The Letter: Short Film

chrismagicc

chrismagicc

Well-known member
A short film I shot, cut, color graded etc...for school. What are your thoughts, what could be better?
I want to enter this into film festivals, and i am looking for some in depth critique.
btw Im only 16 :)

hope you enjoy!

http://vimeo.com/12092445

password: test
 
I like the cut at 04:10. Did you shoot with a flat picture style (just because the faces look a bit dull in some scenes)?
For a school project and being 16 years old, this is outstanding! Keep going, you have a sense of telling stories.
 
stip said:
I like the cut at 04:10. Did you shoot with a flat picture style (just because the faces look a bit dull in some scenes)?
Click to expand...

yes you are correct, with the combination of the high iso I had to use, (no light!) and the marvel cine picture style, the skin tone detail was somehow lost...
i only use marvel cine for wide landscape type shots now and neutral setting has become my new favorite because of marvel cines odd curve screwing up the skin tones...
 
chrismagicc said:
A short film I shot, cut, color graded etc...for school. What are your thoughts, what could be better?
I want to enter this into film festivals, and i am looking for some in depth critique.
btw Im only 16 :)

hope you enjoy!

http://vimeo.com/12092445

password: test
Click to expand...



Great footage. You have a talent for this and do not let anyone tell you otherwise. I think this is a story that many people can relate too.......


When you have a chance post the tech side of things.
 
Interested in the technical stuff aswell. What ISO in the car scenes at night, and did you clean up noise in post? The dialogue outside sounded really pure, was it dubbed?
 
here's the technical stuff!
basically this project was a technical disaster!!
AUDIO:
For audio during the morning scene we used the zoom h4n (a friends) and an old sony boom mic! unfortunately when I synced the takes, one take had a super loud buzzing, not only that but the boom mic chord was hitting the boom pole....
a couple of the lines sarah says, are dubbed and i added an equalizer to try to match them with the original good audio...so for that morning scene I had half the audio working! I would have cut the morning scene completely differently if the audio was working, but with the combination of continuity errors and such, i did my best haha!

For the rest of the short, we used an audio technica boom mic attached to my edirol r-09. This came from the hospital scene, where we had major audio problems as my other group member didnt mic the actors close enough causing us to pump the gain in post....

all other audio, atmosphere, footsteps etc was found off freesound.org

VIDEO:
this unfortunately was also a complete mess. I used my trusty t2i throughout (except for the bus scene which was a friends 7d). It was great! I kept my shutter at 50, used some nds to expose etc.

lenses used: kit lens, nikon 50mm f1.4, sigma 30mm f1.4, canon ef 10-22mm f3.5-4.5. (all my friends lenses except for the kit and nikon)

most of the short was naturally lit.
the letter writing scene of the dolly in was a fun one. I used my diy dolly and our school supplied us with two, not three lowel 250watt hair lights...poop... I did my best hiding them etc, but they just dont output enough

for the hospital, i used the two lowels again, one was on the right side of the curtain, out of frame. This exposed the main actors face and acted as a hair light (its formal use) but created harsh shadows etc. The other light was setup to the left of the camera, near the wall to expose the main actors friend. This also created shadows etc (btw i used a blue gel in front of that lowel to change the color temp to 3200k blah blah blah. But all in all its still sucked!, I had nothing to put in the blank white walls and the shadows were really distracting.

when he picks up the letter, that scene was also a huge pain! For some reason, the apartment we used to shoot, was the only one without an overhead light. I was working with literally NO LIGHT! i had to bump up the iso to a cringing 3200....

but whatever, im only in highschool anyways haha! some softboxes and or coollights/kino's would have been great! and some higher wattage hard lights, maybe a couple 750watt etc.

ACTORS:
the actors were just friends/classmates...not really actors obviously :) the director, dylan redford (yes he is a redford) because they looked mature etc.

More feedback?
I was hoping i could get some more feedback on the actual story, script as mr dylan r. was hoping to get some too :)

thanks again guys
 
Chrismagicc:

I enjoyed your film very much... it moved me.

Everything looked well lit and sharp.

My only complaint is the shakey cam footage of the guy talking to the girl. I get nauseous with shakey cam footage, and there was no need for shakey cam for that scene.

I look forward to more of your stuff. You make me happy I have the t2i.
 
berylium said:
Chrismagicc:

I enjoyed your film very much... it moved me.

Everything looked well lit and sharp.

My only complaint is the shakey cam footage of the guy talking to the girl. I get nauseous with shakey cam footage, and there was no need for shakey cam for that scene.

I look forward to more of your stuff. You make me happy I have the t2i.
Click to expand...

thanks for the critique berylium! the shaky cam is too shaky, but its what the director wanted...and this was a zero budget film so....
 
Very decent work. My only issue with it was the constant piano music which I found to be fairly generic, but that's really just my personal taste talking there. On the whole it was well done. Good job.
 
ooh nice work Chris! When I was your age I didn't know what a camera was. I'm into gangsta blood drenching movies but your movie was cute and has a message. :)
 
My only complaints were the shaky cam as well and after the friend took the yogurt and was eating it, it was back on the table unopened in a few shots.......not a huge deal, but it stood out. All in all good job though.
 
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Chris, what's your preferred method for framing for the crop? Do you mark your screen/monitor? Do you adjust in post?
 
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