
The editing:
Loved the beginning touch with the sound effects before we cut to the story. You introduced us into the action well. Editing was at the perfect pace.
The sound and music:
Music was amazing! No complaints... it helped tell the story. The dialogue was very crisp clear.
Overall impression:
I was glued in from the first minute. Thank you for showing us this film - amazing!
My favorite shot:
The story:
Very very good.. so much betrayal... i love it! The ending was a nice touch
The acting:
Everyone's acting was believable. I liked the lead actress... very pretty and her acting shined
The camerawork:
The tight shots really helped make it very suspenseful. I liked how you started from the tights, gave us some wides in the middle but went back to the tights.. Great angle choices!
The editing:
Loved the beginning touch with the sound effects before we cut to the story. You introduced us into the action well. Editing was at the perfect pace.
The sound and music:
Music was amazing! No complaints... it helped tell the story. The dialogue was very crisp clear.
Overall impression:
I was glued in from the first minute. Thank you for showing us this film - amazing!
My favorite shot:
pborghee
Active member
Very nice! I love the twist and to be honest didnt even see it coming. The only thing i can complain about and it may not be big for anyone else, i thought the shots were alittle too close and tight. I saw no depth and it just felt like there wasnt much room. But just my thought and other then that i loved the speical effects and loevd the acting. Plus the main chick is quite easy to watch haha. Good job man congrats.
Chris_Keaton
ScriptFEST Mod
Nice Film! I'm starting to think that my twist within a twist isn't going to be so unique. Well these are all betrayals, so we can kinda see them coming.
Very well done, particularly for a single location piece. I think you packed the most betrayal into 6 minutes out of all the films I’ve seen. I really liked the intro, hearing the struggle without seeing anything. Definitely builds the tension well.
At the end, I felt the final twist with Michelle was unneeded, a little over the top. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think it would have worked just as well without that line. While I appreciate the colouring, and think it was well done, it didn’t really suit me for this film. It seemed to bright for a rather dark piece. The acting felt a little weak in the first part, but seemed to get better as it went on.
[FONT="]Overall, I felt it was a good story packed into a tight location. Only shooting in the apartment really added to the claustrophobia of the film. I also liked the music, it worked very well. Thanks for putting this up.[/FONT]
. I really liked the intro, hearing the struggle without seeing anything. Definitely builds the tension well. At the end, I felt the final twist with Michelle was unneeded, a little over the top. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think it would have worked just as well without that line. While I appreciate the colouring, and think it was well done, it didn’t really suit me for this film. It seemed to bright for a rather dark piece. The acting felt a little weak in the first part, but seemed to get better as it went on.
[FONT="]Overall, I felt it was a good story packed into a tight location. Only shooting in the apartment really added to the claustrophobia of the film. I also liked the music, it worked very well. Thanks for putting this up.[/FONT]
Christopher Blake
Active member
Twists and turns galore! I must be getting slow cause I didn't see some of them coming.
The only thing, and is minor, that took me out of the film was the blood squirt when the wifey bought it. But only because I knew what to look for.
Overall I really enjoyed it. Great work!
The only thing, and is minor, that took me out of the film was the blood squirt when the wifey bought it. But only because I knew what to look for.
Overall I really enjoyed it. Great work!
John LaBonney
Well-known member
I liked this film a lot.
One thing that really grabbed me was the sounds of the struggle at the beginning. And finally the gunshot. I was drawn in right away.
When Michelle knocks on the door, I feel there's a shot missing--I think that the sequence should end with a shot of her looking at the door as it closes, with a quizzical or semi-frustrated look on her face.
I like the betrayal in this film, and didn't see it coming at all. Good acting, good cinematography, and a good score.
Julie died well. I liked it along with the wimper from the guy.
I agree that the last twist with Michelle probably wasn't necessary.
Good job!
One thing that really grabbed me was the sounds of the struggle at the beginning. And finally the gunshot. I was drawn in right away.
When Michelle knocks on the door, I feel there's a shot missing--I think that the sequence should end with a shot of her looking at the door as it closes, with a quizzical or semi-frustrated look on her face.
I like the betrayal in this film, and didn't see it coming at all. Good acting, good cinematography, and a good score.
Julie died well. I liked it along with the wimper from the guy.
I agree that the last twist with Michelle probably wasn't necessary.
Good job!
Chris Messineo
Veteran
Great looking film. I really dug the way you opened with the sounds of struggle and a gun shot - it pulled me right into the world. You packed a lot of story into six minutes - lots of twists - this was a lot of fun. Well done.
Tunnelmen
Active member
I too liked the audio lead in. I thought that the IPhone App was kinda funny for transferring the money. Turns out that there is an "App for that". I thought that it was well done overall but I think the theme really bottlenecks a lot storys into being double\triple crossed lovers and one shooting another and so on. Having said that, doing it for the money (esp the IPHONE app) made it different from others. Good Job
stinkpot
Well-known member
Way to go Mike! I like your film. Really good use of the time... pacing wasn't too rushed and you told a lot in 6 minutes (something I had trouble with this time around). Your audio worked well... especially like the intro audio transitions.
I would have liked to have seen a few more master/wider shots in there for orientation of scene but not a big deal. The staging was a little cramped for my taste and I think it take the advantage away from the GH1 since you don't have much background field to blur out. Color was a little too vibrant for me in this one as well.
Overall, great short film man! Good twists and the actors did a fine job. Congrats to you and your team.
I would have liked to have seen a few more master/wider shots in there for orientation of scene but not a big deal. The staging was a little cramped for my taste and I think it take the advantage away from the GH1 since you don't have much background field to blur out. Color was a little too vibrant for me in this one as well.
Overall, great short film man! Good twists and the actors did a fine job. Congrats to you and your team.
Thanks! Yes, she's a great actress. Third time working with her and hope it won't be the last. She's a keeper.
Thanks... glad you liked it still even with the expected twists.
Very well done, particularly for a single location piece. I think you packed the most betrayal into 6 minutes out of all the films I’ve seen
At the end, I felt the final twist with Michelle was unneeded, a little over the top. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think it would have worked just as well without that line. While I appreciate the colouring, and think it was well done, it didn’t really suit me for this film. It seemed to bright for a rather dark piece. The acting felt a little weak in the first part, but seemed to get better as it went on.
Overall, I felt it was a good story packed into a tight location. Only shooting in the apartment really added to the claustrophobia of the film. I also liked the music, it worked very well. Thanks for putting this up.
Thanks! Interesting thought on Michelle not coming back. Originally she wasn't going to, but the actress (EDIT: her name is Caroline Buss) suggested she come back. I thought about it and made it an even bigger role with her being involved with Brandon. I really liked the extra twist because I thought it would be more unexpected and work well for this fest particularly.
Thanks! Yeah, it was done digitally in post and very quickly with short turnaround by Nate Caauwe. natecow.com He does really good work. If you need vfx check out his reel.
I thought about that when writing it, but I didn't want to get away from Julie. It would have made it difficult for her to be surprised by Brandon when she closes the door. It may have also made Michelle coming back at the end more predictable if more focus was put on her earlier on. So instead I had her slightly frantic and trying to get a look at what was going on inside. She's supposed to be worried about Brandon, but I directed her to still play it mostly like a concerned neighbor so as to make the ending more unpredictable.
Thanks! Glad you all like the opening. I love doing stuff like that. Sound is such an important part of films.
My original thought was to have a computer. But that would have been too big and difficult to use and shoot. So I opted for the phone. And yes, there are apps that banks have on the iPhone. Looks like we have a trend going with the "app for that" on our two films in this fest.
Thanks.
I stayed away from wide shots for a few reasons.
1) I typically don't like real wide shots. I know I'm different on this than others.
2) My apartment isn't the best location for shooting. It's small and bland with white walls. The kitchen measures something like 5ft by 3ft. Super small and cramped, so difficult to get far enough back for wide shots. We even did cheat some of them to get as wide as I did.
3) My widest angle lens at the moment is only 35mm. I've got a 28mm on the way and looking for a good deal on the 21mm. Hopefully I'll have them for the next film.
Thanks everyone for watching the film and for your comments and feedback.
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