SHORT: What Could Have Made This Story Flow Better???

[YoungStacksLGi]

I recently posted my first ever music video about a young rapper who borrows money from some very bad people in order to kick start his career. Things get messy when his album drops but fails to do enough in revenue to pay back the gangster. This is my first ever video so im looking for positive feedback and suggestions. What could have been done differently and what could have been done better.

Video Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cO3cn-TMG8

 

[j1clark@ucsd.edu]

I recently posted my first ever music video about a young rapper who borrows money from some very bad people in order to kick start his career. Things get messy when his album drops but fails to do enough in revenue to pay back the gangster. This is my first ever video so im looking for positive feedback and suggestions. What could have been done differently and what could have been done better.

Video Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cO3cn-TMG8

The wide shot segments where the performer is on a large flat space in front of a building, seemed to me to be quite a bit 'long'... read as boring...

The other issue that 'jumped' out at me... was lighting... Dark skin needs different lighting than 'fair' skin. This is especially noticeable in the 'where's my money' segment. The flat light + B&W end up with no detail in the black men's faces, especially Mr. Big... I also don't particularlly care for the camera angle. If you were trying for the guy in the chair POV, it didn't quite work.

I'd suggest for that shot, side lighting for the Mr. Big, accentuating the 'shine' on his face to give character, dark (low front light) would be ok, gives a more 'sinister' look. But I'd have his motions look like he's getting into the face of the victim, then cut to a big 'in your face' shot of Mr. Big.

This is a white dude, but it illustrates the effectiveness of the side lighting to make something look sinister.