Imprint
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Norm Sanders
Script Wrangler
I'll have to watch it again with that question in mind to make a better judgement ... but I WILL say that your production quality & filmmaking abilities (as shown in IMPRINT) tells that you SHOULD be making a feature ... whether it's IMPRINT or something else altogether.
I'll get a review up later ... still trying to get through the last of the films.
I'll get a review up later ... still trying to get through the last of the films.
dougspice
Veteran
I'd agree with that. I think the story here was very well framed and presented, and you'd risk losing that in expanding the feature. However, if you set the virus/treatment as the world background, and then opened the feature with a teaser similar to these 6 minutes, I think you might really be on to something.
Well done, man! One of the best.
Well done, man! One of the best.
Herman Witkam
Well-known member
Very impressive storytelling & cinematography! One of my favs :beer:
I really liked the look of your film, a lot of them this fest. The dolly shot of them in the garage with the gun pointing was amazing. the burning of the photo as well. Great stuff in the Hallway, very filmic.
I"ll be honest, I am not a fan of prolonged V.O. This is a complicated story to be told in 6 minutes so I can understand its need here.
If you do decide to make it into a feature, I would want two questions answered immediately as an audience member. If this is a flu or something that has broken out, would people gather in a restaurant? Also, I would want the conflict of conscience explained further. Clearly he has killed many times before, I wanted to understand why this time was different?
The acting was an A+ , I thought even the V.O. had nice subtlety. Very good film as a whole.
I"ll be honest, I am not a fan of prolonged V.O. This is a complicated story to be told in 6 minutes so I can understand its need here.
If you do decide to make it into a feature, I would want two questions answered immediately as an audience member. If this is a flu or something that has broken out, would people gather in a restaurant? Also, I would want the conflict of conscience explained further. Clearly he has killed many times before, I wanted to understand why this time was different?
The acting was an A+ , I thought even the V.O. had nice subtlety. Very good film as a whole.
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Darkline
Veteran
Another one in my top 3 here. (havent seen them all)
What I liked is that this was the only short film I have seen so far that has gone for some emotional impact/refection and succeeded. But also told within an interesting spy premise.
This had one of the the best combinations of style and story. Some had fantastic style but didnt pull the story off; others had a good story but perhaps were lacking in procudtion. This is one of the few that all round 'worked'.
I liked the actor a lot too, he gave the role the right amount of sublety.
Overall I have nothing really negative to say - there were maybe one or two shots that stood out as being less than stellar (picking up the needle was one), but im getting highly critical here because there's not much to pick at.
really good work, and I hope you enter the next fest
What I liked is that this was the only short film I have seen so far that has gone for some emotional impact/refection and succeeded. But also told within an interesting spy premise.
This had one of the the best combinations of style and story. Some had fantastic style but didnt pull the story off; others had a good story but perhaps were lacking in procudtion. This is one of the few that all round 'worked'.
I liked the actor a lot too, he gave the role the right amount of sublety.
Overall I have nothing really negative to say - there were maybe one or two shots that stood out as being less than stellar (picking up the needle was one), but im getting highly critical here because there's not much to pick at.
really good work, and I hope you enter the next fest
This one got my vote for best SpyFest short. Although a couple of others exhibited a comparable level of technical merit, none told a story as well as your's did.
I would absolutely expand this into a longer form project, though I think you might consider that episodic TV could be another place for it. Within each episode, you have the potential to reveal a little more about this world he lives in - are the rest of the affected population quarantined or dead?
Who put this virus out there - maybe the same people who have hired him to kill his marks? Why? Perhaps he is working for an insurgency - people who have figured out that a world government launched the virus in a campaign to change the world order. Or is he killing the very people who lead this resistance?
I think you've probably explored concepts like this, but think about how you could introduce new characters each week - and how his contacts would act as recurring ones. Perhaps he crosses the line when he spares this girl - opening his eyes to a small part of the bigger picture. Whatever is between them, she'll eventually have someone else after her. It would be a race against his own mortality and the threat of their collaboration being discovered.
It could be really interesting to see this develop over two seasons.
With a small feature, you have the same ability to expand the concept and a much higher likelihood of getting it made. Still, I think TV would make an interesting future home for the base concept.
You can launch your own Lost franchise after the feature posts some good numbers!
e
I would absolutely expand this into a longer form project, though I think you might consider that episodic TV could be another place for it. Within each episode, you have the potential to reveal a little more about this world he lives in - are the rest of the affected population quarantined or dead?
Who put this virus out there - maybe the same people who have hired him to kill his marks? Why? Perhaps he is working for an insurgency - people who have figured out that a world government launched the virus in a campaign to change the world order. Or is he killing the very people who lead this resistance?
I think you've probably explored concepts like this, but think about how you could introduce new characters each week - and how his contacts would act as recurring ones. Perhaps he crosses the line when he spares this girl - opening his eyes to a small part of the bigger picture. Whatever is between them, she'll eventually have someone else after her. It would be a race against his own mortality and the threat of their collaboration being discovered.
It could be really interesting to see this develop over two seasons.
With a small feature, you have the same ability to expand the concept and a much higher likelihood of getting it made. Still, I think TV would make an interesting future home for the base concept.
You can launch your own Lost franchise after the feature posts some good numbers!
e
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This was a really solid short film. I'm not a huge fan of VO, but you used it in a very unobtrusive truthful way. The VO allowed us to get inside the characters head when usually it's used as a crutch to get across exposition.
And this was very well executed, my only technical complaint was that tracking shot in the diner. It cut off the actors heads. The confrontation with the girl in the parking lot was very well done.
I loved that your film built and raised the stakes to that point. It's the point when he has a choice to fully commit to being the walking dead or save some sliver of his humanity.
I like that the enemy is a disembodied voice, nice touch. Your actor was very good, very internal performance without going over the top. I had doubts about this when it started because VO sends up red flags, but the interaction between the killer and the girl worked so well that I have no doubt you can work with actors.
Great location choices and production design. The newspapers on the wall, the crappy cellphone, and that long hallway all add to the mood. In fact I think a lot of people don't realize just how much art direction adds to a film. And you've done it tastefully and realisistically. It had a nice grittiness to it.
Finally, I really appreciate that you told a complete story with a beginning middle and end. It's much harder to do this than to create a scene that feels part of something larger. So kudos for telling a very strong complete story in six minutes.
This is definitely in my top 3. :thumbup:
And this was very well executed, my only technical complaint was that tracking shot in the diner. It cut off the actors heads. The confrontation with the girl in the parking lot was very well done.
I loved that your film built and raised the stakes to that point. It's the point when he has a choice to fully commit to being the walking dead or save some sliver of his humanity.
I like that the enemy is a disembodied voice, nice touch. Your actor was very good, very internal performance without going over the top. I had doubts about this when it started because VO sends up red flags, but the interaction between the killer and the girl worked so well that I have no doubt you can work with actors.
Great location choices and production design. The newspapers on the wall, the crappy cellphone, and that long hallway all add to the mood. In fact I think a lot of people don't realize just how much art direction adds to a film. And you've done it tastefully and realisistically. It had a nice grittiness to it.
Finally, I really appreciate that you told a complete story with a beginning middle and end. It's much harder to do this than to create a scene that feels part of something larger. So kudos for telling a very strong complete story in six minutes.
This is definitely in my top 3. :thumbup:
Nice work. Every shot had a purpose, everything in the frame was necessary. Very thoughtfully done.
VO is a hard thing to use. Yes, it is often used as a crutch, to explain. But, we have all these "rules" or accepted protocols for filmmaking, and if we always stick to them things get boring. By purposefully, thoughtfully, and selectively breaking the rules we can create something far more interesting. I think you used the VO quite well, and since it was balanced with such engaging and descriptive action, it didn't seem overbearing or unnecessary to me.
VO is a hard thing to use. Yes, it is often used as a crutch, to explain. But, we have all these "rules" or accepted protocols for filmmaking, and if we always stick to them things get boring. By purposefully, thoughtfully, and selectively breaking the rules we can create something far more interesting. I think you used the VO quite well, and since it was balanced with such engaging and descriptive action, it didn't seem overbearing or unnecessary to me.
Geoff_R
Veteran
(As Batman says in 'Batman Begins') Nice...
Really digging your cinematography and story. Production value is high and consistent across the film; everything works well together to make a solid short film. Your story is what makes this short shine. Very interesting concept/premise.
I loved how he draws the weapon in the end and we cut to black. I was waiting for the 'shot' and then we faded back in and he starts to question his actions...probably my favorite beat from this short.
Visual speaking, my favorite shots occur in that long corridor when he gets the phone call. Great location and framing/dof for those shots.
It looks like you used a 35 adapter for the majority of the shots, correct? But you didn't use it for when he's in that room by himself with all the newspapers? Lighting concerns or aesthetic choice?
Really digging your cinematography and story. Production value is high and consistent across the film; everything works well together to make a solid short film. Your story is what makes this short shine. Very interesting concept/premise.
I loved how he draws the weapon in the end and we cut to black. I was waiting for the 'shot' and then we faded back in and he starts to question his actions...probably my favorite beat from this short.
Visual speaking, my favorite shots occur in that long corridor when he gets the phone call. Great location and framing/dof for those shots.
It looks like you used a 35 adapter for the majority of the shots, correct? But you didn't use it for when he's in that room by himself with all the newspapers? Lighting concerns or aesthetic choice?
aravance
Well-known member
I actually only used the 35 adapter for the corridor scenes. Everything else was just the stock HVX.
Most of it had to do with lighting concerns. I did want to use it for the apartment scenes, but somebody had broken my m2 by that point of filming, so I was forced to go without. But I'm okay with how it looked, even if it is a bit sharp. I just actually received my fixed 35mm adapter back today, thank God.
Most of it had to do with lighting concerns. I did want to use it for the apartment scenes, but somebody had broken my m2 by that point of filming, so I was forced to go without. But I'm okay with how it looked, even if it is a bit sharp. I just actually received my fixed 35mm adapter back today, thank God.
Not too sure about expanding this exact story into a feature. Perhaps the basic theme and premise, but I don't think you have enough story right now to pull off a full feature. You could possibly expand to a longer short film tho. I thought this overall looked really good and had a very interesting story. Good work!
aravance
Well-known member
After giving it a lot more thought, talking with my team, and listening to everyone's opinion, I've decided to NOT expand this into a feature. At least not right now. The themes that I wanted to get across work in the short film format, and I feel there wouldn't be anyway to keep them intact if it was expanded. It really would become an entirely different movie altogether.
We still plan on releasing a longer version of the short film, but after that we will be moving on to other projects.
I have a couple of stories I'm working on right now that I'm really excited about getting off the ground. One is another short film and the other is a feature film.
I don't know how to take down the poll....any help?
We still plan on releasing a longer version of the short film, but after that we will be moving on to other projects.
I have a couple of stories I'm working on right now that I'm really excited about getting off the ground. One is another short film and the other is a feature film.
I don't know how to take down the poll....any help?
bokser
Active member
I really loved the film, what made it for me was
THE STORY... I do want to see a featur emade of this, and I thought that immediately upon seeing the film.
But here is some critique
For the feature, use a better actor. This guy had the look but I didn't believe him too much, even with that I still loved the film.
When your shots are great, they're great, like the first shot and the music... ohhhh sweeeeeet! keep mor eof that feel. Cant wait to see more. Good luck!
THE STORY... I do want to see a featur emade of this, and I thought that immediately upon seeing the film.
But here is some critique
For the feature, use a better actor. This guy had the look but I didn't believe him too much, even with that I still loved the film.
When your shots are great, they're great, like the first shot and the music... ohhhh sweeeeeet! keep mor eof that feel. Cant wait to see more. Good luck!
aravance
Well-known member
This one got my vote for best SpyFest short. Although a couple of others exhibited a comparable level of technical merit, none told a story as well as your's did.
I would absolutely expand this into a longer form project, though I think you might consider that episodic TV could be another place for it. Within each episode, you have the potential to reveal a little more about this world he lives in - are the rest of the affected population quarantined or dead?
Who put this virus out there - maybe the same people who have hired him to kill his marks? Why? Perhaps he is working for an insurgency - people who have figured out that a world government launched the virus in a campaign to change the world order. Or is he killing the very people who lead this resistance?
I think you've probably explored concepts like this, but think about how you could introduce new characters each week - and how his contacts would act as recurring ones. Perhaps he crosses the line when he spares this girl - opening his eyes to a small part of the bigger picture. Whatever is between them, she'll eventually have someone else after her. It would be a race against his own mortality and the threat of their collaboration being discovered.
It could be really interesting to see this develop over two seasons.
With a small feature, you have the same ability to expand the concept and a much higher likelihood of getting it made. Still, I think TV would make an interesting future home for the base concept.
You can launch your own Lost franchise after the feature posts some good numbers!
e
hahaha...I think you've thought about this more than I have!!
Very good ideas overall. Some of your suggestions are actually pretty close to what the bigger story is, although I won't say which.
I definitely think doing something episodic in the future is a possibility. It's somewhat an uncharted territory, which is kinda exciting. Pretty soon webisodes are going to start having their own format like television...with the beats and commercial breaks, all within a smaller time frame to hold people's attention.
Thanks for all the input!
MojoTrancer
Well-known member
Excellent entry!!! The cinematography was right on the money. There are some great camera moves and angles in this film. I enjoyed the story as well. My only gripe (and its a small one) would be about how she survived the first attempt on her life. What was the stuff that was put in her drink, and how did it not work?
Once again, great film!!!
Once again, great film!!!
Shawn Philip Nelson
Veteran
Wow...
Dude, this is an amazing short film. The first one so far that has blown me away. Very, very good accomplishment.
Dude, this is an amazing short film. The first one so far that has blown me away. Very, very good accomplishment.