.static Dramafest Entry

I need to see this ASAP. psssst. can you sneak me a copy. they will never know.

btw, your in va, we're in pa. we should work together on a future project sometime. just a thought.
 
My impressions of STATIC:

great beginning, great ending. middle kind of sagged for me. I would have lopped out the entire middle and continued the story out in the “field”. felt like your ending was the beginning of this story. sequel?

nonetheless... great work, imaginative idea, well done!!!
 
Very cool idea! I liked the ending a lot once he was in that field (cool colors/cinematography). As Zak said, the beginning and end were the stronger parts, the middle was a little slow for me. I think it could be shorter and would be more effective if the middle was tightened up some. Other than that, I enjoyed it, kudos on the sound design as well.
 
Wow, thanks guys. This is awesome, already getting some responses. The 2nd act was problematic for me as well. I wish I could've had another editor work on that part, but oh well. Can't wait to see all of yours. I'm in the middle of a move right now, but plan on a major viewing tomorrow when I get back to my laptop.

All the best.
 
Raw and Vital said:
I need to see this ASAP. psssst. can you sneak me a copy. they will never know.

btw, your in va, we're in pa. we should work together on a future project sometime. just a thought.
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Definately man. Keep me posted. I'll do the same.
 
REVIEW: .STATIC

Interesting kind of drama. Supernatural even. What didn't we see enough of, though?

I'm all content on this one. I know a lot of people are going to think "Hey, this is drama fest, not sci-fi or horror." But, I think I get where you were pushing the visuals. Guy's torn asunder by his relationship situation, drinking his life away and here's his "wake-up" call. What's gone on is that it's probably just too long and too "contained" to really care about Eric being killed.

I think there wasn't any time to spend with him before he starts going crazy. Is Eric a good guy that got dumped and just can't get over it? Or is he an angry drunk that beat's females, who might deserve such a fate? To this effect, not spending enough time discovering who this fella is warrants no feelings for him.

It ends up being "eric goes into the TV, and that noise is soooo loud!"

Another problem I had was the phone dialogue. It lasted too long. I've worked the phones before with angry customers, and I can tell you right now that when a customer is disgruntled like that, all phone operators are allowed to say "Well, if I can no longer assist you or put you on the phone with a manager, you have a nice night sir. Sorry that we can not help you." ... click. It went on way too long to be believable.

The rest seemed to droll on, filling up six minutes with a lot of details we didn't need to know, outside of the phone conversation on the floor.

I'd like to ask why you chose a sci-fi element as your pay-off in exchange for developing on the relatable aspect of your story. The relationship problem? I think that if you could've melded the two together evenly, it would've sat better.

But, that's just me! And what do I know!?!?!?!

Thanks for exhibiting, Ben! Can I have that TV?
 
Haha, thanks Kholi. You'd have to ask my actor for it. We shot this in his place.

I've really been enjoying your reviews. I know the phone conversation is too long, just watched my film again. I really need an editor. Oh well. We did 3 long improv takes, one WS, one MCU, and one CU. That's what I had to cut with, and there was soo much good stuff that I had for options in the edit. That was the tough part. Anyway, I'm not going to explain too much as far as my thinking went in the making of .static yet. I'm waiting for more reviews to digest. But you make some really good points.

Very constructive in your critiques Kholi, keep it up.
 
.static . . . my favorite film so far! I LOVED your motion graphics! GREAT After Effects work (or whatever you used)! You somehow got the type treatments JUST RIGHT. I didn't know what to expect (a good thing). Loved the screen in the air gag near the end. Also, I really liked the telephone dialogue--it sounded REAL! TERRIFIC job!
 
the bad:
lighting a little too flat
tv scene was too long for my taste
the drinking and smoking was too obvious
the camera cut at 04:20
the death scene effects

the good:
film kept my attention all the way through
telephone scene was good, believeable scripting
the post death scenes were interestig and well done

hope i dont sound too harsh. i think you did a good job
and love to see your progression in future projects
 
Rezfactor said:
.static . . . my favorite film so far! I LOVED your motion graphics! GREAT After Effects work (or whatever you used)! You somehow got the type treatments JUST RIGHT. I didn't know what to expect (a good thing). Loved the screen in the air gag near the end. Also, I really liked the telephone dialogue--it sounded REAL! TERRIFIC job!
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Thank you Rezfactor. I'm really flattered. I've read some of your posts on the site and have respect, so this means a lot coming from you.

I used After Effects for all the Motion Graphics and Effects.

I'm planning on waiting longer to read more reviews, interpetations of the story, etc. before I elucidate more on my own opinion of what happened in the short as well as some of the production obstacles, etc. that led to those decisions. So stay tuned to this thread if you're interested in hearing a little more later on.
 
I enjoyed this, was interesting, telephone convo was kewl. Then the sitting on the kitchen floor, wondering who to call.
Who do you call when you know yer gonna die? not only that, what does one say? I could go on, this film makes for alot of discussion. Yep, really liked it.
Thank you.
 
Great effort! I know how much work these things are.

I thought it would have fit much better in the Horror Fest! lol.

It was ok
 
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Wild Imagination Films said:
Was this drama or sci fi fest?
Sorry guys, it didn't do anything for me. Looked like it was shot in your apartment with something other than a DVX.
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It was shot in the actors apartment with a DVX-100B, some 65 watt bulbs, and some duct tape.

Sorry you didn't like it. I don't understand why some people think this is a Science Fiction film...way off if that's what you think.
 
Hey Man, I just wanted to say I enjoyed this one. It was very entertaining. It was kinda of like a episode of the Twilight Zone and I'm not complaining that it had some "sci-fi" hints to it, so did Solaris and that is pure drama (at least in my opinion). I really loved the phone conversation it was very witty. I admit the lighting could use work but it looked good with what you had. So was the TV world his heaven?
 
Thanks a lot Jeremy. I'll discuss my thoughts on the short later on after more reviews since I don't want to influence opinions too much.


As far as the lighting, I know its not great. I don't have anything to work with really as far as lights go, nor too much experience with lighting. I was sort of hoping the flat, kind of "blah" look would work for the story though. I try to work around the limitations and make them advantages, but I understand that a lot of people here love lighting elements, so I'm sorry to disappoint.

I was definately going for a Twilight Zone-esque type feel.

Still haven't gotten to At the Park yet but I can't wait to see it.
 
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