SHORT: Roulette - new short film

shame u didnt get better sound

some good match cuts and crosscutting

acting coudlve been better but thats no shock at this level

choose/create punch sound fx that sound less cartoonish

love how it turned black and white if i wuz u id grade the opening even more warm/orange maybe even throw in some diffusion effect there-- so you get more of that contrast between the warm happy world and the cold noir world they suddenly fall into!!!

whys this taking place during the day-- night wouldve been so much better oh well

lighting in the second scene was great- very simple, functional, and yet stark- great noir technique there - you coudlve fudged the light in some of the closeups to get more modelling tho

I would cut out some of the jokey stuff in the beggining I know you want to set up the characters but its an online short- ppl get bored and click away very fast get to the meat of the story faster -

if u open the story by crosscutting between the killer in his car and them joking/ playing cards youd get some great suspense

2:03 ugly amaterish videoish composition--- watch out for and frame out wierd unidentifiable shapes in the background that mean nothing and go against the mood of the story--whats that a baby bag thing? no babies in this story--- home videos can have meaningless junk in the background- we cant-- making a (motion) PICTURE means taking everything away that doesnt help the meaning of the picture

truthfully they should not have been in the kichen-- living room or basement or phony game room wouldve been better- u just needed to set up a table-- scenes in kitchens should involve food cooking etc

u told a story with minimalistic resources---totally great noir approach just a few simple props, stark lighting and a simple story--- I'm trying to watch more true crime TV myself to learn how to do this-- crazy stuff happens in real life!!!!

good stuff
 
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