commercial I made

C

corycross

Well-known member
Heres a commercial I made. I made up the script, drew out angles, did most of the work, filmed/ edited, and my friend Dan helped with holding the boom mic. Took about 4 hours all together to film, and about 4-6 hours to edit.. it was late last night and I got sucked into editing and time pretty much flew by.. but check it out and lemme know what people think.

filmed with dvx100A



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b94riQlGUYQ
 
The commercial was WAY too slow. Had I been watching it on TV I would of changed channels right after he struggled to get his introduction out.

With a commercial advertising a product I think it would be better to leave the viewer wanting more rather than listing all the features.

Also, the how to section needed to be cut up quicker. Instead of showing every motion just cut to basic steps. Open, wrap, loop, drop, and sit. 2 seconds. Done.

As for your cinematography. I liked a lot of the angles you choose. They worked pretty well.
 
ha ooh im sorry!

Its not a commercial for tv, its for a convention hes going to be at showing the product off. He wanted the video a minute long and play it in the background on a tv while he has the product sitting out and answering questions
 
Yeah, it seemed like the spokesperson was speaking in slow motion which made the commercial feel quite awkward. But I did like some of the cinematography and the "donkey" joke was a kicker!
 
Thanks. the spokemans was actually 1 of the guys who invented it, the other guy was the one in the donkey costume, haha.. but anyways, I am actually going to post up another one I re-edited, becuase I thought it needed a little bit of pop at the end. so im gonna upload it, and post it back up

thanks everyone

-Cory
 
He did good, he's just a little nervous or self conscious.

I would reshoot for better framing and pacing but you guys did good and practice makes perfect!

Thanks for sharing and keep up the good work! :thumbsup:
 
Thanks a lot guys! yea, I would agree, I deffently wasnt happy with 1 of the shots, but its the only good one we got of him smiling and talking.. I might switch 1 thing around.. but thanks guys, we filmed it in 4 hours, I edited it all last night and this morning, because he needed it for tomorrow at a convention where he will be playing it for 3 conventions

Thanks guys a lot!
 
haha I just got a call from them and they love the video, but they want me to actually take the jack ass joke out!!GAAH .haha im upset, I thought that was a good part. oh well, thanks guys for ur thoughts. all what I was hoping to fix for next video shoot forsure
 
Oh I loved the jackass joke! But yeah, I guess if it's being shown at a convention I could see why they wouldn't want it. What a bummer. That happened to me once too though. I edited a video for this group of people, and it was gonna be shown at this place (can't remember what it was). Anyways there was this part in the video where someone made a funny reference to "passing gas" and they wanted me to take it out; haha!
 
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hahaha damn dude, thats hilarious. but sucks. ooh well, I am gonna re-edit and get it to him by tomorrow

thanks everyone for the stories and constructive criticism
 
cory I think its fine for what it is. You could reiterate points when he is making them though. I assume people at a convention may struggle to hear words, so when he says load tested to 800 pounds, flash it up etc.
 
good point, I will incorporate words as well.. so far I am taking out the donkey part from his request, and adding shots of the product while he says different qualities about it in its place.. im going to add shots like the show "how its made" I have some pretty smooth shots of the product and putting a gradient type look on it where the top of the image is very warm... im also adding website links and more words as well

thanks everyone
 
Looks great. I agree that there's too much space above the head, but it's nothing too bad.

I was actually going to suggest taking the ass joke out. Even though it's really funny, I agree with the people that told you to take it out. It's not really suitable for a convention with kids around or people that take offense easily.

That seat looks handy too. Have you tried it, is it comfortable? How do the sides stay up? I'm not a hunter, but it still seems cool.
 
Jon Starr said:
That seat looks handy too. Have you tried it, is it comfortable? How do the sides stay up? I'm not a hunter, but it still seems cool.
Click to expand...

I agree. How many times have you been shooting (with a camera) would love to sit down and all there is are trees? Well not often for me, but still.
 
This seems like an excellent product. The, I guess, "Info-mmercial" was good. The guy was talking way to slow. Obviously not an actor, but that's okay. I guess it would have been better if he was a little more animated and excited about HIS product. I think the product's a winner, definately.

I also agree with the other thread about emphasizing the points that he makes about the product - weight and etc.

Overall, good job.
 
thanks guys, actually the product is great! is sturdy, and he says tested to hold 850 pounds I believe, but actually he showed me footage from his crappy hi-def camera about how they picked up a 3,000 pound car with it, which was pretty impressive..

so yea, I am actually doing a commercial for him later, I will deffently keep in mind the shots of too much head room, and also get him to be more animated about his product.. But thanks everyone again.. haha it was a fun time making it for him because after the script was allready made, and I drew up angles to go with how I was going to edit it, and as soon as I got there, he had it all changed, so I kinda went with the flow on how to film.haha

T
-Cory
 
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