"Once A Hero" - Envision / 235 Studios

There was a lot to like about this film. Like most of the films, the soundtrack was excellent. I think you have a gift for working with actors, which is probably the most important job a director has to do in the first place. Performances were quite believable, and that's a big deal, especially for sci-fi where there's such a leap of faith to accept the story.
I found the plot very difficult to follow. I think as a rule of thumb, if you need a page of backstory to get your point across, you should be telling a simpler story. Next time around I'd do some extra sanity-checking of your script with people who don't know it (or you) that well.
The cinematography was tasteful and restrained, but I'd look for a more compelling location next time. Setting a film in an apartment is a good choice *practically*, but since you have total control over the location, I'm expecting top-notch framing and set dressing with every shot. The framing of the coat sequence was particularly obtuse, as we didn't get a good look at the object she was examining.
Great film, and see you next fest.
 
Thanks, Penfever, but as I've said before it's not the script ... it was the editing unfortunately that makes this harder to follow, trying to cram a 23 minute film into 6 minutes.

Not that it matters now, but I'm going to put together the cut of what I SHOULD have entered into the fest (hind sight's 20/20), and post it up here in the next several days. I think people will find it a lot more satisfying, and it's still quite self contained.

Thanks again for the feedback.
 
SPARROW website now available!

SPARROW website now available!

www.eefilm.com/sparrow

Now that the festival judging has closed, we've taken the password protect off the website ... you can now view additional BTS pics from scenes not included in the DVXuser cut, as well as backstory, cast/crew photos & more.

A DVD with the full 23 minute cut, and TONS of Behind The Scenes (yes, it also includes my "Norm's Famous Ribs" ala Robert Rodriquez Cooking School 101 style) will be available for purchase in about a month. DVD's will be fully retail packaged in an Amaray case, complete with poly overwrap, like you just purchased it right off the shelf. :)

Please note that the DVXuser cut is not the best representation of the film for story. I will post the cut I SHOULD have put up within a few days, after we've gotten back the completed & permanent VFX by our very own Steve_Arm out of Athens, Greece (I've seen the work in progress, and it's extremely nice!).
 
I really like the cinematography but didn't like some of the effects. I kind of get the main idea but don't understand the whole thing yet(the whole insect thing). Looking forward for more.

g.
 
Full 6.5 minute scene loading up now

Full 6.5 minute scene loading up now

Okay, I've deleted the DVXuser 6 minute cut, and have temporarily placed up the full scene that SHOULD have been worked into the 6 minute submission instead ... I think it would have worked a lot better. Hind sight's 20/20, right?

This is still only less than 1/3 of the entire film, but a good scene that still has a beginning, middle & end.

Final VFX and audio sweetening still in the works. Final BTS material being shot this weekend (Rib recipe/cooking school being shot on Friday), and the DVD is expected to be ready by mid July.

Anyone who wants to see the 6.5 minute cut from the film, just right click on the poster at the front of this thread (still being uploaded with 12+ minutes to go - 45MB total).
 
Awesome... it's a MUCH better way to tell the story Norm... I think it kind of moves slow for me... and it does feel like a small portion of a larger story, but it works better than the other cut... can't wait to see the full version!
 
Envision,

I just viewed some of your six min sample of THE SPARROW.

Very nice visuals/ acting/ direction. Although I noticed the 180 rule broke many times.

What gives?

EJ
 
I don't follow you, EJ ... want to give some examples? Ryan's a STICKLER on the 180 rule, so I'd be hard pressed to see him breaking it (he was the DP), not to mention when I watch it, for each shot it appears to be in place to me.

Again, some specific examples/time codes would be great, thanks.

Glad you liked what you saw though. On the website we have Trailer A up & running & Trailer B should be up in the next day or so. Also have some fun wallpapers up as well, and hope to have the completed DVD available within the next two weeks.
 
Oh, thanks for the time codes, EJ! In looking at those, I'm guessing you're thinking the 180 should be with the front of the house or the door? So if we go past the door we're crossing the line?

The 180 rule, from the way I understand it is that you can start your camera anywhere in the scene, which establishes one POV. From there, draw a straight line out of the lens ... as if you're shooting a bullet & you follow the trajectory. Then, you can place your camera/POV anywhere within that scene, as long as the camera doesn't cross BEYOND that trajectory, facing from the opposite direction.

So using the above definition, since we start out looking JUST over her left shoulder, we have clear until POV from just behind HIS left shoulder to still be within the 180 ... if we had crossed over to where we were looking from over his RIGHT shoulder, then we would have crossed it.

BTW, we've got two pretty cool shots of Sparrow in the rain in the alley ... the one at the front of this thread, where she's walking towards us, and another where she's rising from the ground (now located on www.myspace.com/normsanders), which used to be in this thread ... which were you referring to? Glad you loved it, either way!
 
First off, I'm glad that you liked the look, acting, and the teaser. The full cut is coming along nicely. I know I'm excited to see it come together. (As is Norm)


On to your 180 question-

EJ Pennypacker said:
05:16 - 180 issue here
Click to expand...

The line of action in this scene goes straight through the actors, and from Sparrows view we are right on the line of action. From Meltdowns view we are about 110 degrees into the line of action on the right side. I guess technically you could say that the line was crossed by a couple of inches, as the actors shift weight, moving their placement between shots.

EJ Pennypacker said:
05:20 - 180 line crossed no?
Click to expand...

I do not see how this could be crossing the line, as it is a CU of Meltdown, with him in center frame. Again, if anything it would be directly on the line of action.

EJ Pennypacker said:
05:26 - 180 again
Click to expand...

I'm not seeing this one- it is a CU of Sparrow.

The 180 rule is ment to keep actors on the same side of the screen to provide continuity when viewing. In that sequence, sparrow appears on the left side of the screen, while meltdown appears on the right. The only times this does not occur is in the wide shots when we are on the line of action and they are in the center of the screen. (And in some CU's)

Hope that helps. :)
 
Envision,

Yeah, the pic that's used at the beginning of this thread is the sweet one!

My point is that we cut from over Sparrows left shoulder to establish the scene, then when we cut back to the CU of her face, it's from the Meltdowns left shoulder, when it should be his right shoulder no? To me, it just throws the scene off with all the various angles in which it cuts.

Just my two cents. Like I said, very nice work. Very pro looking. Looking forward to seeing more. :)

EJ
 
EJ Pennypacker said:
My point is that we cut from over Sparrows left shoulder to establish the scene, then when we cut back to the CU of her face, it's from the Meltdowns left shoulder, when it should be his right shoulder no?
Click to expand...

I can see your point. I guess that I would then have to say, that it is not the following shots that are off, but rather the begining shot- as the following shots are more consistent.

EJ Pennypacker said:
To me, it just throws the scene off with all the various angles in which it cuts.
Click to expand...

If it throws you off, than there is not much I can say bout that- since that is how you precieve it- I can't argue that point. But what I can say, is that I do not find it disrtacting, nor disorentating. I have watched many movies in which the 180 was radically crossed, and I was still able to follow the action. Anyway, I'm glad that overall you liked it. Thanks for your thoughts, and criticism- I appreciate being kept on my toes!
 
Sorry if it's been asked before. But was that a rain machine used for the opening shot of SPARROW? Or natural rainy night?

EJ
 
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