"Circles"

Good story, and despite it's complications, I found it very easy to follow. It takes a lot to keep the audience engaged without the use of any dialogue- even for 6 minutes! So nice work.

It was interesting to follow the ring throughout the entire film and to see what effect it had on all the other characters. What's impressive is that you were able to come full circle and make it believable, despite your time limitation.

The only part that threw me was that the wife would leave her husband when she found the other ring in the car. To me, it's such a simple explanation (of I found it) that he could probably explain himself without needing to kill himself. So I guess I didn't connect the dots here that he had obviously done something wrong in the past and that she has zero trust in him.

Other than that, though, I really enjoyed it! Nice work!
 
Again, thanks for the comments and criticisms. They are all valid and valuable in this, as in any, learning process.
@Tim, I think one of my weakness's as a storyteller is cramming too much in...as it turns out 6 minutes is very short indeed! There were a lot of shots we had to cut that would have made the story instantly more fluid in terms of understanding. As it was we locked it at 6:09 and 12 frames (with the DVXUser leader) :)
@Jason, the funny thing is, I have been involved in audiobook creation for a relatively long while (not just stories with narration but full sound canvas's with dragon screams, explosions and mechanical monsters...layers and layer and layers of them). So, given more time I would have added what I consider a full 'spec' edition...and I am extremely obsessive about sound. I say this not in excuse but to let you know (Dre83 too) that I agree with you!!!
@ Marlon - yeah the slap had me laughing a bit. The light was fading and I couldn't convince Kana (Mika) to actually cherry-up the side of Patrick's (Shingo-Joe) face :) Another area we can improve on!
@ dre83...man you were too busy looking at Kana's legs (sorry that's an assumption)!!! There are two shots where the hole and the ring are right there :) I shots those shots specifically because I knew there would be confusion otherwise. I'm with you on the sound design front, as that used to be my job! Also let me say, I really appreciate your willingness to speak your mind in reviewing these films. Sometimes it's difficult to say what you think when you know the intense amount of work it takes to get a project like this done. We shouldn't be insulated like that!!!!
Cheers all and I still owe some of you my own thoughts on your entries...I'll get there.
Sam.
 
Circles, perfect title for this circular film.

Circles, perfect title for this circular film.

This film was one that seemed to be felt rather than followed. It was easy to follow, but the reason I say that is that so much was compressed into such a short time space, it seems to say something else in a philosophical way. Quite a philosophical edge to this compressed story I mean.

Technically I enjoyed the angles you chose. Enjoyed the little school girls scene, quite natural and they added a good variety to yo' characters. They were quite good.

Your selection to make a silent film added to the philosophical edge. The music was quite appropriate also.

One thing took me out of the story-one actor's performance seemed to scream "INDICATION" in places. The slap scene near the end was one example of that.

Loved the locations, and the cinematography which made it quite dream-like, a memory.

Interested to see what you do next!
 
If this film had been made in 1920, we would all be studying it now in 2010. That being said it lacks a certain sophistication that has become commonplace in modern cinema. The fact that you can tell such an understandable story with no dialog whatsoever means you're an incredible filmmaker. F.W. Murnau would be proud.

I look forward to more of your work.
 
Beautiful images! I like the way you worked the text into the film...very creative.
Great camera work, I liked the variety of angles used. The music was a little much for my taste at times.
Actors did a great job. Solid story...and those kids...too cute!

Really good effort for a first film and I look forward to seeing what you come up with next.
Congratulations to the cast & crew!
 
OK, everybody loves this one, so I guess I'm going to come across as the bad guy.

I think this film needs some cutting down. (Timewise....not ripping apart, let me clarify)

The scene with the little girls fighting over the ring goes on forever. It was also mentioned to tighten up some scenes with dialogue if we can't actually hear what's going on.

It's too hard for me to grasp that the wife wouldn't take Kenji's word about the ring and then he would go so far as to kill himself. It's just a far stretch for me to believe this part of the story. Milage will obviously vary from viewer to viewer.

Also backing up, I think the ring was in no way in his line of sight, I question how he'd see it near his car. Perhaps a different placing of the ring & camera angle would have been better.

Some shots good, some not so good in my book. Example: I don't like the scene where Kenji pulls up and his wife finds the ring. Everything is too blue.

I like how the word Circles comes up as she's walking up the stairs. That to me is powerful. Ending is good. Great closing shot.

Great job, I'm just the guy who wasn't 100% sold on it.
 
Last edited:
Deepfocuse88, absolutely no need to apologize for providing honest criticism (and if you've seen the finalist list then you'll know not 'everyone' loves it :) )

Let me address what you've said.
Re: Kids fighting scene, the length of that was because of my bad direction....when edit time came around we had to try like hell to make things flow with the shots we had and as a result, there were some shots that we had to use when, with better planning, I could have captured more preferred moments...and we shot A LOT for that scene. In short, I agree with you.

Re: Kenji and his wife - I guess I have been in or seen situations where a partner is completely non-trusting. Even so their manipulative and controlling actions don't prevent their better halves from being head over heels in love. Seriously, this wasn't a leap at all for me (mostly from watching some people around me in their relationships)... BUT I can understand your point! My intended implication with such an abrupt and complete reaction was that Kenji might have earned it through past betrayal...or maybe his wife is a psycho :) (in reality his wife, off screen as well as on, is just fantastic!)

RE: the car scene...initial shooting and color correction FK ups can all be laid squarely at my feet. I wanted a bleak feel to the movie so tried washing things out with some blue....on top of that (and for a reason I haven't remembered) I shot without my ND filter so everything looked either overexposed or under (in the same shot....blah). Technically, that sequence was my least favourite although our actress and actor did a great job!!

RE: finding the ring near the car... I don't know about that one... A bright day, reflection, a sparkling ring in gravel....stranger things have happened. I've found stuff like that... maybe I should pick my frigging head up :) I guess we disagree on that one. The camera angle was completely intentional as the ring was a main 'actor in that scene(as well as the entire story) and so I wanted to shoot from it's perspective.

At the end of the day, I'm really pleased you (and a lot of other people) could pick it to pieces. Makes our next project so much easier (we'll see). I greatly appreciate it!!!!
On a side note, I've really gotta get out and review more people's films....so many films so little time!!!
Cheers,
Sam.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top