Web Series: Ama Daga
- Thread starter greeches
- Start date
Chris Adler
Veteran
I'm not an "everything-shot-with-super-shallow-DOF" fan-boy, so a lot of the imagery felt cliche and I thought a deeper focus could have served the story better in some places.
Music was consistent, but sometimes really felt off. Music set the tone of mischief or playfulness at times where it was wrong.
But, I have a huge problem with your pacing. That 10 minute scene could have taken maybe 1 or 2 minutes. Your dragging it out just made me skip forward minute by minute, surprised to notice that he's still doing the same thing he was a minute ago.
Music was consistent, but sometimes really felt off. Music set the tone of mischief or playfulness at times where it was wrong.
But, I have a huge problem with your pacing. That 10 minute scene could have taken maybe 1 or 2 minutes. Your dragging it out just made me skip forward minute by minute, surprised to notice that he's still doing the same thing he was a minute ago.
Snapper123
Well-known member
This is something you don't see everyday! My favorite shots were the macro shots in the intro of the rocks and of his fingertips and the cloth bobbing in the water, I felt like those specific shots had the best white balance, the best texture, and the best tone that represented what this episode truly seemed to evoke. There's also a shot only seconds later where he's just woken up and he's kneeling down, gulping water with his hands, and this specific shot both has the huge sun flare and a very retro texture to the feel at the same time, like some sort of weird glass was used - I loved that look as well and it truly set it apart from an online DSLR episode. Other than those shots though, I want to say that the white balance seemed pretty inconsistent (some of the shots were dark grey/green, some where bright orange, ect ect) and while this was probably done in different shots to represent different times of day, or simply different glass was possibly used, I felt like it would have been better if everything looked more like the opening shots with his fingers and such - those seemed to have a very interesting tone and bit of a retro film color. Half of the shots in this video would have passed for true aged film or even a modern film with a great tinge.
The 2nd half though seemed to fall more near what usually happens with DSLR videos - too much reality, too little character to the glass or scene, odd white balance (especially orange ones), and especially the shots where the guy's back is facing the viewer, mainly the forest scenes, the DSLR tone really becomes just plain opposite to how the video seemed to start off. It seems like so much work was put into the intro, with the great tone, great color, great character, and even the bugs crawling on his fingers and toes, with so much dedication to the macro shots and the cloth and fingers bobbing in the water, but as it progresses to the shots after he stands up, it seems to feel from every point more like a small student film, with the music just getting a little more quirky, the actions being a little too extended, and the video overall just getting to favor those quirky camcorder videos plastered all over Youtube. Ending it with the grave/treasure find, it begins to really and truly even storyline wise feel a little too flamboyant and comedic, where as the first half of the episode perfectly felt like a preserved artifact, a true eye to nature, quite like an older film-based nature documentary but better.
If this were an episode that was very important as an opener, I would honestly and truly suggest cutting a few minutes (I love the whole intro, but the first time that it gets to feel drawn out is when he's on his back and his tongue is lapping for water - seems to happen just too many times.), seeing if you can play with the white balance a bit better in post, possibly adding some sort of (very natural looking) effect to the shots that just don't look as charactered as the majority, and even cut the video in half, with the ending simply being the fact that the man wakes up. I don't really know where the series is headed, but I will say that I just feel like the 2nd figure running in the woods and the whole grave/treasure/map storyline seems very unrealistic compared to how gritty, natural, and downright filmic and serious the opening shots seem to be. The thing is, I loved the first half so entirely much that I gotta say it outshines the 2nd half tremendously. But if you're happy with the direction it's going in, do only what's good to you. Just, don't fall victim to being too proud of your own hard work to see what possibilities are out there, don't stop unless it turned out exactly how you saw it in your head.
Oh also, I pick at this a bunch but I'd say improve the text in the beginning, to me, both the font and the words said seem to too extremely much of a budget look and feel, if text has to be there, I'd say something has to be done to make it more in line with a truly cinematic look for font, and for what's being said, it may be better just to let the audience learn what's up through the storyline. It sure would be neat to have this series make you think it's set in like the 1400's with Indian tribes, only to pop out and say it's really year 2030 or so. But with the text in the beginning, it just seems to give to much away for my tastes. And again, especially the font, both the Ama Daga title and the intro story words have such fonts that would never, ever be used in a studio film. Again, though, do what is great for your story.
If you don't mind me asking:
-What white balance/picture style settings/lens did you use for the 1:02-1:45 shots? These shots are amazing and so interesting in tone, color, and feel, I'd have never guessed they were from a DSLR. Amazing white balance work and good shooting weather I'm guessing.
-And for the 1:50-2:35 shots, I absolutely love these shots too, so mysterious and interesting in both the camera movement, tone, and feel. I'd love to know any tips for this!
-The 3:25-3:55 mark really redeems itself too, I think it has a magnificent character to this passage and I'm truly wondering how this look as accomplished - no need to tell all the secrets, but I'd love some tips if you have any!
The 2:35 mark is really where I think this video starts going negative though, with the 2:37 shot seemingly breaking the feel entirely in exchange for a super-orange, it's-really-too-bright-outside-to-pull-this-shot-off type of deal and for future reference, I think whatever you applied to your color style during 1:00-2:35 is simply amazing, I'd truly experiment more in that root if I were you! I'm betting that every negative to this video is more in trying to accomplish this shoot in all times of the day, rather than spreading it out, and it sort of falling victim to a few post-work quirks like text and music, other than than, the camera work and character was amazing for the most part and I'm truly glad I watched this!
The 2nd half though seemed to fall more near what usually happens with DSLR videos - too much reality, too little character to the glass or scene, odd white balance (especially orange ones), and especially the shots where the guy's back is facing the viewer, mainly the forest scenes, the DSLR tone really becomes just plain opposite to how the video seemed to start off. It seems like so much work was put into the intro, with the great tone, great color, great character, and even the bugs crawling on his fingers and toes, with so much dedication to the macro shots and the cloth and fingers bobbing in the water, but as it progresses to the shots after he stands up, it seems to feel from every point more like a small student film, with the music just getting a little more quirky, the actions being a little too extended, and the video overall just getting to favor those quirky camcorder videos plastered all over Youtube. Ending it with the grave/treasure find, it begins to really and truly even storyline wise feel a little too flamboyant and comedic, where as the first half of the episode perfectly felt like a preserved artifact, a true eye to nature, quite like an older film-based nature documentary but better.
If this were an episode that was very important as an opener, I would honestly and truly suggest cutting a few minutes (I love the whole intro, but the first time that it gets to feel drawn out is when he's on his back and his tongue is lapping for water - seems to happen just too many times.), seeing if you can play with the white balance a bit better in post, possibly adding some sort of (very natural looking) effect to the shots that just don't look as charactered as the majority, and even cut the video in half, with the ending simply being the fact that the man wakes up. I don't really know where the series is headed, but I will say that I just feel like the 2nd figure running in the woods and the whole grave/treasure/map storyline seems very unrealistic compared to how gritty, natural, and downright filmic and serious the opening shots seem to be. The thing is, I loved the first half so entirely much that I gotta say it outshines the 2nd half tremendously. But if you're happy with the direction it's going in, do only what's good to you. Just, don't fall victim to being too proud of your own hard work to see what possibilities are out there, don't stop unless it turned out exactly how you saw it in your head.
Oh also, I pick at this a bunch but I'd say improve the text in the beginning, to me, both the font and the words said seem to too extremely much of a budget look and feel, if text has to be there, I'd say something has to be done to make it more in line with a truly cinematic look for font, and for what's being said, it may be better just to let the audience learn what's up through the storyline. It sure would be neat to have this series make you think it's set in like the 1400's with Indian tribes, only to pop out and say it's really year 2030 or so. But with the text in the beginning, it just seems to give to much away for my tastes. And again, especially the font, both the Ama Daga title and the intro story words have such fonts that would never, ever be used in a studio film. Again, though, do what is great for your story.
If you don't mind me asking:
-What white balance/picture style settings/lens did you use for the 1:02-1:45 shots? These shots are amazing and so interesting in tone, color, and feel, I'd have never guessed they were from a DSLR. Amazing white balance work and good shooting weather I'm guessing.
-And for the 1:50-2:35 shots, I absolutely love these shots too, so mysterious and interesting in both the camera movement, tone, and feel. I'd love to know any tips for this!
-The 3:25-3:55 mark really redeems itself too, I think it has a magnificent character to this passage and I'm truly wondering how this look as accomplished - no need to tell all the secrets, but I'd love some tips if you have any!
The 2:35 mark is really where I think this video starts going negative though, with the 2:37 shot seemingly breaking the feel entirely in exchange for a super-orange, it's-really-too-bright-outside-to-pull-this-shot-off type of deal and for future reference, I think whatever you applied to your color style during 1:00-2:35 is simply amazing, I'd truly experiment more in that root if I were you! I'm betting that every negative to this video is more in trying to accomplish this shoot in all times of the day, rather than spreading it out, and it sort of falling victim to a few post-work quirks like text and music, other than than, the camera work and character was amazing for the most part and I'm truly glad I watched this!
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