Scene from a feature I am working on

khmuse

khmuse

Tech Guru
Hello all,

This is my first post to this user group, but I have been an avid reader since discovering it earlier this year. There have been a number of excellent threads, so I felt like I needed to become a little more active. Following is a link to a scene from a feature that we started shooting back in August. Just about all the principal photography is finished. There are a few pickup shots to do, but some of the talent has been tied up on other projects. It was shot with a DVX100A at 24PA and a Panasonic anamorphic adapter. This scene is picture locked, but hasn't been through sound design as of yet. This scene won't require ADR, but there are a number of other sound elements not present yet. The intention is to print the first 20 minutes of the film to 35mm for an investors screening just after the beginning of the year.

Any comments would be welcome.

http://www.museelectronics.com/scene_19.wmv

I'll try to upload a QuickTime version at some point in time as well, but need to get a copy of QuickTime first.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

Try some split edits for better pacing.

Images look good though.

chris
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

I agree with Chris it needs some split edits. That'll take away from what I call ping pong editing. Your turn to talk my turn to talk so on and so on. That will smooth out the edits. Also adjust the cut when the girl in red comes over to the other girl.

Over everything else looked nice.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

Hello Chris & Gary,

Thanks for the feedback. I'll try some split edits and see if I can improve the scene.

Thanks again for the suggestion!
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

I have a question. The scene where it shows the girl in red telling the other girl to "point": Is it violating the 180 rule to have the girl in red appear on the left side of the screen rather than staying on the right? Not trying to critique at all, just wondering if that is what the 180 rule is. Thanks, tim.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

Shots looks good. As the others suggested editing need further fine tuning.
Personally I dont preffer split screen. I have seen in most cases it really stand out as a forced technique disturbing the movie flow.
I would have opened the scene with the CU of the book,CU of the girl01 dialogue,shot of girl02 reaction and revealed the entire room later in the middle of the conversation. And towordas the end go for the CUs again.

I wish there was POV shots after the girl make the choice.
Girl01 putting the finger in wid shot continue till she forcing 2nd to tell what it is.Cut this shot when the 2nd girl look down.

Show the CU of 2nd girl looking down and till fooling first by saying Dancing.

Instant Reaction of 1st girl.

Quickly back to the reaction of second girl.

Then she lookes down and see what it is.

Her POV book.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

PC

I think you confusing Splt Edit with Split Screen.  A Split Edit is when either audio or video precede or follow its corresponding piece of audio or video. (Someone is talking as the video cuts to someone else for example).  Not trying to be a KIA just making sure w all know whats being discussed!  :P

Thats a good eye Slimothy and I think is.   It might be best to show the 2 shot as she walks over, or witht he camera between them, pan with the red as she walks over.  

Even better is if the camera pulled back as she walked over (but then you'd need to shoot from the same side :P

I agree on the Split Edits comments as it would definatley help pacing.

The lighting is very nice and the girls arent half bad.  Your comps are well chosen as well.  

Watch the audio as it seems a bit High (treble)

I noticed a little stereo on the dresser.  Maybe a little song playing in background would help with the ambience?
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

Thanks Mr Hudson for correcting me making me.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

No worries. Too many damn 'terms' in this art form! I'm always getting stuff backwards (push/pull, dolly/truck, wide open, step down).

LOL
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on


Thanks to everyone for the suggestions. I am going to check and see if there is a two shot that would help to reduce the number of cuts. As for the 180 degree rule, yes, we did bend it a little. Unfortunately, this set was built on a sound stage, so we don't really have the option of going back and shooting anything else. As I mentioned earlier, there is much to be added in the sound design stage, the scene will have a number of added ambient details as well as some music. I hope to have a new pass of the scene up on line tomorrow.

I appreciate the comments on the lighting and talent. We were lucky in that we had a good DP and gaffer; the character of "Alice" the one who is trying to decide on her elective choice is also the screen writer (and my youngest daughter). As for the audio being a little thin ("treble") this appears to be more a function of the wmv compressor as the original tracks have better spectral balance.

Thanks again to everyone.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

hell i didnt even know it was a set. I thought this was really good. I had to admit that i had no clue what a split edit was till John explained. But now I get it and I think its a great idea. The girls are actually good actors for people so young. All around it was pretty darn good. good job
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

quicktime is a free download from apple.com
also, why are you going to blow up to 35mm for the screening? It will be held in a theatre? otherwise burn a dvd and wait for the investors to say yes and pay for the blowups
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

i agree with bryant -- save your money, instead press some dvd's with a professional investors packet -- if it gets picked up, then a distributor will pick up the neg cost -- don't do it now, you'd be wasting your money, it won't impress anyone --

best of luck on the film --
cheers
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

woah, that was a set? Nice!

Khmuse- take the guys advice and save your money. If it gets picked up let the studios pay for the blow ups. Nice work. I would like to see more. Thanks
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

Thanks everyone for the comments on the blow up; however, the investors do want to see the project in a screening theater. How it looks is a condition of them funding the remaining costs and reimbursing our expenses so far. There is also an acceleration clause in the talents contracts that gets everyone (cast and crew) paid at the point that the investors agree to complete the project. I have done a number of tests and the blow up makes a big difference in the overall look of the project. Working DVDs are great for family and friends, but in this case, they do want to see the first reel.

Thanks again for everyone's comment. I will post the revised edit of this scene later today.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

looking forward to seeing the new edit. Will it have some ambient sounds?
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

Hello everyone,

Here is the updated edit, but no, it still hasn't gone through sound design. We will be using a scoring studio to do all the sound design work so it won't be until all the scenes in the first 20 minutes are finished.

http://www.museelectronics.com/scene_19b.wmv

Thanks again to everyone for your feedback and let me know what you think of the changes.
 
Re: Scene from a feature I am working on

I definitely think it's better this way. Two things though:

1. If you have any more 2-shots (like the one in the beginning) it might help to sneak one or two of those in. Either that, or just stay on each girl through their line, the next line, then back to their next line once or twice. Even though the split edits help, it still bounces back and forth too much for me.
2. That part just before the girl in red sits down is still a lttle disorienting. If you have no other shot to go with, I'd cut out the "No, like" and go right to the "think about it logically" line. It would flow a little smoother I think.

But overall it looks better. Great job.
 
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