I need some career advice

Holy cow I watched 2 minutes of those AMR videos in a not ideal space and not ideal mindset and I still started to feel chills... crazy.
 
Adding a couple of thoughts to an already helpful collection...

One thing that has changed in our world is the constant repurposing of old ideas and approaches. As some have already mentioned, the use of video 5 years ago has changed and will keep changing as time goes on. We are in an 'adapt or die' flow now. As such, having a business mindset with freelance and treating your skills/experience as resources for developing products is helpful. When you think this way, you can apply basic business principles to what you do. For example, your product ('Interview videos' for example) has to solve a current problem your intended (identified) customer needs. This is critical for any company that is selling wares in a grocery store, big box electronics, or online. Do you know a) who your potential customers are b) what problem they have that your resources can solve and c) can you help them see how it will help them. Get those three ideas together for each aspect of what your services are and be ready to find new applications (products).

The other thought is to look at owning your own content as another stream of income. The changing world has made publishing and selling available to anyone with the guts to push into it. There are countless ways to do this (ASMR example above noted). Think about what you have information/passion in and find a way to explore it. If anything, this will give you insight into the whole cycle of content development, including the measurement and engagement of the media. This will help you provide more value to your clients than just handing over a finished video. If you have a hobby, guess what?! You need to invest more time in it and see how you can create content around it. It could help with a number of aspects of your life, even your current mental health issues.

One thing I have done is to invest more time into stock video. This is for a few reasons. It helps me practice some of the areas I am weak in with my work (casting, directing, scripting, etc.). I get to collaborate with others, even if it's just talent and me. Finally, in the stock world, video can be fairly lucrative. If you dial yourself into the market, you can generate a nice little side income that will keep flowing (or trickling in). It gives me some control over my circumstances and projects to work on when I am slow. I always feel better about life when I am working, whether I am getting paid or not.

Don't give up. Just take each day as a fresh start that is full of hope.

-gl
 
Hey everyone.
I know I've been MIA for the past month. Things got really busy. But I did read every reply to this thread and I really appreciated all the words of encouragement and advice everyone has given me. I've applied some of it in the last month.

I've been busy doing a lot of shoots and edits, and even some edits I didn't shoot, where the client didn't like the initial edit from the person who shot it. Apparently I'm getting a reputation as someone who has an emotional/impactful editing style that my clients and their clients like. So that's good news.

As for my problem client. I set some boundaries and things have gotten better. I considered dropping him, but I don't like to leave money on the table.
Still a bit of a headache compared to the other clients, but manageable now. I'm not desperate to have him and I figure that so long as it's manageable and I'm making some coin, fine. If things get crazy, then we go our separate ways. We've barely had any in person meetings since I mentioned I roll the cost of them into my editing time.
That said, I'm still a bit iffy about certain things he does. Like trying to roll pick-up shots for one client's shoot into the same day as another client's shoot (his clients not mine). But so long as I get paid what I want and I'm not driving all over town, that's fine.

Things are still stressful on the life front in general, but I take one day at a time. I need to be out of my current rental house by the end of September and I'm stressed about how I'm going to get another place considering I don't have a consistent income anymore, like I've had for the last decade previously. Everything I've found is also twice the price of what I've been paying, so that's not helpful. But I don't want to sink so the only thing I can do is swim, so I'm swimming.
 
Glad to hear that. I know i had no advice, but read and thought about what you were doing. Thanks for the update. Encouraging.
 
Just keep on beating your arms and legs in water - you will keep floating. It takes time to get all the necessary clients for comfortable revenue flow. Just don't quit. Many people have told me that after quitting they get lot of jobs.

When the work is slow, you may try taking up some personal projects. It will help improve your creativity and different set of clients may like those. There is no fixed way of becoming successful.

And when you feel down don't get into any intoxicants. Just come here and share and someone or the other will comment.
 
Well it's been over five months since my last update.
Things got bad for me and continue to be bad. I think I had a bit of a mental breakdown at one point and haven't been able to get out of it since. My ability to travel has been limited to about two miles from home for the last few months. Which really sucks.
We got into an apartment at the end of September. Maybe only a mile or less from where our old rental house was. It was the only place I could get into with my unstable income. It's not the greatest but not bad. It has nice floors and a bigger living room area but no on-site laundry or dishwasher like what we had in the house we were renting.

The problem client is no longer a problem client because I haven't been able to do any work for him. He ended up being a nice guy overall, but we'll see how that pans out depending on if I get this last check from him or not. It's been about a month since I invoiced him. I haven't done any new work for him since my range became really limited.

I've been doing edits for another couple of clients. Really only one that has been consistent and those are about to run out. I haven't shot anything new in months. The one client is a good friend of mine and we had lunch this past Friday. He understands my situation completely and as he says if I could travel the state I'd be making bank right now because it's a political season. But he knows I can't and is throwing me edits where he can. Unfortunately I can't even get to my sister's house across town for the holidays or even the Best Buy four miles down the street. So yeah I'm in a pretty tough situation. Other than that, I'm fine and in high spirits. I'm not depressed or anything, I just can't seem to travel more than a couple miles from home. It's really strange. I guess I'm depressed about that. But that's situational. Other than that I'm fine. Usually in a good mood and pretty optimistic.

I'm looking for a local job. Something that can help me pay my bills and I can get to. There is an Amazon warehouse a half mile from me and I'm kinda hoping I can get in there somehow because other than that there is really only grocery stores and fast food joints around me. I mean there are plenty of other industrial type buildings, but I have no idea what goes on inside them.

So yeah 2019 and even 2018 have been rough years. I'm hoping and working on the new year being better, but right now I'm in a hole I don't know how to get out of.

For the time being to keep myself busy I've gone back and started recutting/remastering my first feature that was shot back in 2003. My editing back then was pretty destructive and I've wanted to do a new cut and HD uprez for years now. So now I've got the time. It's keeping my mind busy and giving me a goal.

I'm working on getting better, despite not really knowing how to do that. That said, if you see my C100s show up in the for sale section in the next month or so, don't be surprised. I haven't used them for client work in months. I think I'm holding on to them more out of hope than anything. But I also know that the longer I hold onto them the more they lose value and I never even made enough money to pay them off. I've just been trying to stay afloat the last year. So I don't want to sell them at a loss, if I don't have to. I'd like to just keep them as permanent cameras the way I have my GH4 and my old school DV camera and my Nikon FE. You know, where things get to a point where it's more valuable for you to keep them than to sell them. Even if just for nostalgic reasons or because they're good to have.

Anyway, that's my update. It's not a great update, but I'm still holding on for now and I'm still fighting. Hoping I just lost a few battles and not the war. Thanks for reading. :)
 
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I don't know why this didn't occur to me until now but I've got the shooting gear, I've got a couple clients and the editing skills. If I could find someone to go out with my gear and do the shoots, they could bring the footage back to me for the edits. I could pay them for their shoot time minus a little off the top for using my gear and I could get the editing money. But it would have to be someone decently skilled with reliable transportation and a flexible schedule (weekdays mostly). Hmm.
 
You must get professional help immediately. You can see that you are in a downward spiral. Contact your health provider if you have one. Tell them your problem. They will get you in touch with the right people. If you don't have a health care professional, call your county health department. They will help you. I've been through disabling anxiety. 10 weeks after seeking help, I was cured/fixed/fine. I've never had a relapse.
CALL NOW. NO EXCUSES!
 
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Agreed. You need professional help. What you are experiencing is not healthy. A mental health professional can and will help you. Don't put it off, call someone ASAP.
 
Hi Paul,
Yeah I definitely do. I was seeing a therapist for about a month but then as things started closing in on me her office became too far away for me to get to.
I am trying to get in at another place just down the street from me. A place my doctor recommended, but all they have is a voice mailbox and I haven't gotten any callbacks yet.
Still trying though.

Glad things worked out for you. Hope the same is true for me.
 
Could you travel further if somebody accompanied you? I have had a medicated anxiety disorder for 10 years so i understand to some degree what you are going through. It is a daily, hourly battle isn't it? Dealing with it is all about acceptance and then strategising how to get through it/past it.
I have been through all kinds of medication and therapy. The two things that helped me the most were acupuncture and drinking copious amounts of water! and the water was suggested by my acupuncturist so she is my favourite person in the world. Do not dismiss diet and hydration. I know it sounds trivial but the effect it has on us is much more than people realise. Right before every job I drink a litre of water and it calms me down. For me it is like breathing exercises. I cannot quite believe how much effect it has. Everybody's anxiety is different I am sure and I can only relate my experience but you have to find a way to get to some help. Maybe find a help line with somebody who can listen as a start so you don't have to leave the house.
I truly wish you good luck.
 
Patrick,
I very rarely have any kind of anxiety that pops up out of nowhere at home anymore. That used to be what I dealt with all the time but I managed and it just seemed to go away. Today it's only travel based anxiety I deal with. Distance specifically, so it doesn't matter if someone drives with me. In fact I prefer to drive myself. More control. Though today I can have someone else in the drivers seat without it getting to me. That said it's more about distance than anything.

Eric
Strangely enough that occurred to me. I did move three months ago so my association with what is home moved with me. So it's transferrable. Which I guess is good. But still what is it about the place(s) I'm living at that I feel this link of safety and why can't I seem to transfer that to wherever I am at any given time? And yeah what would happen if I didn't have a home. Would it cure me or would I end up living in some tree? I have no idea. Sometimes I wonder if there is some voodoo doll hidden in some box I have here at home keeping me tied to it. I'm kidding of course but what is it really that makes something a home and a place a safety?
 
Just buy and travel around in an RV like I do. That way you can travel all over the country while never having to be further than a mile from your home.

GREAT IDEA! It also allows you to keep your equipment close by. And, frankly, it would probably be an asset for clients having a bathroom nearby at all locations (no kidding - it would set you apart from the other small to mid-size production companies!).

On a side note: I've had (have) agoraphobia for almost 30 years. Yes, diet and behavior/relaxation are definitely helpful. But don't discount medication. It helped me travel and I successfully managed 2 decades producing at an agency and then another decade freelancing. I raised a family and we traveled for many great vacations.

Good luck, my friend!
 
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