Rezfactor--"Runway" [working title] Production Notes Thread
- Thread starter Ralph Oshiro
- Start date
VersuS
Veteran
Ok I'll start with the story, it's very complex (if there even is a specific story). It didnt really bother me to be honest, but it would be nice if I knew what the story was while watching....I can make many guesses but still....
In terms of cinematography and editing this one is amongst the top of the field. Very professional work. The images are crisp and clear and steady and you have a great way to frame things and people....
Those establishing shots and airports and stuff, dont know how you got to make them but well done!!!!!
THe girl was quite ok, not that she had a difficult part but still she managed....the only thing I didnt like was her jogging...maybe this is how girls jog but i thought she was in slow motion, like dont let the breeze mess my hair...that sort of thing...
Anyway, very very good camera work and images! AH! The sound/score...well nothing special but they worked so that's a good thing!
In terms of cinematography and editing this one is amongst the top of the field. Very professional work. The images are crisp and clear and steady and you have a great way to frame things and people....
Those establishing shots and airports and stuff, dont know how you got to make them but well done!!!!!
THe girl was quite ok, not that she had a difficult part but still she managed....the only thing I didnt like was her jogging...maybe this is how girls jog but i thought she was in slow motion, like dont let the breeze mess my hair...that sort of thing...
Anyway, very very good camera work and images! AH! The sound/score...well nothing special but they worked so that's a good thing!
khmuse
Tech Guru
RUNWAY
This one is both easy and hard to review at the same time. Much about this film can be described as nearly perfect. With near perfection comes an interesting burden, namely that errors, even extremely small ones become more obvious as they contrast with the otherwise perfect elements around them.
Normally, really pretty and super clean shots don't do it for me for a horror genre. Typically as soon as I see a film with a bunch of daytime exterior shots, I am disappointed as it seems to scream low effort, lack of skill or both. That being said, Ralph has in most every shot overcome this curse by choosing locations and time of day that works to set a mood. Nothing worse than mid day sun to kill the mood of a horror film, for me it just doesn't work to set a tone. Here Ralph has shown that there are exceptions to this. His choice of shots (most of them at least) were not out of a lack of effort or experience, rather, he seemed to chose them to make the most of his subject, keeping her images very flattering (not that she isn't a natural beauty already). The use of a lot of "golden hour" shots was the only way to pull off these types of shots, and while I like the lounge chair visual, I would have preferred that these too be at a different time of day (an awesome sunset in high contrast silhouette would have been my choice for this one). I realize that this would have pushed the number of shooting days, but this is really one of the very few areas that could have been a bit better. Not an error by any stretch, just a choice that could have been better in my opinion.
As for the gore shots, they were good, but not great. I liked that they were quick, its better to give a glimpse and let the mind do the rest, particularly when not executed to perfection (which would have required an excellent effect make up person to pull off).
I don't want to approached this with a "Brandonesque" style of bulleted, one liners of each category, that just doesn't come across as anything other than a knee jerk proclamation, not enough substance nor value for me. My comment on the directing was that based upon the story it could be best described as a second unit feel, not direction in the classic sense. This is not a criticism, just an observation of what came across. I can't tell from this how good of director Ralph is (but I suspect a hell of a lot better than I am), there just wasn't much to direct.
The acting was acceptable except for the hooded killer. This didn't work for me, nothing was terrifying about this person. The scream were also a bit weak, a better performance here could have helped to make the event more terrifying. On the audio front, the score and sounds were expertly crafted into the story with one very minor exception. The places where the jet engine noise were added were panned hard right, I think this would have been better if they were fully filled across the audio landscape.
Story, what there was of it, wasn't bad. I am so happy that Ralph didn't resort to cliché techniques like a corny voice over or some other band aide solution. Rather, this is a visual story and a wonderful executed one at that.
I recall following Ralph's debate over which camera to purchase. His choice in shooting style and use of locations and minimalistic lighting proves that he choose very well indeed. I am a big fan of 2/3" high end SD cameras, they do so many things well, and for this type of film, anything less would have diminished the result.
So, in conclusion, this film shows a large improvement as a filmmaker in terms of telling a story. Congratulations!
This one is both easy and hard to review at the same time. Much about this film can be described as nearly perfect. With near perfection comes an interesting burden, namely that errors, even extremely small ones become more obvious as they contrast with the otherwise perfect elements around them.
Normally, really pretty and super clean shots don't do it for me for a horror genre. Typically as soon as I see a film with a bunch of daytime exterior shots, I am disappointed as it seems to scream low effort, lack of skill or both. That being said, Ralph has in most every shot overcome this curse by choosing locations and time of day that works to set a mood. Nothing worse than mid day sun to kill the mood of a horror film, for me it just doesn't work to set a tone. Here Ralph has shown that there are exceptions to this. His choice of shots (most of them at least) were not out of a lack of effort or experience, rather, he seemed to chose them to make the most of his subject, keeping her images very flattering (not that she isn't a natural beauty already). The use of a lot of "golden hour" shots was the only way to pull off these types of shots, and while I like the lounge chair visual, I would have preferred that these too be at a different time of day (an awesome sunset in high contrast silhouette would have been my choice for this one). I realize that this would have pushed the number of shooting days, but this is really one of the very few areas that could have been a bit better. Not an error by any stretch, just a choice that could have been better in my opinion.
As for the gore shots, they were good, but not great. I liked that they were quick, its better to give a glimpse and let the mind do the rest, particularly when not executed to perfection (which would have required an excellent effect make up person to pull off).
I don't want to approached this with a "Brandonesque" style of bulleted, one liners of each category, that just doesn't come across as anything other than a knee jerk proclamation, not enough substance nor value for me. My comment on the directing was that based upon the story it could be best described as a second unit feel, not direction in the classic sense. This is not a criticism, just an observation of what came across. I can't tell from this how good of director Ralph is (but I suspect a hell of a lot better than I am), there just wasn't much to direct.
The acting was acceptable except for the hooded killer. This didn't work for me, nothing was terrifying about this person. The scream were also a bit weak, a better performance here could have helped to make the event more terrifying. On the audio front, the score and sounds were expertly crafted into the story with one very minor exception. The places where the jet engine noise were added were panned hard right, I think this would have been better if they were fully filled across the audio landscape.
Story, what there was of it, wasn't bad. I am so happy that Ralph didn't resort to cliché techniques like a corny voice over or some other band aide solution. Rather, this is a visual story and a wonderful executed one at that.
I recall following Ralph's debate over which camera to purchase. His choice in shooting style and use of locations and minimalistic lighting proves that he choose very well indeed. I am a big fan of 2/3" high end SD cameras, they do so many things well, and for this type of film, anything less would have diminished the result.
So, in conclusion, this film shows a large improvement as a filmmaker in terms of telling a story. Congratulations!
conrad_johnson
Well-known member
This one was good for me.
The story was a bit lacking, but............How the hell did you get the lighing to look like that in the plane shots????? Please do tell. I strive for natural looking daylight and that is it my friend. holy sh!t!
The story was a bit lacking, but............How the hell did you get the lighing to look like that in the plane shots????? Please do tell. I strive for natural looking daylight and that is it my friend. holy sh!t!
mameragex
Well-known member
:beer:I like this one a lot. I actually watched it twice just to make sure I hadn't missed anything. Cool camera work, pretty actress, LOVE the plane work. I liked the fact that It had a creative twist with the scenes that seemed like pleasant thoughts fading. Cool:thumbup::thumbup:
Brandon Rice
Distributed Producer
khmuse said:
Thanks a LOT! You don't think my comments are made without a LOT of watching and thought! I guess this shows me why you didn't bother to reply to my review of your film. Well, thanks for explaining how I have knee-jerk reaction reviews...
BTW: I don't...
Now back to Runway, which btw, is a GREAT film
Matt Sconce
Veteran
Hmmm....I thought the shots were beautiful the locations great but I needed a story. I tried to find one, but have not been able to. I am guessing it is that there are two futures she could have been in but because of the attack and death she is not in either one (The Beach, and the Plane) That is what I have come up with. This is a great display of Cinematography though. Congrats!
TheatreGuy
Veteran
Hey Rezfactor, I have now seen your film three times. I am trying to make something of what I've seen.
First of all, the cinematography is just flat-out incredible. You know how to use a camera!!! The framing of your shots are spotless. The lighting is error-free. You know how to make a picture!!! It is as beautiful as your subject matter.
And I watched that steadicam shot over and over... HOW DID YOU DO THAT???? There is no jog, bump, jerk, jitter, nothing!
The establishing shots at the airport were amazing. I love your choices. I know that sounds simple, but I just loved the subjects you picked out to shoot.
I like the music. Reminds me of Peter Gabriel's Passion, which I love.
The only thing that bothered me, (and yes, it is a biggie!), the lack of story. THe first time I saw your film, I was speechless. The second time of watching Runway, I tried to take in an abstract sense to the film. It still didn't work for me. I've now seen the film several times and I am having a tough time with the "storyline." (I know the reasons for this having shared many posts with you in the past.)
I don't know if you considered developing the stalker guy anymore. To me, he comes out of nowhere. Now, don't get me wrong... I know that life is like that. One day your here and the next day your not. No story, no establishing "shots."
But in story-telling, I feel you need to establish some things. If this was a story of how the young lady coped with her life after a stabbing, then I could see the stalker being underdeveloped and not established.
But in this story, the stalker seems to be a principle role. I would think that this film could have benefitted from a few opening shots of this guy watching her, stalking her. Even if you shot him by himself and left him mysterious.
I know that I am describing a cliche. But I think that a strong cliche is better than a weak story. And please, forgive me... I don't want to call your story weak. Maybe it is there and I am just too much of a fan of modern, stereotypical storylines.
I try not to be.
Rezfactor, I hope that you do another film festival and I hope that you feel confident enough to contact me for bouncing ideas.
I love the way you handle a camera. I would love to see you better develop the story.
Thanks for the film! I love your work!
Ted
First of all, the cinematography is just flat-out incredible. You know how to use a camera!!! The framing of your shots are spotless. The lighting is error-free. You know how to make a picture!!! It is as beautiful as your subject matter.
And I watched that steadicam shot over and over... HOW DID YOU DO THAT???? There is no jog, bump, jerk, jitter, nothing!
The establishing shots at the airport were amazing. I love your choices. I know that sounds simple, but I just loved the subjects you picked out to shoot.
I like the music. Reminds me of Peter Gabriel's Passion, which I love.
The only thing that bothered me, (and yes, it is a biggie!), the lack of story. THe first time I saw your film, I was speechless. The second time of watching Runway, I tried to take in an abstract sense to the film. It still didn't work for me. I've now seen the film several times and I am having a tough time with the "storyline." (I know the reasons for this having shared many posts with you in the past.)
I don't know if you considered developing the stalker guy anymore. To me, he comes out of nowhere. Now, don't get me wrong... I know that life is like that. One day your here and the next day your not. No story, no establishing "shots."
But in story-telling, I feel you need to establish some things. If this was a story of how the young lady coped with her life after a stabbing, then I could see the stalker being underdeveloped and not established.
But in this story, the stalker seems to be a principle role. I would think that this film could have benefitted from a few opening shots of this guy watching her, stalking her. Even if you shot him by himself and left him mysterious.
I know that I am describing a cliche. But I think that a strong cliche is better than a weak story. And please, forgive me... I don't want to call your story weak. Maybe it is there and I am just too much of a fan of modern, stereotypical storylines.
I try not to be.
Rezfactor, I hope that you do another film festival and I hope that you feel confident enough to contact me for bouncing ideas.
I love the way you handle a camera. I would love to see you better develop the story.
Thanks for the film! I love your work!
Ted
khmuse
Tech Guru
Brandon Rice said:Thanks a LOT! You don't think my comments are made without a LOT of watching and thought! I guess this shows me why you didn't bother to reply to my review of your film. Well, thanks for explaining how I have knee-jerk reaction reviews...
BTW: I don't...
Now back to Runway, which btw, is a GREAT film
Hey Brandon don't take my label as a criticism of your effort; rather as a criticism of your approach. You have made a gallant effort to write something about nearly every film (and you do seem to be prolific in that regard) but I would have much preferred a more specific response to specifics that are applicable to each film, rather than a generic approach of commenting on each and every film in the same manner (or style as I have inferred). For me statements of what was liked (or disliked) without specifics points have much less value. My apologies for the "...knee jerk" comment, it was likely over stated and under valued your effort.
Consider if you write that you didn't like something, say in one of your categories, ie acting. Without a supporting specific reference, the value of your comment is we now know your opinion, but can't take much from it that could fall into the category of "constructive criticism" rather its just opinion.
Further, my comment wasn't an attack, rather an explanation as to why I was commenting on specifics aspects of RUNWAY rather than a pre determined format of commenting on each aspect of each film in a very similar manner (what I have coined "Brandonesque"). You have strong opinions, and that is great, but I would suggest dropping the "formula" approach as the purpose of this effort is feedback, specifically feedback that can have value to the filmmaker.
Hope that this clears things up for you and that there isn't any hard feelings over my comment.
As for RUNWAY, I fully agree, this is as you have stated a " ...GREAT film" and I hope that my comments on it clearly convey that opinion.
Ralph Oshiro
Veteran
RUNWAY
First of all, thank you all for your insightful reviews.
• msconce said, ". . . I needed a story. I tried to find one, but have not been able to." If the story was unclear, then clearly, I failed as a storyteller. Me and my co-writer discussed how to solve this problem, and have developed additional ideas that I think would address the story problem.
• A co-worker commented that, "the killer [or killing] wasn't credible or threatening enough." This has bothered me ever since I finished the final edit. I have since thought of a better way to shoot this sequence that introduces the killer in a more clever fashion.
• khmuse stated, "My comment on the directing was that based upon the story it could be best described as a second unit feel, not direction in the classic sense." I agree. I couldn't quite put my finger on it until you pointed it out. Often, my stuff looks like a "camera guy" putting together pretty shots, instead of a "filmmaker" making an interesting short. This is a continuing challange.
• khmuse also pointed out, "The places where the jet engine noise were added were panned hard right, I think this would have been better if they were fully filled across the audio landscape." Yup. This is a big "Whoops!" Also, the "Nikon F4 motor drive" sound was a mono sample panned hard left, another mistake.
First of all, thank you all for your insightful reviews.
• msconce said, ". . . I needed a story. I tried to find one, but have not been able to." If the story was unclear, then clearly, I failed as a storyteller. Me and my co-writer discussed how to solve this problem, and have developed additional ideas that I think would address the story problem.
• A co-worker commented that, "the killer [or killing] wasn't credible or threatening enough." This has bothered me ever since I finished the final edit. I have since thought of a better way to shoot this sequence that introduces the killer in a more clever fashion.
• khmuse stated, "My comment on the directing was that based upon the story it could be best described as a second unit feel, not direction in the classic sense." I agree. I couldn't quite put my finger on it until you pointed it out. Often, my stuff looks like a "camera guy" putting together pretty shots, instead of a "filmmaker" making an interesting short. This is a continuing challange.
• khmuse also pointed out, "The places where the jet engine noise were added were panned hard right, I think this would have been better if they were fully filled across the audio landscape." Yup. This is a big "Whoops!" Also, the "Nikon F4 motor drive" sound was a mono sample panned hard left, another mistake.
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Ralph Oshiro
Veteran
Well, Brandon, thank you for the hugely positive review! I was at least expecting to see one major criticism in your "story" category, but I was glad to see that you "got it." I had planned to take some risks on this one, and I did. We later thought of a better edit, and a new final shot that would've better referenced all of the time elements, but my point was not to over-explain. Hitting high marks on your entire scorecard was a nice surprise--thank you!Brandon Rice said:
khmuse
Tech Guru
Rezfactor said:
All I can say is if you ever do fully develop your skills as a director and story teller, the filmmaking world had better watch out, you have the potential to be really REALLY good. I have little doubt that the world will see something special come from you. I myself have no idea what it will be, but I can't wait to see it!
Rezfactor said:
No, this is a really small "Whoops" at the most, hardly worth mentioning and it really didn't hurt the film at all.
Brandon Rice
Distributed Producer
Rezfactor said:
you deserved it... I think if you grab the viewer off the bat, and they're into it, the story works... this isn't a movie where you can jump in 2 minutes in and get it... but you grabbed me and I loved it... too bad the film isn't in competition.
Ralph Oshiro
Veteran
By the way . . .
There's a "bookend" shot that provides a nice symmetry to the opening shot--it's at the VERY end of the type-over-black credits, following the copyright notice. I was wondering how many of you caught it?
There's a "bookend" shot that provides a nice symmetry to the opening shot--it's at the VERY end of the type-over-black credits, following the copyright notice. I was wondering how many of you caught it?
Brandon Rice
Distributed Producer
I saw it... the sunset and her going into the ocean, right? Beautiful shot!
Hey Rez.
I had to review this one
First impression - Love it. First impressions were almost a Donnie Darko-type feel to the flick. I am a huge fan of metaphor and allegory when done right, and I think you accomplished this admirably. Strictly speaking, I think you are skirting the traditional definition of horror with this short, but as a proponent of stretching the conventions of the genre, I'm right there with ya'. Not to denigrate others work here, but far too few pushed any boundaries besides reiterating modern day tropes.
Second impression - I felt that in a way you were trying to amp up the horror element in the flick, which seemed at cross purposes to the thriller/drama aspect or nature of it. Specifically, when the attacher attacked, it felt somewhat incongrous to the greater themes involved. And the traditional "Psycho" type attack didn't seem as innovative as the rest of the flick. Also, I noticed you kept the same kind of music throughout the attack. Watching it, I felt that complete naturalistic sounds (breathing etc...) or a similar concordant msic, with different emphasis to isolate this event, may have been more effective.
The jogging footage, while smooth and directed well, seemed a little unnaturalistic (from the girls jogging). She seemed to be lifting up her knees to slow her pace (I assume so you could keep up with her). Perhaps, it would have made more sense to let her jog at a normal speed, and then track with her as she passes, and let her jog down the path into a E/LS. It was only a minor thing I noticed, and it may be because I am a filmmaker that I did notice it. In no way does it detract from the flick, though.
The way you edited this footage was very effective. I am a fan of non-linear editing, when it services the story and doesn't substitute for the story, and you were clearly the former. The jumping in time and metaphor built to a very successfull climax and I have to tell you, I felt a wee bit of melancholy at the end of the short. Somehow, I cared about the character in your short, or at least moreso than many other films I've viewed. And the score was a standout amongst ALL of the fest entries. Your score had to carry so much of the intent of the visual images (since they were open to interpretation at least until near the end). I was a little worried when you didn't reply to my question about your score in the thread - I thought you were probably frustrated with it - but you pulled a rabbit out of the hat for your short, IMHO.
Standout shots - by far, the plane flying overhead while she lays sun tanning. Besides being completely appropriate for your story visually, I had to smile at your ingenuity to steal a shot at the exact spot that you could get that plane and her together (at the right angle/fov). Also, the lighting in the plane was as good as I've seen, even in the theater. Pullling off that naturalism, while still being dramatic is a feat unto itself. Clearly, the DSR (and you) can pull of some clean images.
Possible changes - these are only things that occured to me Rez. You can toss 'em if you want, but I just thought I'd think out loud here. I think tying in the airport (metaphor) earlier would act as a nice book end to the film. Even a quick shot of the lights of the airport, for example, or the same landing lights that you had in the end of the short. As mentioned before, a subtle change in effects/music for the attack, and perhaps a less traditional attack could be reshot ? Another thought that popped into my mind is if you had one or more characters during her ordinary life, maybe a passing jogger etc... show up on the plane as a passenger. The metaphorical nature should be hinted at a wee bit more, IMO, but since this was a six minute cut, I can see where you were coming from. Personally, I could see with some further development, and a few more scenes, this being accepted in some decent fests. There are only a handful of films i can say that about and yours is one of them.
Third impression- overall I saw some real development for you as a filmmaker. I can understand your trepidation at just being a "pretty" shooter, but that's going to be a complaint of those that don't dig the style as much as Wong kar Wai has faced those same comments. Believe me, there are plenty of shpooters out there that do very pretty and technically great stuff, that I couldn't give two stuffs about. I have a fine affinity for subtext and visual poetry, beyond the whiz bang factor, and you my friend have a filmmakers voice. Yes, it needs to be developed, and often you put yourself in a time rush, when you may be a director who needs to explore themes and story in a more exended (a la European) way - but , IMHO, there is a voice there and more than a DP/shooters. Call it a hunch...
In conclusion, the short was effective, held my interest, and there were some real moments of reflection for the viewer to ponder/enjoy. There was some small aspects that stopped it from being all that it could be cohesively. Even though the short skimmed the margins of the defintion of horror(IMHO), in totality it was a tangible step forward for you REZ. And it's one step, I'm glad you've taken...:beer:
BTW, you should get that little filly (actress) into your next pic. I'd like to see a longer collaboration between you two. Maybe she can move closer ? (Sorry if this review is a little ramblin'... )
Thanks for making this REZ. :beer:
I had to review this one
First impression - Love it. First impressions were almost a Donnie Darko-type feel to the flick. I am a huge fan of metaphor and allegory when done right, and I think you accomplished this admirably. Strictly speaking, I think you are skirting the traditional definition of horror with this short, but as a proponent of stretching the conventions of the genre, I'm right there with ya'. Not to denigrate others work here, but far too few pushed any boundaries besides reiterating modern day tropes.
Second impression - I felt that in a way you were trying to amp up the horror element in the flick, which seemed at cross purposes to the thriller/drama aspect or nature of it. Specifically, when the attacher attacked, it felt somewhat incongrous to the greater themes involved. And the traditional "Psycho" type attack didn't seem as innovative as the rest of the flick. Also, I noticed you kept the same kind of music throughout the attack. Watching it, I felt that complete naturalistic sounds (breathing etc...) or a similar concordant msic, with different emphasis to isolate this event, may have been more effective.
The jogging footage, while smooth and directed well, seemed a little unnaturalistic (from the girls jogging). She seemed to be lifting up her knees to slow her pace (I assume so you could keep up with her). Perhaps, it would have made more sense to let her jog at a normal speed, and then track with her as she passes, and let her jog down the path into a E/LS. It was only a minor thing I noticed, and it may be because I am a filmmaker that I did notice it. In no way does it detract from the flick, though.
The way you edited this footage was very effective. I am a fan of non-linear editing, when it services the story and doesn't substitute for the story, and you were clearly the former. The jumping in time and metaphor built to a very successfull climax and I have to tell you, I felt a wee bit of melancholy at the end of the short. Somehow, I cared about the character in your short, or at least moreso than many other films I've viewed. And the score was a standout amongst ALL of the fest entries. Your score had to carry so much of the intent of the visual images (since they were open to interpretation at least until near the end). I was a little worried when you didn't reply to my question about your score in the thread - I thought you were probably frustrated with it - but you pulled a rabbit out of the hat for your short, IMHO.
Standout shots - by far, the plane flying overhead while she lays sun tanning. Besides being completely appropriate for your story visually, I had to smile at your ingenuity to steal a shot at the exact spot that you could get that plane and her together (at the right angle/fov). Also, the lighting in the plane was as good as I've seen, even in the theater. Pullling off that naturalism, while still being dramatic is a feat unto itself. Clearly, the DSR (and you) can pull of some clean images.
Possible changes - these are only things that occured to me Rez. You can toss 'em if you want, but I just thought I'd think out loud here. I think tying in the airport (metaphor) earlier would act as a nice book end to the film. Even a quick shot of the lights of the airport, for example, or the same landing lights that you had in the end of the short. As mentioned before, a subtle change in effects/music for the attack, and perhaps a less traditional attack could be reshot ? Another thought that popped into my mind is if you had one or more characters during her ordinary life, maybe a passing jogger etc... show up on the plane as a passenger. The metaphorical nature should be hinted at a wee bit more, IMO, but since this was a six minute cut, I can see where you were coming from. Personally, I could see with some further development, and a few more scenes, this being accepted in some decent fests. There are only a handful of films i can say that about and yours is one of them.
Third impression- overall I saw some real development for you as a filmmaker. I can understand your trepidation at just being a "pretty" shooter, but that's going to be a complaint of those that don't dig the style as much as Wong kar Wai has faced those same comments. Believe me, there are plenty of shpooters out there that do very pretty and technically great stuff, that I couldn't give two stuffs about. I have a fine affinity for subtext and visual poetry, beyond the whiz bang factor, and you my friend have a filmmakers voice. Yes, it needs to be developed, and often you put yourself in a time rush, when you may be a director who needs to explore themes and story in a more exended (a la European) way - but , IMHO, there is a voice there and more than a DP/shooters. Call it a hunch...
In conclusion, the short was effective, held my interest, and there were some real moments of reflection for the viewer to ponder/enjoy. There was some small aspects that stopped it from being all that it could be cohesively. Even though the short skimmed the margins of the defintion of horror(IMHO), in totality it was a tangible step forward for you REZ. And it's one step, I'm glad you've taken...:beer:
BTW, you should get that little filly (actress) into your next pic. I'd like to see a longer collaboration between you two. Maybe she can move closer ? (Sorry if this review is a little ramblin'... )
Thanks for making this REZ. :beer:
Ralph Oshiro
Veteran
D&G:
WOW! I really appreciate your thoughtful comments D&G! You knew EVERYTHING! YES, I was too out of shape to keep up with her jogging--I kept telling her, "run slower, SLOWER, SLOWER!!!" Also, you have excellent insights into how I can improve the short! If I can manage one more day of additional shooting, I think I can address most of the issues that I (and others) have with the film. I think your idea of tying in an airport element with the jogging early on is perfect, and I know a perfect place to shoot just that. Thank you so much for the time and thought you invested to make these detailed comments on my behalf--it's very, very much appreciated!
Oh yeah, also, as you said, I always seem to be trying to "jam" the contest-defined genre into my submission. As I said, you made some very insightful comments! Hopefully, I'll maintain some incentive to "fix" the film, and then I will more willingly look forward to submitting it elsewhere. It's a difficult decision for me to go back and do the extra shooting and "fix" the film, or to just chalk it up to experience, and move on to a new project. But I think you're right. I would be much more satisfied with the short if I do go back and re-shoot a couple things. Thanks again for both your high praise, and your spot-on critique!
WOW! I really appreciate your thoughtful comments D&G! You knew EVERYTHING! YES, I was too out of shape to keep up with her jogging--I kept telling her, "run slower, SLOWER, SLOWER!!!" Also, you have excellent insights into how I can improve the short! If I can manage one more day of additional shooting, I think I can address most of the issues that I (and others) have with the film. I think your idea of tying in an airport element with the jogging early on is perfect, and I know a perfect place to shoot just that. Thank you so much for the time and thought you invested to make these detailed comments on my behalf--it's very, very much appreciated!
Oh yeah, also, as you said, I always seem to be trying to "jam" the contest-defined genre into my submission. As I said, you made some very insightful comments! Hopefully, I'll maintain some incentive to "fix" the film, and then I will more willingly look forward to submitting it elsewhere. It's a difficult decision for me to go back and do the extra shooting and "fix" the film, or to just chalk it up to experience, and move on to a new project. But I think you're right. I would be much more satisfied with the short if I do go back and re-shoot a couple things. Thanks again for both your high praise, and your spot-on critique!
Review | POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT! I watch the movies first time around strictly for enjoyment, second and third for review.
Hey Rez. Got a chance to check out your short. I have to say that I'm going to have trouble reviewing this one, simply because of the disjointed story.
Script - I wathced three times. And I kept wondering when I would see what I was missing but apparently I didn't catch it. I still dunno what's going on. I have to say that something about it feels really Donnie Darko, but in a way that I can't seem to put together. Was this one on a skeletal structure and not necessarily written? Or do you have a full blown script? I might just be really stuipd, honestly. I just can't seem to put together what's going on. You get a plane explosion and a fatal stab wound. Are you saying that no matter what she does she's destined to die on the same day? Sorry, again I might just be flat-out retarded.
Direction - I believe I caught a short from you before in Sci-Fest and I never reviewed. I'm reviewing now and I can say that visually, this is your better. I noticed staples to your name/creation: a lot of tense zooms on vehicles and the like. I also liked the first jogging shot, the creep from behind the trees. Your framing is really great throughout. The frame up of her legs as she removes her tights is great, and so is the coverage on the interior of the plane scenes. The weight as the plane began to rumble was nice. Shaking cam and all.
Acting - She played complacent all the way through. Kinda just hung out and did her thing. What I didn't like, and this was on the first go around, was the really weird jogging she was doing. It's like she was prancing and not working out. It could've been because of production limitations, it just didn't sit right with me. The scuffle scene with the knife I wasn't feeling. It felt really odd, but I can't exactly say why. Which sucks. Not too much else to go on for acting. I do have a question: why'd she have a ponytail going on in the shower and still wet her hair? You had a nice sized cast of extras as well. Cool mang.
Cine/Lighting - Great lighting throughout. The interior of the plane looked nice. Dunno how you managed that, but it was cool. I also like all of the exterior shots. The first jogging scene starts off really soft and blurry, almost dream-like but it wasn't at all bad. Nice locations. Dunno how you scored an airplane if you did, but it was great.
Editing - Clean cut. The parts where you went through showing the bomb squad stood out as really clean, well timed. The only thing I thought strange was the opening. She seems to be walking toward the camera way too long and gets to that point where you're like "She's going to walk into the camera", and it became odd for me. Otherwise, clean. I like the runway ending footage.
Sound - Well schemed. Foreboding score was clean. I have one issue with a certain part: when the bomb explodes it sounds like an explosion, and then I realize the sound in the background is rain. I don't see any rain afterward. I have on headphones so it really stood out to me as odd. You probably had a reason that I'm too stupid to realize, but it was kind of odd. The explosion itself was weighty, though.
Special Effects/Art Direction/Wardrobe - Blood looked like blood to me. I think the stab scenes were a bit on the weak side. I could honestly tell she wasn't being stabbed and that kinda pulls me out of the visual, even if I dunno WHAT the heck she's being stabbed for or what it has to do with the airplane footage. Blood in the tub was thick, looked like blood and didn't turn into a watery-red. Nice.
Scariest Moments - The bomb exploding of course. I don't like planes in the first place, and bombs exploding on one is pretty scary in it's own right.
Overall consensus -If I have to go back for a fourth watch, I will. I just dunno what the story was about. Visually great, though. I could watch it regardless and learn/steal some stuff from you. Sorry that I don't get it. I haven't read your thread yet but I'll go back to see if I can find out what's going on. Thanks for exhibiting dude.
Hey Rez. Got a chance to check out your short. I have to say that I'm going to have trouble reviewing this one, simply because of the disjointed story.
Script - I wathced three times. And I kept wondering when I would see what I was missing but apparently I didn't catch it. I still dunno what's going on. I have to say that something about it feels really Donnie Darko, but in a way that I can't seem to put together. Was this one on a skeletal structure and not necessarily written? Or do you have a full blown script? I might just be really stuipd, honestly. I just can't seem to put together what's going on. You get a plane explosion and a fatal stab wound. Are you saying that no matter what she does she's destined to die on the same day? Sorry, again I might just be flat-out retarded.
Direction - I believe I caught a short from you before in Sci-Fest and I never reviewed. I'm reviewing now and I can say that visually, this is your better. I noticed staples to your name/creation: a lot of tense zooms on vehicles and the like. I also liked the first jogging shot, the creep from behind the trees. Your framing is really great throughout. The frame up of her legs as she removes her tights is great, and so is the coverage on the interior of the plane scenes. The weight as the plane began to rumble was nice. Shaking cam and all.
Acting - She played complacent all the way through. Kinda just hung out and did her thing. What I didn't like, and this was on the first go around, was the really weird jogging she was doing. It's like she was prancing and not working out. It could've been because of production limitations, it just didn't sit right with me. The scuffle scene with the knife I wasn't feeling. It felt really odd, but I can't exactly say why. Which sucks. Not too much else to go on for acting. I do have a question: why'd she have a ponytail going on in the shower and still wet her hair? You had a nice sized cast of extras as well. Cool mang.
Cine/Lighting - Great lighting throughout. The interior of the plane looked nice. Dunno how you managed that, but it was cool. I also like all of the exterior shots. The first jogging scene starts off really soft and blurry, almost dream-like but it wasn't at all bad. Nice locations. Dunno how you scored an airplane if you did, but it was great.
Editing - Clean cut. The parts where you went through showing the bomb squad stood out as really clean, well timed. The only thing I thought strange was the opening. She seems to be walking toward the camera way too long and gets to that point where you're like "She's going to walk into the camera", and it became odd for me. Otherwise, clean. I like the runway ending footage.
Sound - Well schemed. Foreboding score was clean. I have one issue with a certain part: when the bomb explodes it sounds like an explosion, and then I realize the sound in the background is rain. I don't see any rain afterward. I have on headphones so it really stood out to me as odd. You probably had a reason that I'm too stupid to realize, but it was kind of odd. The explosion itself was weighty, though.
Special Effects/Art Direction/Wardrobe - Blood looked like blood to me. I think the stab scenes were a bit on the weak side. I could honestly tell she wasn't being stabbed and that kinda pulls me out of the visual, even if I dunno WHAT the heck she's being stabbed for or what it has to do with the airplane footage. Blood in the tub was thick, looked like blood and didn't turn into a watery-red. Nice.
Scariest Moments - The bomb exploding of course. I don't like planes in the first place, and bombs exploding on one is pretty scary in it's own right.
Overall consensus -If I have to go back for a fourth watch, I will. I just dunno what the story was about. Visually great, though. I could watch it regardless and learn/steal some stuff from you. Sorry that I don't get it. I haven't read your thread yet but I'll go back to see if I can find out what's going on. Thanks for exhibiting dude.
Rezfactor said:
:beer: (no prob.)
Like I said, even with just a few minor tweaks you have a really good short. If you want to put in a day or two of reshoots, it could be really great. I guess it will depend on your goals (festivals ), scheduling, cast & crew, budget etc... Either way, it was a pleasure to see the short, and your directorial voice coming out more (story-wise).
Look forward to seeing more from ya' REZ. :beer:
Ralph.
Looks awesome man (of course).
Loved not only the framing and lighting or use of light but also the camera movement - very very slick.
Before I ask some questions about story and its place in your process, let me first make sure its understood that this just looks fantastic, really pro, and lots of great nuances in the shots. I can't say enough about that. Lots of evocative moments leap off the screen.
Now on to story.
Its interesting to see people evolve and grow over these fests. I feel like you started awesome and have remained awesome in the camera dept. But I feel like you are treading water or even taking some steps back in terms of story, or at least have not hit story as strongly as you did this time last year in Zombie fest. I thought the story in Infection was thought out well and perfect for the time, and had a nice button.
You seem to love certain elements of filmmaking, you seem put on the earth to frame, light and move the camera and you seem less interested in other areas of filmmaking. I'm wondering if you feel that the way you are working is evolving project to project toward some process wich eventually yields a story driven film or whether you feel you are kind of moving in circles around this story issue.
I really enjoy looking at your films, and I'm personally interested in your career and what your goals are just knowing you here from DVXuser. I'm just curious what those goals might be. Are these films an excuse to use your own gear and dabble in story? Or do you have dreams of hitting the festival circuit with your films? If its the former then I cool, you are turning out stuff that looks amazing and your films are better than most. If its the latter then I'm wondering why not ...
Jack
Looks awesome man (of course).
Loved not only the framing and lighting or use of light but also the camera movement - very very slick.
Before I ask some questions about story and its place in your process, let me first make sure its understood that this just looks fantastic, really pro, and lots of great nuances in the shots. I can't say enough about that. Lots of evocative moments leap off the screen.
Now on to story.
Its interesting to see people evolve and grow over these fests. I feel like you started awesome and have remained awesome in the camera dept. But I feel like you are treading water or even taking some steps back in terms of story, or at least have not hit story as strongly as you did this time last year in Zombie fest. I thought the story in Infection was thought out well and perfect for the time, and had a nice button.
You seem to love certain elements of filmmaking, you seem put on the earth to frame, light and move the camera and you seem less interested in other areas of filmmaking. I'm wondering if you feel that the way you are working is evolving project to project toward some process wich eventually yields a story driven film or whether you feel you are kind of moving in circles around this story issue.
I really enjoy looking at your films, and I'm personally interested in your career and what your goals are just knowing you here from DVXuser. I'm just curious what those goals might be. Are these films an excuse to use your own gear and dabble in story? Or do you have dreams of hitting the festival circuit with your films? If its the former then I cool, you are turning out stuff that looks amazing and your films are better than most. If its the latter then I'm wondering why not ...
- screw story all together and just make amazing montage videos.
- really commit to making story the center of your process (while it seems there is little room for improvement your already amazing shooting, your lens craft would get even better in service of a taught story - or it would have even more impact)
- hook up with some writer / director and you be the co-producer / shooter. Not saying just shoot some guy or gals movie for free, but why not hook up with someone that lives and breathes story and concept the way you live and breathe light and shooting?
Jack