SHORT: SHORT: Tick Tock

And if your mind can't fathom the lesson go see the commentery. lol

Gregg Juke said:
Yeah, great effort, but I didn't get it. I don't have any experimental film cred, and I don't claim to be an intellectual giant, but-- "WHA...?"

Bergman = Yes

Understandable Plot or Point = No

And it was pretty long for the relatively undeveloped concept.

GJ
Click to expand...
 
Something which also is very important and could bring it to a higher level is the sound...and the sound design. No, not the music.. (I think the music is even to much at some points) but the sound, the ambiances, the atmosphere, the drones, the rumbles, the wind, some creaking, squaking stuff, metal hits sounds.... His footsteps have to sound very loud, which then have to be Foleyed (a capital F !!! whoohoo),

Then make it a 5min piece, follow some advice for framing, let the actor BE the character.

And don't be afraid to tell an actor or acress "sorry you're not good enough for THIS role".. even if they're not payed... Just don't be happy because it's a friend or they want to do it for free.
 
Don't wanna give too much specific advice on your short since Im just starting out and have my own technical hurdles, but I think it's incredibly awesome that you have heroes and a direction and a chosen style. I think youre noticing that its not so easy to make a good art film as you may have guessed (the cinematography and framing in Persona is genius). You might wanna track down "Art Cinema As Mode of Film Practice" by David Bordwell, "Theory Of Film" by Kracauer, "What is Cinema?" by Andre Bazin, and "Film As Art" by Arnheim, if only to strengthen your understanding of your chosen cinematic tribe. So yeah, basically, as far as Tarkovsky, Antonioni, and Bergman? Not ready to add you to that list just yet.

But I dig what you're doing.

also I dont think every well composed shot needs a really deep meaning, but here's two characters, becoming each other, overlapping in the frame.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/13/Bergman_persona2.jpg
 
astrozombie said:
Don't wanna give too much specific advice on your short since Im just starting out and have my own technical hurdles, but I think it's incredibly awesome that you have heroes and a direction and a chosen style. I think youre noticing that its not so easy to make a good art film as you may have guessed (the cinematography and framing in Persona is genius). You might wanna track down "Art Cinema As Mode of Film Practice" by David Bordwell, "Theory Of Film" by Kracauer, "What is Cinema?" by Andre Bazin, and "Film As Art" by Arnheim, if only to strengthen your understanding of your chosen cinematic tribe. So yeah, basically, as far as Tarkovsky, Antonioni, and Bergman? Not ready to add you to that list just yet.

But I dig what you're doing.

also I dont think every well composed shot needs a really deep meaning, but here's two characters, becoming each other, overlapping in the frame.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/13/Bergman_persona2.jpg
Click to expand...


I agree with that. I have a ways to go in some parts but I always relate back to the filmmakers mentioned. It is clear to me that my style is closest to Tarkovsky. I am still in the developing stages of my expreshon. But you must see the similaretys. Thank you very much for all the useful info. I will go see if i can get ahold of these books. And I'm glad you've noticed I have a syle. As we all know not everyone has this. I see myself probably finishing a long film in the near future.
 
Wow this thread was an entertaining read... anyway...

It's a short film that shows promise.

It reminded me of this film:


and Christopher Nolan's early short Doodlebug:

 
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