Graeme Noble
Active member
I posted the teaser for the film last week. I now give you the full film on YouTube. Constructive criticism/comments are much appreciated. Thank You!
SHORT: Life of a Spy - Short Film
- Thread starter Graeme Noble
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Those awkward shots from the teaser turned out to be the point of view of her own camera! 
Nothing wrong with the editing and cinematography either, but the whole montage -slash- monologue thing didn't work for me. I couldn't relate to the character at all, making her speeches and all of the slowmo music thingies a complete waste. Could have used some more introduction before the drama montage. Other than that it's interesting and well made
Nothing wrong with the editing and cinematography either, but the whole montage -slash- monologue thing didn't work for me. I couldn't relate to the character at all, making her speeches and all of the slowmo music thingies a complete waste. Could have used some more introduction before the drama montage. Other than that it's interesting and well made Graeme Noble
Active member
Thanks for the comment, I appreciate you viewing it!
I enjoyed it but there were somethings that didn't really click for me. I really hope I don't offend with these points of constructive critique:-
1) In some parts, whether it be the lighting, colour correction and type of shot, it felt like I was watching a soap (like Coronation Street or Emmerdale) rather than a spy short, such as the scenes in the bedroom, kitchen or hospital. It's like the colours were too clean and warm. I sometimes find in colour correction that a nice tint of colour (like a washed blue or green colour) can give that look of European espionage (similar to Ronin or the Bourne films). Just might be something to play around with.
2) I got distracted by what I thought was an overuse of fades when cutting from one scene to another (a mistake that I make quite frequently myself).
3) The actress was very good but I would think that someone like a spy who is a trained killer would have a more hardened exterior to their personality. I mean that I would think that her killer instincts would kick in immediately, even when she realises danger is right there with her in her personal life. And when she cries before she shaves her head. I would have thought that a trained killer would just deal with the illness of cancer and take it in her stride, without it affecting her emotionally.
4) The music was great but in some parts, it didn't really suit the style of film.
Again, this is all just my humble opinion and I hope you don't take offence to it. I did really enjoy the short and there were some really lovely shots in there. I think that you did a very good job overall.
1) In some parts, whether it be the lighting, colour correction and type of shot, it felt like I was watching a soap (like Coronation Street or Emmerdale) rather than a spy short, such as the scenes in the bedroom, kitchen or hospital. It's like the colours were too clean and warm. I sometimes find in colour correction that a nice tint of colour (like a washed blue or green colour) can give that look of European espionage (similar to Ronin or the Bourne films). Just might be something to play around with.
2) I got distracted by what I thought was an overuse of fades when cutting from one scene to another (a mistake that I make quite frequently myself).
3) The actress was very good but I would think that someone like a spy who is a trained killer would have a more hardened exterior to their personality. I mean that I would think that her killer instincts would kick in immediately, even when she realises danger is right there with her in her personal life. And when she cries before she shaves her head. I would have thought that a trained killer would just deal with the illness of cancer and take it in her stride, without it affecting her emotionally.
4) The music was great but in some parts, it didn't really suit the style of film.
Again, this is all just my humble opinion and I hope you don't take offence to it. I did really enjoy the short and there were some really lovely shots in there. I think that you did a very good job overall.
She takes quite a few pictures 
Maybe it was better to first let her take a few pictures before revealing it ?
I see wind, but I don't hear...Did you delete the recorded sound because it was trash because there was to much wind in the mic ? Or did you
plan loooooooooooooong time before the shoot that you weren't going to put ambience sounds (wind, traffic, city sounds, sirene, dogs barking, cats...)
The frame suddenly is a bit smaller, and then get's suddenly bigger...
this type of music you need fast shots, lot's of close-ups cut very fast. Like around 00:50, we're waiting very nicely untill the others pass the spy... It's to slow
Something like close fases, close feets, faster cutting would have fit more the music
How come you use a lot of music ? If you plan to make a 12min film, but it's much better done in 6min...well...make it 6.
The part with the dialogues are good. But watch for "fading in sound", like at 03:44 we see already something, but the sound fades in.. Sound can be "hard cuts" to
with 1frame fade to not have "pops and clicks"
Some of the shot's are to long I think
It did me think about that movie with Vin Diesel as a "secret agent" with that lady who was member of som "Al Quaida-would be people". And she was married with another
secret agent...
Maybe it was better to first let her take a few pictures before revealing it ?
I see wind, but I don't hear...Did you delete the recorded sound because it was trash because there was to much wind in the mic ? Or did you
plan loooooooooooooong time before the shoot that you weren't going to put ambience sounds (wind, traffic, city sounds, sirene, dogs barking, cats...)
The frame suddenly is a bit smaller, and then get's suddenly bigger...
this type of music you need fast shots, lot's of close-ups cut very fast. Like around 00:50, we're waiting very nicely untill the others pass the spy... It's to slow
Something like close fases, close feets, faster cutting would have fit more the music
How come you use a lot of music ? If you plan to make a 12min film, but it's much better done in 6min...well...make it 6.
The part with the dialogues are good. But watch for "fading in sound", like at 03:44 we see already something, but the sound fades in.. Sound can be "hard cuts" to
with 1frame fade to not have "pops and clicks"
Some of the shot's are to long I think
It did me think about that movie with Vin Diesel as a "secret agent" with that lady who was member of som "Al Quaida-would be people". And she was married with another
secret agent...
From teaser to short film...
I don't know how detailed of a critique you want. Here's a quick take - there's way too much story for the way it's written. And there is too much "telling us" instead of "showing us". However, I do commend you for giving the actress a great motivation. We need more films that embrace her character's motivation.
Cinematography, directing - The pic was well lit, and destabilizing the image for her emotional reaction after the fight was interesting.
Acting ? Maybe if the script was revised it wouldn't have put such huge challenges for the actors out there. Even Soderbergh made changes and revisions to "Haywire" to fit the actress and changing circumstances of that films production. You might want to see it. It was pretty good. Your actress also surprised me with her accent. For some reason I thought she was Californian (that's a compliment; they're beautiful)
Overall, thanks for showing this, Graeme.
cheers, mate
I don't know how detailed of a critique you want. Here's a quick take - there's way too much story for the way it's written. And there is too much "telling us" instead of "showing us". However, I do commend you for giving the actress a great motivation. We need more films that embrace her character's motivation.
Cinematography, directing - The pic was well lit, and destabilizing the image for her emotional reaction after the fight was interesting.
Acting ? Maybe if the script was revised it wouldn't have put such huge challenges for the actors out there. Even Soderbergh made changes and revisions to "Haywire" to fit the actress and changing circumstances of that films production. You might want to see it. It was pretty good. Your actress also surprised me with her accent. For some reason I thought she was Californian
(that's a compliment; they're beautiful) Overall, thanks for showing this, Graeme.
cheers, mate
Graeme Noble
Active member
Thanks for the comments everyone!