SHORT: My New short Film -"Revive"

the idea of the sound of "grafity paint" is good...But I would use another sound...more "clean" without cars in the back etc...

The ambiances are good (you don't hear the cuts). But around 02:23 the ambiance suddenly goes down... It's because the music I assume ? Well I think it was a little to abrupt..

02:47 the sound goes up to abrupt. And I would re-enter the ambiance sounds at 02:45 when he hits the bag, just on the hitting.
and then just continue...I also hear someone talking who suddenly stops talking.

A more "storytelling" isue I have: I as a viewer sees it's a gun... so the music doesn't surprise me....
What I would do is: Delete the part between 02:53 and 03:02, then if you have the medium shot where he takes the gun out of the bag, just when he takes it out, show it in medium, start
the music and then go to the close-up where we see it better.

The story itself I find a little....Less...actualy....
 
Bro, Thanks a lot for watch my movie. I appreciate ur advice on sound ! I am new in filmmaking and still now in learning process.
 
I enjoyed this some nicely setup shots, some good use of lighting to create a somber sort of a mood.

I have to agree with one of the comments above, the writing was a little here and there, i felt the story was a bit disjointed, i kinda got what you were going for, but a few more things to explain would have helped.

The technical aspects though were good, so i would love to see what you can come up with with a bit more time working on the script.

Keep it up.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top