Great Job, especially for a student.
I think you're good to publish this as is. But you seem to be a perfectionist, so few things...
I don't see a problem with the pacing at the end.
The turnstyle cuts work as is.
Me likes the sign language. It's kind of cold hearted of her, at least to me it seems, and something a pissed of woman would do for spite.
The hands at the window - OVERDONE AND WAY PLAYED OUT. At the very least, cut the shot down. Right now you have a wide then a CU of the hands, pick one shot and make it short.
I think, next time, look for more closeups just to get a more dynamic video. You have several times where you're cutting band footage all through wide shots and I really want to get closer. Definetely use more cu of instruments, guitars, drum sticks if you could.
For the beginning, the wide shot of the arm hanging down by the bed doesn't work for me. it's awkwardly framed, and again, your cutting wide shot with another wideshot, which tends to be boring. You need a CU of his hand, or nothing at all. The shot as is distracts me and I'd say you'd be better off just leaving it out and just starting the video with the slow zoom until he wakes up.
Also there's a shot where you move the camera all the way up as the band enters the door and cut to the girl waiting at the train station - it's a bit of an awkward cut. Cutting movement to static shots can be troublesome, but try to cut the tilt up the door earlier, so we're not looking at a boring ceiling at the end of that shot. More so the cut is awkward because the last band member kind of enters the door too late to see her as you tilt up, but all you can do now is re edit.
Awesome work, can't wait to see another.
I think you're good to publish this as is. But you seem to be a perfectionist, so few things...
I don't see a problem with the pacing at the end.
The turnstyle cuts work as is.
Me likes the sign language. It's kind of cold hearted of her, at least to me it seems, and something a pissed of woman would do for spite.
The hands at the window - OVERDONE AND WAY PLAYED OUT. At the very least, cut the shot down. Right now you have a wide then a CU of the hands, pick one shot and make it short.
I think, next time, look for more closeups just to get a more dynamic video. You have several times where you're cutting band footage all through wide shots and I really want to get closer. Definetely use more cu of instruments, guitars, drum sticks if you could.
For the beginning, the wide shot of the arm hanging down by the bed doesn't work for me. it's awkwardly framed, and again, your cutting wide shot with another wideshot, which tends to be boring. You need a CU of his hand, or nothing at all. The shot as is distracts me and I'd say you'd be better off just leaving it out and just starting the video with the slow zoom until he wakes up.
Also there's a shot where you move the camera all the way up as the band enters the door and cut to the girl waiting at the train station - it's a bit of an awkward cut. Cutting movement to static shots can be troublesome, but try to cut the tilt up the door earlier, so we're not looking at a boring ceiling at the end of that shot. More so the cut is awkward because the last band member kind of enters the door too late to see her as you tilt up, but all you can do now is re edit.
Awesome work, can't wait to see another.
BrandonC said:
