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Nick Harris

Active member
Hi gang,

My company just produced a pair of spec spots for the Mr. Goodbar candy bar, on which I was the DP and Co-Director.

I'd love to get some feedback on what's working/not working for you. There are two spots, and two cuts of each so take your pick or watch them all :D

Extended Cuts...
Schoolyard- http://www.vimeo.com/9794193
Patio Goons- http://www.vimeo.com/9794286

Broadcast cuts...
Schoolyard- http://www.vimeo.com/9794417
Patio Goons- http://www.vimeo.com/9793931

We shot on the Panasonic HPX500, w/Fujinon HAc15x7.3 Cine Zoom


-Nick Harris
Sunspot Pictures
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Haha. These are GREAT! Cool concept and superbly executed.

The broadcast ones I think are a bit better just because they're more to the point. But that shouldn't come as a surprise. They give a succinct delivery of the goods, product shot, boom. Perfect.

I particularly like the zoom-in on Mr. Goodbar when the basketball rolls towards him. It's just a minor detail, but it lends the spot a cool 70s-funk style at the end. One thing that stuck out the first time I watched it was the reverse shot of the bully wanting the ball. The framing just seemed out of place. But after a few viewings, it doesn't bother me much. It's probably not a big deal.

The other spot is solid as well. Again, just very well executed. The only thing that didn't work for me was the female talent's reaction to Mr. Goodbar. She seemed like she was still laughing it up with the photographers, not really interested. I think it's because she broke the gaze with him, and looked down. It's small, and maybe I'm being overly analytical, but this really stuck out to me.

I hope this helps. Overall, I think these are very professional and re-watchable -- perfect for TV broadcast. If you hadn't said they were done for spec, I wouldn't have known the difference. Nice work, Nick.
 
I like the playground spot better myself. Seems more of a heroic situation than the other. So, what if they are photographers...managing a bowling alley is respectable. Not getting picked is a greater injustice for Mr. Goodbar to remedy.

The only thing in the broadcast cut of the schoolyard. The kid is wearing shades? in the wide? a little jarring.

I really think it's a great spot otherwise. The look on Mr. Goodbar's face when he kicks the ball is classic.

I dig the schoolyard one.

-Martin
 
Wow, thanks guys this is just what I was looking for!

Tom, yeah we were playing with moving the line in both of these. The idea being that mr goodbar's entrance changes the situation, turns things around, so we wanted to turn the line around using him as a new reference point to change up our blocking. The problem with the schoolyard bully coming up is that we lost the kids after a certain time, and ended up missing a shot that comfortably turns us around. Unfortunately we had already shot the bully approaching.

Haha, Martay you're the only person on the forums to notice this yet (or at least point it out). Yeah, the unfortunate situation was, we shot the kid in the morning with his glasses on, then after the first shot or two, they had turned into sunglasses (he had those damned transition lenses!), which is no something we should all be aware of from now on. I'd never run into it before...

By the time we realized they'd turned into sunglasses, we couldn't go back and re-shoot the shots with the sunglasses. Fortunately, my AC had very similar looking glasses on, with no transition lenses, so we gave the poor kid some glasses with the wrong prescription for the remainder of the shoot (don't worry he's fine). In post, we weren't going to use the wide shot with goodbar walking up, but it was just so necessary in establishing this character head to toe. For the most part, it goes unnoticed because the sunglasses never return, so good eye ;)

I also like the schoolyard spot better, it's just simpler, more concise. I think the idea with the bowling alley job comparison is that it's superficially just less "cool", not saying it isn't a respectable job, but it's definitely not as outwardly exciting as adventuring around the Amazon and the African plains taking photos of dangerous wildlife... although, this exact comment was a concern when we wrote that.
 
Hmm, not sure that I liked either of these.

They're well shot for sure, and the acting isn't bad. But the concept isn't clear enough, in my opinion. The jokes aren't fleshed out. I couldn't really pinpoint a punchline.

Him kicking the ball is funny, but it kind of comes out of nowhere and then the commercial just ends. And I don't quite get how Mr. Goodbar turned the situation around in the second one. It looked to me like that guy's wife was more interested in those goons. Then when she saw Mr. Goodbar she looked like she wanted to bang him.

Unless the tagline is, "Mr. Goodbar: He'll bang your wife." it doesn't really work. At least not for me. Maybe when the guy takes a bite of the Mr. Goodbar, he gets the courage to say something sarcastic/scathing about the goons's job, thus embarrassing them and impressing his wife. Then the "Who are your friends?" and "Don't even know em." lines would make more sense, cuz he just burned them and now has more confidence. Right now it seems like the joke is, "So what if I manage a bowling alley? I have a large, black friend. That's right!" I think it would work better if the appearance of Mr. Goodbar gave the guy the ability to come out of the situation on top.

Sorry to be so frank, but the setup and punchline was hard to pinpoint. Maybe I'm just not very funny...
 
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