Rough Title sequence for film

Seamus McFlannel

Seamus McFlannel

Well-known member
Here is a rough title sequence for an upcoming project currently titled "The Sins of the Fathers" It is based in my work as a priest, in dealing with the effects of generational sins on families and geographical locations. It is a mystery thriller in a sense, but it is all based in truth and it is theologically accurate.

I don't have actors yet, and I am currently lining up investors. This little opening will be used (along with one scene which I will be shooting soon) as a sample for that purpose.
The music is just a demo I recorded in an hour on Digital Performer, and the titles are just used as examples.

The film is being shot in an around Carroll County Maryland.

http://www.stoneroadpictures.com/movieclips/titlesequence.mov

Seamus

P.S.- I used to shoot a fair amount of film, and I prefer the HVX.
 
nice bro, the music and the footage set a certain tone for the picture... it fits the title of the film well.
 
Nice landscapes, Maryland is a gorgeous part of the country and I think you've captured that beauty well.

You might think about reducing the size of your titles. Think about how the film will look projected on a 30' screen and I think you will agree that what looks right on your computer monitor is probably too large in the context of a film. Take a look at your favorite films on your TV and I think you'll find that the titles are a lot smaller than you would imagine. It's a subtle thing but I think people will respond subconsciously to the fact that you have produced this with the intent of it playing on the big screen. When I see large type, it makes me think that the material was produced for the small screen and can taint my perceptions from that point onward.

I also think smaller type will help emphasize the grandeur of the locations and photography.

Nice work, I can't wait to see more.

-filmstox
 
Its a tad slow and the lack of people actually set no thematic stage for me.

Landscapes and cars :)
 
I felt that the zooms during some of the shots took away from the "feel" of it. Though it looked good technically, it felt a little unprofessional.
 
I like the landscape shots. The car footage was a bit bland. You should work a bit with your titles as well. Make them stand out a bit more.
 
good looking footage, but I agree with Filmstox - the titles are far too big, almost intrusive. Otherwise, very nice footage and comps. Oh, and I like the music - the subtlety of it is relfected in the shots and editing. Good luck!
 
The point about the titles is a good one. As I stated in my first post it is just for sample puposes, and I'm not good with graphics anyway ( i'd probably get someone else to do them), but per your advice, I'll change what I have and make it smaller

As I stated earlier, I have no actors yet, hence no people. When I shoot my sample scene, I'll include them into the trailer. The only footage I had at this point were scenics that I have grabbed in my spare time.

With regards to the pace, it is slow on pupose- I can point to many film openings that are slower, so I guess that this is just personal taste. By the way, the scene following the title sequence will be a rather dramatic exorcism of a house which will be an abrubt change of pace from the opening and will give a foretaste of later plot developments.
Thanks for the feedback.

Seamus+
 
Looks like a fun project Seamus.

Perhaps a little bit of the story woudl help support the mood of this sequence. What is the movie about?

-gl
 
careful for the background sound when cars are driving by - you faded out a bit quick and the quality change from the sweet sounding acoustic guitar with the (what sounded like) the on-board mic from the HVX reminded me a bit of a mediocre documentary.

the country shots look great, btw
 
"The film is being shot in an around Carroll County Maryland."

I live 15 min. from Carroll County, can't wait to see the movie.

MLCinema
 
I'm not too fond of the dissolve in the background fooatge as the picture's title dissolves in. Also, it's good to keep your graphics consistant, so, if it were me, I'd lose the drop shadow on the picture's title. Nice footage and pacing, otherwise.
 
That's some beautiful country. Nice footage.

As a graphic designer, I'd put the titles in the various corners, smaller. First one in the bottom right, next one in the upper left, etc... I think that would look nice and not be so intrusive. Also, the choice of typeface can say a lot about the film. As I don't know the story, I can't really comment, but that's something to consider.
 
Nice footage, but a couple suggestions. I totally agree with the titles suggestions. I would go smaller, maybe a different font, and also, I wouldn't center each one. Offset them a bit, in a corner, along the top, etc. As it is, it looks slightly child-ish, which makes it feel a bit more amatuer.

The footage itself looks real nice, but could stand a bit of color correction. I would probably pump the contrast and black levels a bit, you will get a much more filmic look. BTW, what format did you shoot this in?

I also, would maybe add some people to the opening to start to introduce a bit of what the story will be, as opposed to a documentary on the Maryland landscapes.
 
darwinandpaine said:
That's some beautiful country. Nice footage.

As a graphic designer, I'd put the titles in the various corners, smaller. First one in the bottom right, next one in the upper left, etc... I think that would look nice and not be so intrusive. Also, the choice of typeface can say a lot about the film. As I don't know the story, I can't really comment, but that's something to consider.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the comments. I love good graphics, but I've never been really done them. I like to rely on someone like you. This edit is simply for demo purposes for raising funding for the film ( I'll also be adding a sample scene to the demo), and I'll be using someone to do the titles for the final edit. But I am taking your comments to heart (as well as others' in this forum) and improving the little I have right now. So, I appreciate the comments.

The film itselfis a supernatural mystery, not unlike something M. Night Shamylan would do, but it is based on my actual experiences as a priest. While the story is fiction, the supernatural phenomenon are acurate.

While there will be some special effects, the film is not driven by them.The story is driven by the plot and the characters.

So the best examples that I can give would be M. Night or even Hitchcock. Mystery and suspence without gore.

Thanks again for the comments. BTW, the footage was shot in 720pn.

Seamus
 
I also, would maybe add some people to the opening to start to introduce a bit of what the story will be, as opposed to a documentary on the Maryland landscapes.[/QUOTE]

I am going to add people, once I decide on my actors and shoot a few scenes to add to the demo.

Seamus
 
Hi Seamus...nice shots.

As a teaser trailer to try and interest investors, if what you are selling them is land in a country area, then it's great. If you are trying to use the trailer to invoke the kind of style - tone - mood of the hypothetical finished film "a supernatural mystery, not unlike something M. Night Shamylan would do", then it doesn't work at all.

And not meaning to be disrespectful to some of the previous posters in regard to the size of the titles, and whether or not you have people roaming around in the dissolving shots (because these are possibly valid points), but these things are not going to make your trailer any more interesting. More professional? Yes. More of an indication to me as an investor as to what this film is about? No.

The music (like the scenery) evokes a sense of peace, that in itself is neither a good thing or a bad, but if you are trying to set the mood of a thriller, then you had better juxtapose something else in the shots to create the necessary forboding tension. If you want to keep the scenery, then you had better re-think the music. But even that is all band-aid stuff, it still doesn't fix the problem that it doesn't seem to be about anything.

This is your story, "it is based on my actual experiences as a priest. While the story is fiction, the supernatural phenomenon are acurate" and you are the film maker, so let us in.

If I may use the intro to the movie Field Of Dreams starring Kevin Costner as an example (and the tiles in that film are huge white over a black plate), the opening scenes are a bunch of photo's dissolving continuously, without the narration, they would be meaningless. As the opening sequence comes to an end he says...

"I'm 36 years old."
"I love my family."
"I love baseball."
"And I'm about to become a farmer."
"But until I heard THE VOICE... I'd never done a crazy thing in my whole life."

And on that last word, the music and the tone take on a completely ominous feeling.

It's fantastic, and totally compelling, and that's what you have to show to your investors if you want to get their juices (and chequebooks) flowing.

Movies are about stories, not scenery. Find a way of telling us what your story is about (and by the way it sounds like a great idea from your posts, not the clip) and your off and running.

Thanks.
 
^
What he said. Much of it reminds me of a commercial you'd see from the local tourist board. Some shots of the scenery look really nice, others look kind of flat. The bottom line is however than even the best scenery shots don't give us any sense of what the movie is to be. If you want to line up investors or just stop your audience from walking out in the first two minutes, you're going to need to give us a real sense of things to come and that's probably going to mean sticking some human beings in this thing (even if they're just temorary untill you decide on real actors).
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top