first dvx 100b short

Oh boy can I relate to the main character. I have Celiac Disease (or Celiac Sprue) and I can't eat wheat, barley rye, and in the past, oats. Didn't even happen until last summer. It definately sucks having to change you diet drastically.

haha, anyway, I thought it was pretty funny. The dialogue was really well done for doing it in 24 hours, and him getting hit with the sandwich was awesome.

I love how you have others influencing him to continue eating it, because that is exactly what happens. People don't understand the extent of the problem and figure it's ok to cheat. Well, in my condition, it's not ok to cheat. and when I do, I can't do it often.

and the end was just perfect! Great way to go with it.

I really enjoyed it. good job.
 
I'm sorry I couldn't keep watching it because your constant panning was driving me nuts.
 
Hahhaa... yeah... good dialogue. Actually... the story and characters drew me away from any technical stuff. The patriotic father was halarious.

jg
 
hehe really enjoyed it, here are some comments:

The audio levels were inconsistant throughout the movie. You should checkout your color correction tab in your NLE. Start using it and youll soon learn how very powerful a tool it can be. Acting was pretty decent but the sound really through me off every now and then ( also the father sounds wayyy to young lol, and could greatly benefit from an acting class) the editing was smooth.

You can also get some really cheap lights just to light the area, characters were really blacked out in most of the scenes.

but much better than my first short. ;) LEts see more!
 
I agree with most of the already-posted comments and have a few suggestions of my own:

Were you going for an intentionally shaky style in the conversation with the doctor? If so, (while I'm opposed to the look in the first place) go all out on it. As you did it, it was just kind of annoyingly shaky. If you were looking for a "Trafficesque" look, you need to add more zooms, pull in and out of focus, and really illustrate his terror at losing the white. Also, a more colorful/interesting background for the doctor would have been nice.

If it was not intentional, please find a tripod.

Again, this is all meant to be constructive, and a six+ minute video in 24 hours is quite impressive, especially one of that caliber.

JC
 
This reminded me of a bad american pie, but some of the shots and acting were good. Pretty funny though.
 
the hand held i was going for consciously, but i was not aiming for a long take, it was hard to edit the shots together from the angles i chose and with improved dialogue... the lighting i know was weak, we barely had any at all... the last scene in the kitchen was really bad lighting because i was acting (terribly) so i didn't have much control over the image
 
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