Need Opinions Please!

[brianluce]

O we will see , the first draft wont be good at least I did something

Don't undersell yourself. It might be really good.

 

[cl0n3b4by]

18 my first draft and my first shot at a screenplay if its good well xD w00t but it probably will be mediocre but thank you

 

[ConspiracyPenguin]

As a writer myself, I can say you have talent. That first scene really captivated me and made me think. I love the description, but I do see that it may be a little wordy. Have you ever thought of writing a book? Just a thought. But, reading what you have so far really put the picture in my mind. Keep up the good work!

 

[cl0n3b4by]

Thank you it means a lot, I changed it now. I cut out some words and things here. Actually if anyone is interested. I can send the first 15 pages I would love some feedback.

 

[ConspiracyPenguin]

Feel free to send them to me, I would love to read what you have. I'd be happy to give you feedback as well.

 

[cl0n3b4by]

http://pc.celtx.com/project/ZTtKMli0zRGn/view/http://celtx.com/res/1kEqvojZWTHA

hopefully this link works xD

 

[cl0n3b4by]

no one?xD