The Fight Within

Jay Rodriguez

Jay Rodriguez

Coffee Member
Hey everyone,
Checkout my film "The Fight Within" and let me know what you think of it.

The film took me forever to finish as the script changed faces about 12 times while being filmed. Overall I'm not happy with the final product but I got some pretty good feedback from others.

All shot on the DVX100a with a 35mm adapter.
Edited in FCP.

Official Site


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Very, very nice Coffee. Acting was great, characters fit their parts well (although a little cliche, IMO), audio was supurb, and the score was great.

I would have liked to have seen a bit more camera movement, though. Seemed like during a lot of the conversation scenes, the camera was unmanned on a tripod? The "bedroom" scene in particular - - she move's around a bit, but the camera just stays perfectly still.

Also wanted to see a bit more of the fighting! those guys were really going at it, eh?

The "film flash" wasn't doing it for me. Or at least the first one, where it fade's back into the "mechanic" scene. Didn't really seem to fit the rest of the mood of the peice. Maybe that's just me, though.

How'd you score it? what shotgun was used? where did you find your actors? How many on the crew?

AND... I got the feeling of a "to be continued" at the end. Is this the start of something?

Overall, you should be very proud. I see you said you're "not too happy with it", but you should be, and you should also look at it as a learning experience (as I'm sure you don't need to hear that from me).

peace

-brown
 
Coffee

I liked it this time around.

I wanted to ask you what you thought of my PM.

Also, I said the same thing that rcbrown just said.

"I didn't like the first film flash into the mechanic scene."

Anyways, good luck with the short.
 
that was awesome...too strong?
okay that was great.
seriously that was nicely done. video and audio especially. how did you do the sound? there was one scene where the camera moves in and was a bit jittery, but i nitpick not because overall it flowed well. and though the jittery movement caught my eye...the story itself and shot composition, acting, sound completely covered it.

so big thumbs up from me...well not really i'm hitchhiking :grin:

no seriously...good job.

oops...question...what was you lighting set up?
 
Hey guys, thanks for posting your thoughts/feelings.

There's so much in this film that I wish I could change from shots to angels to light set ups to mic locations but I don't plan on going back and reshooting any of it.

The audio was shot by using an audio technica mic, not sure of the model though. We had it plugged right into the DVX, no mixer involved. I worked really hard in FCP cleaning the audio and dealing with level differences.

The lighting was all sorts. We used simple home depot lights, Arri kits, Breitek 1000 watt soft boxes and a few other things that I can't really remember right now.

The script was pretty good from the beginning but quickly fell apart because it was rewriten so many times during production. I wish it ended a little better but there's alot of people, filmmakers and writers who really loved the ending. Some have complained about it ending too abrupt and some have felt cheated out of a "feel good" ending because they wanted to see who wins but the film isn't about the fight in the ring, it's about "the fight within" the man. We all love something, have a passion for something but there's so many things that pull us away from that passion, from that love. When things get extreme as in this character's case where his wife gives up on him, his father/trainer doesn't really believe in him, his boss thinks he's a worthless idiot and his mother is ill he comes to another fork in his road. That fork is him laying on the mat once again. Hurt, empty, beat up is when most of us find out who we reall are, what were really made of and that is when he shows what and who he really is. He gets up. He says those magical closing words, "now I'm ready!"

I don't know, maybe I'm nuts but I think the film will speak for itself on the festival run. Maybe it'ss do good or maybe it'll tank. Hell maybe it won't even get accepted but one things for sure, I learned so much making this film! It was all worth it for me.

Jay
 
I thought It was fantastic. great performances all the way around. the boxer had skill and acting ability. the film has a lot of heart, and thats what makes a boxing film great... bravo.
 
This was very nicely done. One of the more professional efforts offered on this board. Good job.

I think there are some things that can be cleaned up. I agree with rcbrown that the bedroom scene is a little static. But I think it can be helped by picking up the pacing some. I know there are moments that need pauses. But there are also some moments where the pauses slow the pace of the film. Go through it again and I think you'll see what I'm talking about.

this brings me to my next question. What was the original story and what got rewritten? Why did it get rewritten? Budget? People didn't think the original was good enough? The reason I ask is because I too wanted to see him kick the hell out of that dude. I understand what you're saying about it being the fight within but I don't think him coming out and beating the guy to a pulp takes away from that fight. I think if anything, it vindicates him for overcoming that battle. Sometimes us filmmakers can get a little too wrapped up in doing things differently solely for the purpose of doing things differently. We stand proudly by our anti-climactic ending because it bucks the system and is "original". But in the end, the only people you really impress with those kinds of endings are other filmmakers who are impressed that you had the balls to go that route. In the end, I think it's about the audience. And the audience would've loved a finish like that. It's not like you created some sugar-cane candy-corn lovey-dovey glossed-over disney film and then had a happy ending that everyone knew was coming. Your dark subject matter makes an ending like that actually work very nicely. Cause you kind of don't expect it. Don't know if you still have this footage. If you do, you should at least consider it. Because when he finally gets up and we have that great shot of him coming forward at the end, that was the moment I was the most excited for in the film, and felt let down when it ended.

Oh, and the actor who was his boss was great! My favorite character.

Good luck.
 
thanks fellas....

The original script was scoped to end the way that it did. The rewritten stuff was the mechanic job scene, the mom scene and the wife scene. LOL, now that I think about it 90% of the film was rewitten. The first day of shooting was the boxing material, the working out material and the locker room scene with cooney. Then there were issues between me and the writer about bringing more background into the film on the lead character. I fought for that as there simply wasn't anything there that made me like him or feel for him. From that point on, the whole process was in shambles and I had to piece a film together as it was being shot. Live and learn.
 
Hi Jay !

I found some technical flaws in this and the ending left me scratching

but overall I'm wondering when we'll see your next projecct

you obviously are a filmmaker and I cannot wait for your next story
 
I have a list of things as well. lol

As for my next project, well, where do I start? lol

I have a script in hand for the drama fest.
I have a script in hand for a quick 3 minute comedy.
I have a music video that I've agreed to do.

Not sure what I'm actually going to do because I'm itching to shoot something larger. Feature length is where I want to throw myself now.
 
This might be a dumb question but... why did you wait til you were filming before deciding the script wasn't ready?

Then again, I guess every studio film is being written why it's filmed these days so you're ahead of the curve.
 
nice job.

nice job.

fwiw: you had some nice set-ups. the mirror reflection of your protagonist as his wife spouts was beautiful. opening shot on the canvas was sweet too.

was very short. felt & screened like a long trailer as i did not feel it had an ending.

nice score too btw.

you are an encouragement/ thx for the view!
 
Great to see you finally got it up! Well i've given my feedback already in the review i Pm'ed ya. Hope it was useful
 
jay, just finally watched it. really great job bro. it has really come together from all the little parts you were working on over the past couple of months. It really came out great. It was defintely a good learning expereince (for all of us, and you) and I think every thing you do is now going to get progressively better and better. can't wait to see how your films progress over the next few years. keep up the good work
 
good job man. i especially liked the training/boxing scenes, the cinematography on those scenes was really good. my only criticism is that the bedroom scene seemed to drag on a bit, but this is far better than anything i could put together right now. keep at it.
 
Hey Jay,

Alright so my stream of conscious comments...

- Early on here it looks really pretty (during the voiceover at the intro)

- I like the camera move from Ray coming in the front door to his wife in the kitchen

- I don't know if this would be my opinion in all cases, but for "the Fight Within" i thought the 35 adapter worked well for you in closeups, but not in wide shots. I didn't like the look of them at the dinner table in particular, it distracted me more than once.

- I didn't like the girlfriend/wife performance

- I liked the fight footage, just didn't like the flashbulbs, seemed like too small a fight for that added effect

- I thought the scene of Ray and his mom was nice, felt like it was part of a bigger movie. I wanted to see more of them together

- I feel over-strobed in the last parts of the film

- Dig the music over the end credits

- I also like this kind of ending, I don't think you need to say anymore.

Overall, I can see your confidence growing as a filmmaker and this is another step forward. Very nice. I love that you're choosing ambitious stuff and not a "two guys in the woods chatting" movie. Keep it up, can't wait for your next!
 
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