Would you rather...
- Thread starter HBlack
- Start date
mikkowilson
Steadi-Guru
How big is the knife?
Are we talking Mac Gyver, or Croc. Dundee here?
Also, is the pitbull armed?
- Mikko
Are we talking Mac Gyver, or Croc. Dundee here?
Also, is the pitbull armed?
- Mikko
Jim Brennan
VHS Member Old Skool
Well, I've been attacked by a pitbull (and a doberman, and a norwegian elkhound, and a rottweiller...). Time for something new. BRING ME MIDGETS!
Luis Caffesse
Admin
Heaven forbid we have any 'little people' members who happen to own pitbulls on this board... then we'll definitely see some angry midgets.
Luis Caffesse
Admin
I can't help but notice that the one constant in that equation is you....
What are you a mailman? How does one person get attacked by so many dogs?
HorseFilms
Look ma no hands
Yeah, Jim. Are you wearing some sort of meat necklace?
tmnt
King of Australia
Dude it's not pc to say 'angry midgets', try 'angry little mutherf**kers'.
Terry_Lasater
All about the Caption
In the words of Norm from Cheers, "It's a dog-eat-dog World and I'm wearing Milkbone underwear.".
Jim Brennan
VHS Member Old Skool
Wow, those are disturbing pictures.
Yes I was a mailman for about 4 years.
The first one (Norwegian Elkhound) was the worst. Tore my leg open. Most dogbites are puncture marks, so nobody was in a rush at the ER to see mine. After they took a look there was a stream of doctors, nurses and med students coming through to look at my leg. Lots of stitches.
The upside was that I won a lawsuit and was able to buy a new Ovation, an Alesis Synth and put some in the bank. That dog had previously attacked a kid, so the county made them put it down.
The pitbull never actually bit me. I was putting mail in a box, leaning over a 4 foot cinderblock wall. There was this little kid standing there, pit bull barking like crazy next to him. The dog starts trying to get over the wall and the kid looks at me and says, calm as can be:
"He's coming for you"
Sure enough, that dog got over the wall. I backpedaled down the lawn and into the middle of the street, emptying my can of pepper spray into its face as I went. Just as I got to the middle of the street, the can emptied, I tripped and fell on my back. I thought that was the end of me. But by then the spray started to take effect and the dog got distracted enough for me to get away.
The other ones hurt, but I got attacked from behind (and bit in the behind), so they arent as interesting.
The thing about dog attacks is that you have no concept of how fast and strong a dog can be until they are coming after you. I was in my late 20's then. I am 6'2", and 190. I've been in a few scraps and can hold my own pretty well. I was a chew toy man. I was punching the crap out of the elkhoud as he was eating my leg. Didn't phase him at all.
So yeah. My colleagues called me "milkbone", "rusty" (which is what they call the mechanical rabbit at dog tracks I guess), "meat" and bought me barbeque sauce for my legs.
Sadly, it's part of the job. I'll take the midgets.
Yes I was a mailman for about 4 years.
The first one (Norwegian Elkhound) was the worst. Tore my leg open. Most dogbites are puncture marks, so nobody was in a rush at the ER to see mine. After they took a look there was a stream of doctors, nurses and med students coming through to look at my leg. Lots of stitches.
The upside was that I won a lawsuit and was able to buy a new Ovation, an Alesis Synth and put some in the bank. That dog had previously attacked a kid, so the county made them put it down.
The pitbull never actually bit me. I was putting mail in a box, leaning over a 4 foot cinderblock wall. There was this little kid standing there, pit bull barking like crazy next to him. The dog starts trying to get over the wall and the kid looks at me and says, calm as can be:
"He's coming for you"
Sure enough, that dog got over the wall. I backpedaled down the lawn and into the middle of the street, emptying my can of pepper spray into its face as I went. Just as I got to the middle of the street, the can emptied, I tripped and fell on my back. I thought that was the end of me. But by then the spray started to take effect and the dog got distracted enough for me to get away.
The other ones hurt, but I got attacked from behind (and bit in the behind), so they arent as interesting.
The thing about dog attacks is that you have no concept of how fast and strong a dog can be until they are coming after you. I was in my late 20's then. I am 6'2", and 190. I've been in a few scraps and can hold my own pretty well. I was a chew toy man. I was punching the crap out of the elkhoud as he was eating my leg. Didn't phase him at all.
So yeah. My colleagues called me "milkbone", "rusty" (which is what they call the mechanical rabbit at dog tracks I guess), "meat" and bought me barbeque sauce for my legs.
Sadly, it's part of the job. I'll take the midgets.
I second that.
My dog encounter: A dirty little street dog, probably weighed 30 lbs. He must have been some kinda alpha mutt--started growling, so I kicked him in the ribs, Hard! BAM! direct hit, that sucker barely flinched. He didn't back down. My next move, softball sized chunk of concrete, I can throw hard (90mph fastball in HS). Again, direct hit, didn't phase that thing.
Please, bring on the dwarfs. I'll fight the dog, but instead of a knife I'll need one of those TOW anti tank guns or maybe a flame thrower--animals fear fire you know...
HBlack
Underage Member
I'm not sure if that's disturbing or hilarious.
Jim Brennan
VHS Member Old Skool
Hilarious now.
VERY disturbing then
They try and prepare you for this stuff. THey go on about no matter how badass you think you are, a dog will own you. It's true.
Now there have been times I scared off a dog, and knowing when to be aggressive helps, because sometimes they will back down. But if it sets its mind to come after you, good luck.
I used to carry a collapsible baton. Not once did I have the time to get it out when it mattered most.
VERY disturbing then
They try and prepare you for this stuff. THey go on about no matter how badass you think you are, a dog will own you. It's true.
Now there have been times I scared off a dog, and knowing when to be aggressive helps, because sometimes they will back down. But if it sets its mind to come after you, good luck.
I used to carry a collapsible baton. Not once did I have the time to get it out when it mattered most.
Capt Quirk
Veteran
I'll take on all four... if the price is right. I have had pit bulls come after me, and the trick is, to remember you have opposable thumbs and are at the top of the food chain. I remember two different occasions, the first was walking home from High School. There were three pit bulls out roaming, and their pack instinct kicked in when they saw me. They started circling me, and the alpha decided to go for my leg. He ended up with my foot snapping into his face. They decided they didn't want to eat me that bad.
Another time, I was just walking down a sidewalk, and somebody else had left their pit unchained. He charged me from behind, which caught me by surprise. I stopped dead in my tracks, which he didn't suspect and ran into me. He expected me to freak or fly, and I didn't do either... it flipped him out.
Never had any run ins with midgets.
Another time, I was just walking down a sidewalk, and somebody else had left their pit unchained. He charged me from behind, which caught me by surprise. I stopped dead in my tracks, which he didn't suspect and ran into me. He expected me to freak or fly, and I didn't do either... it flipped him out.
Never had any run ins with midgets.
HBlack
Underage Member
I would imagine they would attack in a similar manner.
Midgets are apparently also afraid of fire.
karapetkov
Well-known member
I'd fight Gandhi.