The.............?

Richard J. Johnson

Richard J. Johnson

Joystick Member
The crew that never shows.
The fact that I am now the crew.
The pissed off wife that hates the fact that our bedroom is now a set.
The 3 year daughter who screams "Daddy" in the middle of a great take.
The Noise my floor makes that is amplified 10 fold when the boom is recording.
The Lighting is not consistent...Again.
The lead actor is late...Again.
The bulb just blew and B&H is 4 hours away.
The Auto Reel Lock is back.
The "Dammit I forgot to charge the Batteries" speech again.
The "Dammit I forgot to turn on the adapter" speech again.
The edit just does not look right.
The script is in sitting on the table in the shot. how did i miss that?
The Joy of getting the perfect scene.
The Joy of getting the perfect sound.
The pain of starting the next projet.
The pain of ending this one.
 
The director who wants the set walls 13' high.

The DP who wants them 15' high.

The production designer who wants them 18' high.

The carpenters who keep mumbling about material coming in 4'x8'
modules.

The UPM who keeps demanding the set be cut.
 
The stress of doing it all yourself
The AD who is always knocking stuff over
The money is spent
The fact that I just don't have the coverage
The AC is ruining my shots
The "why Did I not buy that HD monitor" thought.again
The reason I am doing this is because....?
The fact that I am a film maker
The people that can't take that from me.
 
Capt Quirk said:
The actresses that don't understand the principle of "the casting couch"
Click to expand...

-The confusion wondering, what the hell is a casting couch? :grin:

-The actor who desides he doesn't want to show up to shoot.
-The camera man who can keep the pan movement steady except the one damn time that we only have one chance to get a take.
-The script that blows off the table and skirts across the cement in the middle of a good take making a scratching noise in the background of the audio.
-The wind that picks up right as we start our exterior shots.
-The battery that doesn't last for sh!t.
-The thread that causes me to realize all the crap that happens to me (this one.)
 
filthrich said:
The lead actor is late...Again.
Click to expand...

ConspiracyPenguin said:
-The actor who desides he doesn't want to show up to shoot.
Click to expand...

Okay, seriously? I'm an actor primarily and I am NEVER late for ANYTHING. I show up at LEAST 15 minutes early to any shoot, rehearsal, live performance call time, etc. If an actor is ever late, never cast them again, seriously. They need to stop taking business away from the talented actors out there who are actually professional in nature.

(on that note, hey, need an actor? :D )
 
armisiano said:
Okay, seriously? I'm an actor primarily and I am NEVER late for ANYTHING. I show up at LEAST 15 minutes early to any shoot, rehearsal, live performance call time, etc. If an actor is ever late, never cast them again, seriously. They need to stop taking business away from the talented actors out there who are actually professional in nature.

(on that note, hey, need an actor? :D )
Click to expand...

Haha. I am an actor too (writer/actor) and I had the lead role in my film, but my friend who isn't really an actor (they are hard to come by waaaay out here) wanted to help out and lost interest since we weren't shooting a comedy.
 
The client who won't get off his cell phone and let us roll.
The director who knee-jerkedly (new word) lets the agency art director look through the lens when the whole spot was the writer's idea.
The account guy who won't act like he's been on set before and keep his %$*^ mouth shut.
The kraft services lady who runs out of Pop Tarts.

Man, I miss those days.
 
I don't see any reason why Art Directors shouldn't look through viewfinders.

Although it's true that we're usually satisfied with the video tap.
 
The producer who doesn't respond for two weeks even just to say, yes, he received the script.
The producer who finally does respond with only their "notes" and nothing good to say.
The lighting guy who thinks he "co-directed" the film because he had a suggestion for a line read.
 
Sad Max said:
I don't see any reason why Art Directors shouldn't look through viewfinders.

Although it's true that we're usually satisfied with the video tap.
Click to expand...

I have no problem with the AD looking through the VF (although I was referring to the ad agency AD and not the set AD, but you're welcome to do it, too :) ). I just hate the assumption that the writer has no idea/input to give on a shot. I mean, if a director wants to snub everyone from the agency, fine. :) Just don't be selective about it.
 
-The fake blood that just doesn't look realistic.
-The fact that everybody looks at you sideways when you joke that real blood already looks realistic.

-The poorly lit greenscreen.
-The grumpy compositor, which is you. (note: see above)

-The script that's too short.
-The script that's now too long.

-The community who shares your pain.
-The message board that sparks/ rekindles your love of filmmaking.
 
The person who forgets who is directing the film and wants to argue and debate and waste everyones time when they shouldn't even be concerned in the first place.
 
TC said:
-The fake blood that just doesn't look realistic.
-The fact that everybody looks at you sideways when you joke that real blood already looks realistic.

-The poorly lit greenscreen.
-The grumpy compositor, which is you. (note: see above)

-The script that's too short.
-The script that's now too long.

-The community who shares your pain.
-The message board that sparks/ rekindles your love of filmmaking.
Click to expand...

The way you just read my mind.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top