"Sand Castle" clips & grabs...

AoO Media

Member
UPDATE!!

Here is the full version of the short... though it is still rough... and I am open to changes...

I put it on YouTube for now but will upload the .mov file tomorrow.
And as before, input is most welcome! :smile:

(Oh yeah, I changed the title... :smile:) Ring Around

Thanks again to all the comments!

~Evangeline


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Hey all!
Well, first, I'm totally in awe of what some of you guys do here (plus I'm just a highschool student)... so I'm a tad nervous 'bout posting here... but here goes!

This is my first non-documentary project so I'm pretty excited about it. But it is (obviously) still pretty rough... so yeah, I was hoping to post it here and get some help (please!).

The following download has the opening and a few clips... see if you can tell what it is about. (The title is going to be changed, btw.)


Sand Castle


Table.jpg



Car.jpg



Laugh.jpg


Write.jpg

​
Write.jpg
 
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those are some nice looking grabs there man. Love the CC and lighting however the vignetting is a bit much.

download video now.

just watched it. The vignetting is not as noticeable in the footage, but what is there gives it this nice look. Congrats, this was very well shot.

in all honesty, without attempting to be comical, i felt this video reinforced the importance of coming together at the table as a family.


oh, and welcome to the boards!
 
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Lovely grabs Aoo. I really like the first one. Great colours and space.

I'm starting to like the raw DVX image way better than 35mm adapter footage. Just doesn't look as good as HD 35mm adapter stuff, and your footage proves raw DVX looks great!
 
Thanks for the comments (and welcome), guys!

LloydC: Yeah, raw DVX footage rocks!!! Totally love the DVX. Shellin' out the money for my baby was one of the best things ever... (though when I look wistfully (and penniless) at the Mac G5, I might not say that :laugh: Haha.).

General question: does the video seem cheesy... in the least? And do the colors seem to distract?

Comments/critique/bashing :smile: please!

~ Evangeline
 
bididdy said:
i really liked the lighting in these grabs?

how did u light the scene?

or was most done in post?

No special lights or whatnot (i wish i had access to some equipment!)... just ghetto home lights and natural lighting (plus some done in post). And I played w/ the iris a bit... to get the kind of effect I wanted (don't know if that is a "no-no" or not...). For all the scenes w/ the table, the scenes are lighted by a chandelier that hangs over the table... making them (the scenes) have this cool overcast of light and shadows.
 
i personally enjoy natural looking lighting, and that is what you achieved with this. No hollywood, backlight everything and anything. But lighting that is there, but hard to notice.
 
My friend the video is not cheesy. I am not one for abstract-leave-it-to-the-imagination films, but your short raised alot of questions and provoked the right amount of curiosity. Trust me when I say this; your video is years beyond other videos that I have seen on this board. CC'ing was good and so was you framing and shot choice, which is what you should initally worry about when your starting out. It is one of the most important elemets in a good film, because if you mess that up, no amount of editing can fix it. Keep up the good work.
 
Love the shot of the door opening and the light leaking into the frame. Great shot. Good soundtrack too. you do that?
 
manymoosh said:
My friend the video is not cheesy. I am not one for abstract-leave-it-to-the-imagination films, but your short raised alot of questions and provoked the right amount of curiosity. Trust me when I say this; your video is years beyond other videos that I have seen on this board. CC'ing was good and so was you framing and shot choice, which is what you should initally worry about when your starting out. It is one of the most important elemets in a good film, because if you mess that up, no amount of editing can fix it. Keep up the good work.

Thanks for the encouragement! :dankk2:
 
Looks good but on the question of does it look cheesy I have to be honest and say there were a couple of shots I don't like. The first three of the man (His hand on case/Pushing the button/Stepping into Elevator) were not needed. All three but especially the finger pushing the button looked like coporate video shots they tell nothing of the story.

You just need him stepping out of the elevator, the audience can fill the rest in for themselves.

Personally I would also cut the fifth shot of him walking through the door unless it's telling me something important.

These kind of shots are extremely common with amateur editors. Believe me I'm just as guilty of them when I shoot anything and only notice that kind of thing when I edit someone elses video.

There is no elegence in cutting from one location/angle to another but following the same person essentially doing the same boring thing.

If we see a man leave an elevator we can safely assume he called it, got in, pushed a button and travelled up. We can also assume that once he is out he is going to enter a room somewhere and so it will not be jarring when we see him sitting there later.

Sorry, I wouldn't normally go on about this but it all looked very good and I would watch more so it's important to really get teh edit right (just like every element of film making I guess.

Hope that wasn't patronising. I am more of an "amateur" than almost anyone else here when it comes to camera work but I think I know a few things about good editing.
 
marko5000 said:
Looks good but on the question of does it look cheesy I have to be honest and say there were a couple of shots I don't like. The first three of the man (His hand on case/Pushing the button/Stepping into Elevator) were not needed. All three but especially the finger pushing the button looked like coporate video shots they tell nothing of the story.

You just need him stepping out of the elevator, the audience can fill the rest in for themselves.

Personally I would also cut the fifth shot of him walking through the door unless it's telling me something important.

These kind of shots are extremely common with amateur editors. Believe me I'm just as guilty of them when I shoot anything and only notice that kind of thing when I edit someone elses video.

There is no elegence in cutting from one location/angle to another but following the same person essentially doing the same boring thing.

If we see a man leave an elevator we can safely assume he called it, got in, pushed a button and travelled up. We can also assume that once he is out he is going to enter a room somewhere and so it will not be jarring when we see him sitting there later.

Sorry, I wouldn't normally go on about this but it all looked very good and I would watch more so it's important to really get teh edit right (just like every element of film making I guess.

Hope that wasn't patronising. I am more of an "amateur" than almost anyone else here when it comes to camera work but I think I know a few things about good editing.

No, it wasn't patronising. :smile: The reason why I posted the clips was so I could get feedback/critique... so I was glad to read your post.

I agree w/ what you said about those shots for most cases... but the "feel" I wanted to get in the video was the monotnous, boring, predictable routine of life. thus the boring shots.

Does it seem like the wrong approach to getting that feel?
 
I think that trying to get the feel of monotony in your movie without boring the modern audience is a very tricky proposition.

If you want to use these shots then I'd reshuffle them a little.

If you show him call the elevator then cut to woman at desk then show him entering the elevator then cut to someone else (girl on phone?) then back to the man leaving the elevator.

This gives the impression of time passing as he is going through the monotony of getting to work. It makes the exercise take longer (more boring for the character) and at the same time more entertaining for the audience.

Another good use of editing to entertain the audience whilst showing boredom is the fast cutting of repetative tasks (factory workers). I am racking my feeble mind for examples but only know I have seen it put to good effect. Granted this is entirely irrelevent to your thing.

In a comedy - make 'em laugh. In a horror - make 'em scream.In a romance - make 'em cry. In a piece reflecting on the monotony of daily life - give you DVD away for free.
 
I like it. Like the lighting and the color. How did you get everything to have that 'green, rich' look? Was it done in post CC?
 
Updated full version of the short is available on the first page! :smile:


Lake Films: Most of the green look was done in post... though I tried to light it so I wouldn't have to do too much...
 
Nicely done.

I especially like the couch shot, which jump cuts to each family member sitting by themselves, in their own little bubble. I think this "concept sequence" made the whole thing work.

As everyone said, nice shot choice, cc, lighting.

May I ask what your in camera settings were?
 
Just watched the whole thing and I really liked it. Contrary to my earlier thoughts I wasn't bored, I thought you captured the sadness very well.

Personally I'd drop a couple of shots (Finger pushing button/Bowl going into cupboard) which just seemed unnecessary but now I can see what you are going for overall I would no longer intercut the shots of the man with shots of the others.

Very well done. I guess I was just plain wrong with a couple of my comments before.
 
Super Trooper said:
Nicely done.

I especially like the couch shot, which jump cuts to each family member sitting by themselves, in their own little bubble. I think this "concept sequence" made the whole thing work.

As everyone said, nice shot choice, cc, lighting.

May I ask what your in camera settings were?

glad you liked the couch shot. :smile: i liked the sequence... but i wasn't sure if it fit or not. i guess it does. :Drogar-Dum(DBG):

i don't have my camera on me right now, but when i do, i post my settings.
 
marko5000 said:
Just watched the whole thing and I really liked it. Contrary to my earlier thoughts I wasn't bored, I thought you captured the sadness very well.

Personally I'd drop a couple of shots (Finger pushing button/Bowl going into cupboard) which just seemed unnecessary but now I can see what you are going for overall I would no longer intercut the shots of the man with shots of the others.

Very well done. I guess I was just plain wrong with a couple of my comments before.

*whew* Glad you liked it... :thumbup:

Your earlier comments were very helpful, actually... made me evaluate and re-evaluate my ideas for the film. Thanks.
 
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