Lingothree - Dear Jane

Just watched it, great job! The makeup was superb, idea was original, cinematography rocked. The only thing I didn't care for was the acting of the older lady. I'm sure it's been answered but was that a real girl in the final shot?

Great job.

Tim.
 
Good work Lingothree. Mostly liked your take on the genre. Kind of had the feel of the "Priceless" credit card commercials. Not sure I'm completely comfortable with the humorous treatment juxtaposed with such realistically depicted mutilation of the victims though. But the humorous aspect of the screenplay was handled deftly.

While many shots were obviously handheld to appropriate effect, some others seemed unintentionally shakey on some pans and tilts. I thought the flat, overbroad acting worked in the context of the humor. Loved the spanking scene as a pov shot from the spanker. The strung-up victim in the closing shot was unconvincing and kind of spoiled the ending for me.

I thought this was a pretty bold and inventive experiment. Congrats on the good work.
 
Slimothy said:
Just watched it, great job! The makeup was superb, idea was original, cinematography rocked. The only thing I didn't care for was the acting of the older lady. I'm sure it's been answered but was that a real girl in the final shot?

Great job.

Tim.

Thanks for the feedback. And yes, that was a real girl. If you look back a few pages in my thread, you can see the makeup in progress.


steve2bees said:
Good work Lingothree. Mostly liked your take on the genre. Kind of had the feel of the "Priceless" credit card commercials. Not sure I'm completely comfortable with the humorous treatment juxtaposed with such realistically depicted mutilation of the victims though. But the humorous aspect of the screenplay was handled deftly.

While many shots were obviously handheld to appropriate effect, some others seemed unintentionally shakey on some pans and tilts. I thought the flat, overbroad acting worked in the context of the humor. Loved the spanking scene as a pov shot from the spanker. The strung-up victim in the closing shot was unconvincing and kind of spoiled the ending for me.

I thought this was a pretty bold and inventive experiment. Congrats on the good work.

Thanks for the feedback. What about the final shot was unconvincing for you?
 
Oh, sorry, should have explained. I just meant she didn't look like she was really strung up, rather like she was kneeling on the bed with some ropes attached. The expression on her face seems to indicated she's already had it, but her position and the lack of tension on the ropes doesn't look like she's dead weight. You can also see her kind of move a little.
 
steve2bees said:
Oh, sorry, should have explained. I just meant she didn't look like she was really strung up, rather like she was kneeling on the bed with some ropes attached. The expression on her face seems to indicated she's already had it, but her position and the lack of tension on the ropes doesn't look like she's dead weight. You can also see her kind of move a little.

Got it - thanks.
 
Sure. I also wanted to add that I had considered entering the fest and had developed a story idea that involved some pretty brutal and disturbing action. Ultimately, when it was really to late to develop another idea, I chickened out fearing that I wouldn't be able to execute the film with a level of depth and quality that would justify and redeem the depiction of the extreme degradation of another human being as something other than prurient.

I think there are redeeming reasons in your piece to use some pretty degrading depictions, and it took some guts to try to pull this off.
 
steve2bees said:
Sure. I also wanted to add that I had considered entering the fest and had developed a story idea that involved some pretty brutal and disturbing action. Ultimately, when it was really to late to develop another idea, I chickened out fearing that I wouldn't be able to execute the film with a level of depth and quality that would justify and redeem the depiction of the extreme degradation of another human being as something other than prurient.

I think there are redeeming reasons in your piece to use some pretty degrading depictions, and it took some guts to try to pull this off.

I'm glad you brought that up. I'm totally glad I did it, and in fact in retrospect wish I had even gone farther. But at times I felt pretty awful in creating this story and character. In researching serial killers, it was rough at times to think that this stuff is real. And that really awful stuff happens to real people. And that my movie doesn't even touch on how awful it can be. And when one of my dead prostitute actors had to back out last minute because she works at a rape crisis line and needed to cover someone's shift - now that was a great irony.
 
Oy Lingo. Good show. I liked the camerawork and cinematography on this. The V.O. was good too. Sometimes a bit too deadpan, but maybe it works better that way. The acting was over the top and funny. Good makeup job on the dames.
Also; a boob. A dead boob, but a boob. Bonus points. :)

The score fit.

Good dialogue and good script.

This reminds me of the ZombieFest southern belle short. Did you guys do that too?
Take care.
 
mentatDUKE said:
Oy Lingo. Good show. I liked the camerawork and cinematography on this. The V.O. was good too. Sometimes a bit too deadpan, but maybe it works better that way. The acting was over the top and funny. Good makeup job on the dames.
Also; a boob. A dead boob, but a boob. Bonus points. :)

The score fit.

Good dialogue and good script.

This reminds me of the ZombieFest southern belle short. Did you guys do that too?
Take care.

Thanks. Dead boobs = better than no boobs.

No we did not do the southern belle short. That was before my time with dvxuser.
 
Just finally getting the time to copy the notes I compiled in a Word doc while watching the shorts:

Okay, I’m disturbed. The acting was one of the stronger points in this film, even though the mother was over the top, I believe she was supposed to be … great job. However, for me there was no twist because for some reason, the moment I saw him writing, saying she’d grown cold & he’d always have her heart, I literally pictured it in a jar & knew she was dead … so for that reason alone there was little ride for me, as I was just waiting for the finish I knew would eventually be coming … though I did NOT expect her to be tied up as a marionette, lol! Nice VFX work on the makeup, and overall interesting film.
 
CINEMATOGRAPHY:

Well I think this had a good combination of shots and lighting. The opening dolly shots were great. Very smooth, had a good feel to them. I don't think static shots would have worked as well. And also the lighting in the opening where it kinda goes from being on, to being off subject. I thought that was nicely done.

EDITING:

Everything was cut together very nicely here. Really the only comment I have is that I did not like how you cut to a black screen for 2 or 3 seconds here and there. I think you should've kept with cutting to more visual things, different objects and such.

SOUND:

This was one of the few films that I was able to leave my speakers set to one level throughout the film and didn't have to worry about having something sound to loud or be too soft to hear. So great job on mixing everything and keeping your levels consistent.

SCORE:

Such a good soundtrack for the film. It went perfectly and really helped to keep the film moving. At the ending, it just matched so well. Great work.

SCREENPLAY:

I liked your idea. It was different, and actually quite funny. I liked how you went back and showed that he had a mother that was really religious and strict, which would go to explain himself.

ACTING:

I think all of the acting in this was great. The way the man kept his voice, his pace during the VO was awesome, it really helped sell the story. Also the mother's performance, even though a little more then I think needed to be there, was great, and ultimately worked best for the film.

Overall, this was one of my favorites because it was original, it had good camera work and lighting, but more importantly the ending made me not only disturbed but laugh at the same time.
 
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