One Minute short!

for me the voice over is killing it a bit, as is the music, its all a bit mtv reality tv show for my tastes.

having said that i think there is some nice little bits in there, i like the close up shot of fingers with paint on, i like the idea of graff artist come writer, could have some fun with this. i would have used a series of nice close ups to tell your story, you could have some nice juxtapositions between clean type on white paper, and sticky paint covered fingers/ fingerprints. stenciling on a keyboard or something.
 
The mtv reality feel is a good point, the guidelines for this video pretty much set you up to tell the story that way, (had to use their music selection, could only be a minute) called for some quick cheesy narration. I tried to juxtapose the late night, dirty graffiti artist with the up early, healthy eating motivated writer(last shot is of his hands free of paint and very clean), threw a lot of white light in the last scene to communicate that. I appreciate you feedback very much, the advice of others is essential to anyones creative growth. Cheers!
 
I like it, good idea, good execution. The quality of the footage wasnt really super awesome, but you had good angles for the most part.

I think the voiceover works just fine for this project, i mean there really isnt any other way around it and the voice you picked is pleasing.

Im not sure what the video has to do with the notebook? But other than that, i liked it.

jon
 
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