How long would YOU last in a Slasher movie?

I would probably see the end credits. The characters make mistakes that are obvious to every 8yo watching the film. That's how primitive writing skill approaches suspense. They really go out of their way in order to die.
 
ugafan said:
i would be this guy. i'll likely die after venturing off by myself because i forgot to get the french onion dip for the ruffles. :cheesy:
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And in usual slasher-flick style, your death will of course somehow involve onion dip, and ruffles...
 
Let's talk ideal weapons: I nominate the 10-gauge semi-automatic gas operated shotgun. Even against indestructible murder machines like Jason a la Friday the Thirteenth Part For the Gods' Sakes Not Again, shot will deliver enough kinetic energy to knock them down or back, facilitating your withdrawal. Well-placed slugs even have a chance of severing extremities or limbs. If you get cornered in a structure built of anything less than reinforced concrete you can blast yourself an escape opening.
 
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Sad Max said:
And in usual slasher-flick style, your death will of course somehow involve onion dip, and ruffles...
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when my friends find my body, the snarky one says something like, "looks like someone double dipped."


Cassius said:
I find the average slasher movie to be rather annoying and disappointing. The conflict comes from the characters being completely incompetent and stupid, to the extent that only the bottom rung of the audience can relate to them
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exactly why by the end of these movies i almost always find myself rooting for the killer. :evil:
 
Otis Grapsas said:
I would probably see the end credits. The characters make mistakes that are obvious to every 8yo watching the film. That's how primitive writing skill approaches suspense. They really go out of their way in order to die.
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I have to agree here. Sometimes the killers are really smart and set traps and such, those I worry about, but others you can avoid by general wit and managing not to trip in the wood or drop your keys. I might drop my keys, I'm known for that one, but there's a large number of things that can be done, the number one thing, "stay together". No one ever does. The reason for leaving is usually poorly motivated. Also a well placed stomp to the side of the knee will stop most people as it breaks the knee. So if there's anytime to use that on someone, it's when they're chasing you with a chainsaw. I don't know what to do about Jason. Freddy is supernatural and could be prayed away or cast out and Michael Myers can simply be killed, and Jamie Lee took care of him in H2O. The others are mainly human and can be taken care of or escaped. Also I do have two live swords. If it comes down to whose knife is bigger, then the problem is his. Then again if you happen to be fighting Scarecrow, it's anyone's game. Then again if you've seen "Scarecrow" you've probably already hurt yourself.

-Nate
 
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This is beginning to remind me of the debate in Stand by Me regarding who would win a stand-up fight between Mighty Mouse and Superman.
 
Being that I am well armed I'm sure I'd make it to the credits.

It'd be the shortest slasher film ever.

"Oh no, what is that?"

BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM
 
You know, it could be a lot of fun to put together a slasher movie...

...in which the prospective victims do everything right and the slasher winds up being hunted and fleeing for his life.
 
Man, I wish my girl would allow me to have massive amounts of guns in the house. But we have lots of edged weapons in every room, and it's not like we live in the suburbs or something where you can just walk into someone's house. It would take considerable effort for someone to get to our front door (and no window is accessible from the street), and even if they did, breaking in would be another feat entirely and could in no way go unnoticed or happen in a fast enough time that the police wouldn't be here in about 2 minutes.

Because we live in the most affluent neighborhood in Chicago, literally one night there were some kids walking down the street at about 2 in the morning and their only crime was being a little loud. Not 30 seconds after I heard their voices did four squad cars show up and usher them into their cars.

Of course, if you live on the Southside...good luck! lol

Just last week this guy shot a husband and father of two because his small dog pissed on the guy's lawn. Crazy.
 
Chamber005 said:
Of course, if you live on the Southside...good luck! lol
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Of course if you live on 35th, the police station is right there. That's where we shot one of the last scenes to "Wages of Sin". So you're relatively safe. They generally cleaned up the Bronzeville area. That used to be a horror movie in itself. You could call it "Rise of the Zombie Hypes." Have drug dealers dealing drugs that turn people into zombies. Not a slasher film really, but not too far from reality.

-Nate
 
Chamber005 said:
Man, I wish my girl would allow me to have massive amounts of guns in the house.
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It's difficult to employ more than one at a time effectively, anyway.

Chamber005 said:
But we have lots of edged weapons in every room,
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I wonder how the preference breaks down, when it comes to edged-versus-blunt instruments for close quarters fighting.

For my part I prefer a good heavy set of 24"-30" hardwood escrima. You have a goodly number of both offensive and defensive options, they're extremely unlikely to break and even in relatively confined spaces you can develop a lot of force on the striking end. Slashing injuries are fine and well but a blow to the cranium, clavicle, trachea, solar plexus, knees, kidneys or *ahem* points further south will be more immediately disabling.

Only kind of knife I feel really comfortable with is a punch dagger. I'm not a particularly well-trained knife fighter, so 'boxing-with-the-knife' is pretty much what works, for me.
 
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Seriously...I'd be that one little black kid that survived in one of those Friday the 13th movies. I forgot his name (I think he was on "Different Strokes" or one of those shows). But all I remember was him running like hell...lol.
 
Sad Max said:
Only kind of knife I feel really comfortable with is a punch dagger. I'm not a particularly well-trained knife fighter, so 'boxing-with-the-knife' is pretty much what works, for me.
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I could use both but prefer a knife/sword (gun honestly) in the slasher situation. The beauty of the blunt object is that a "found object" can become one.

Ian-T said:
Seriously...I'd be that one little black kid that survived in one of those Friday the 13th movies. I forgot his name (I think he was on "Different Strokes" or one of those shows). But all I remember was him running like hell...lol.
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Yea, that's what I'm thinking. Run like Hell!

-Nate
 
Anything that requires you to get within your opponent's direct reach sucks... that's why they have bayonets at the tip of rifles.

So you don't like guns? Keep a short aluminum bat under your bed... and be sure you have enough sense (practice) to swing into the open part of the room, not hitting the wall or ceiling before BONKING the intruder in the side of the head.

If you're truly worried about personal safety and we're just talking wacky ideas here then bolt a short knife to the end of that aluminum bat... then choose a technique: 1) charge and jab... 2) swing and slice... or 3) jab, jerk back, then swing at your now stunned intruder.

The important thing to remember is if you're going to go for it... then go for it. It's all head-shots and "swing away Merrill..."

I still say a gun is the logical "serious" choice... but the bat-sword has a lot of later story potential.
 
I'd be...the slasher? Duh?

No seriously though, I'd be the one that reminds everyone that there's one guy and there's like 5 of us and so stick together, back to back, and when he comes everyone jump him. I'm sorry but I bet 5 unarmed college students could take down one guy no problem unless he was like..Shaq....OMG I AM SO WRITING THAT SCRIPT....Shaq Attack?
 
MattinSTL said:
If you're truly worried about personal safety and we're just talking wacky ideas here then bolt a short knife to the end of that aluminum bat... then choose a technique: 1) charge and jab... 2) swing and slice... or 3) jab, jerk back, then swing at your now stunned intruder.
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At this point you basically have a mace. Hit your local antique store for the genuine article.
 
The chain is the weak link(s) in the weapon. We're talking close-quarters here.

With a mace the chain is a variable... it has a "choice"... with the bat-sword you never surrender control.

I don't like investing in "chance".
 
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