SHORT: First film feedback please

D

Disease8

Active member
This film was shot in one day and the sound and editing done in a week or so. It is more a experiment of framing and suspense. I would really appreciate any feedback.

 
Going from "no sound" to "suddenly sound in the same shot" is "artistique" ?

It's good you don't reveal the person yet and the close shots are nice.

I think in the edit, it could be a little more "compact"... by removing 1 or 2 frames in some shots.

0:56, here he's suddenly revealed...

For the rest it's, nice shots, nice edit... just little more on the sound.

Sound is not only music, it's music together with ambience sounds, footsteps, sound of the knife hitting, sound of....everything.

The thing that a film is like: "whoooooooooooooooooow duuuuuuude, that's dam cool !!!!!" is not the music, it's the combination of music mixed
with sounds of fighting, footsteps, suddenly no music... Silence... Silence can be your biggest friend

The end stops suddenly (the music)... small fade out can do a lot.

And where he takes the knife the 2nd time (not in the dream but that other time) I wanted to hear a "knife taking sliding metal sound"... now it's...just a stupid knife like I have 408644684668 in my kitchen
 
dre83 said:
Going from "no sound" to "suddenly sound in the same shot" is "artistique" ?

It's good you don't reveal the person yet and the close shots are nice.

I think in the edit, it could be a little more "compact"... by removing 1 or 2 frames in some shots.

0:56, here he's suddenly revealed...

For the rest it's, nice shots, nice edit... just little more on the sound.

Sound is not only music, it's music together with ambience sounds, footsteps, sound of the knife hitting, sound of....everything.

The thing that a film is like: "whoooooooooooooooooow duuuuuuude, that's dam cool !!!!!" is not the music, it's the combination of music mixed
with sounds of fighting, footsteps, suddenly no music... Silence... Silence can be your biggest friend

The end stops suddenly (the music)... small fade out can do a lot.

And where he takes the knife the 2nd time (not in the dream but that other time) I wanted to hear a "knife taking sliding metal sound"... now it's...just a stupid knife like I have 408644684668 in my kitchen
Click to expand...


THanks! :-)
Yeah I should have put more time into the sound but as a basic means of getting it finished and moving on to something better I focused on a build up with the electronic music.
Yesh I guess I was trying to be artistic with some of the edits and sounds.
Not sure where you mean about the "Going from "no sound" to "suddenly sound in the same shot" is "artistique" ?" ???
At the beginning?

Many thanks for the feedback, very good criticism ! :-)
Good to hear from another sound guy! :-)
 
LOT of focus issues, and the fact it isn't lit is pretty obvious, very flat looking. It did keep engaged enough to watch the whole thing, so a plus there.
 
Thanks!
The focus "issues" are on purpose, its all the rave these days! ;-0
No seriously I like the focus pulling.. What do you mean?
You are right about the lighting! :-) Thank you for the feedback!
 
Disease8 said:
This film was shot in one day and the sound and editing done in a week or so. It is more a experiment of framing and suspense. I would really appreciate any feedback.
Click to expand...

As others have commented, lighting is generally poor. For me, the handheldfollowaround style is a quick method to 1) get me motion sick, 2) get me to stop watching.

If you intention was to emulate Dziga Vertov, or the onetake "Russian Ark"(2002), I'd suggest a 'real(tm)' steady cam setup.
 
j1clark@ucsd.edu said:
As others have commented, lighting is generally poor. For me, the handheldfollowaround style is a quick method to 1) get me motion sick, 2) get me to stop watching.

If you intention was to emulate Dziga Vertov, or the onetake "Russian Ark"(2002), I'd suggest a 'real(tm)' steady cam setup.
Click to expand...


Thank you for the feedback!
I think I like the rough camera work and the feeling that the shots are a mistake, like the camera man is not paying attention, its accidental that those shots were picked up. It give it a more involved feel to me like you are seeing something that really happened. It also adds to the tension that is supposed to build up.
I appreciate your feedback and will consider everyone's advice on the next proper scripted film I make.. :-D
 
dre83 said:
In the first 10 seconds there's no sound, but then suddenly there's sound
Click to expand...

Again I left this like that on purpose. Don't know why just thought it was artistic. If I spent more time on it I might put some strange sounds in there. Remember this is a short test with no planning, no retakes, no script just a quick laugh really. The fact that people are criticising it like its a real film is great! :-)

Again its important to get feedback for my scripted film so thank you guys :-) ... :thumbsup:
 
j1clark@ucsd.edu said:
Here's an example of Dziga Vertov, "A Man With a Movie Camera"(1929)

Click to expand...

This is pretty interesting but perhaps quite far away from my intention. I like Blair Whitch/cloverfield type realism. I want to play with this to some degree but not making the camera view a character like those films, still retaining the invisible man floating eye camera style that is dominant in film.

What Steady cam would you suggest? Is that a brand?
 
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