Entrance - The Whole Movie - Please Critique

dillont

dillont

Well-known member
Howdy folks,

I've finally posted my last film to the web - it can be viewed at:

http://www.dillonthomasdigital.com/entrance.htm

The file size is 21 megs, and will begin streaming immediately for anyone on broadband. Its a short 11 minute film.

I'm looking for feedback/critique on sound design, and any minor modifications to be done to the edits. The film will be making the film festival circuit this summer/fall/winter.

The story is based on a true personal experience.

Thank y'all for your time.

Best regards,

Dillon Thomas
San Francisco
 
The story is intriguing and fantastic. A very well done piece that makes a good point, and takes us into a world that we've not really been in before. Excellent work! The shots with shallow DOF are exquisite!

My only suggestion would be to tighten the edits where he is getting his hearing aids put in. This scene seems to drag a bit, and it doesn't really need to because once we understand that he is deaf, it doesn't need to take him quite so long to put the hearing aids in. Other than that suggestion, I thought it was nearly perfect in every way! Well done!
 
I agree.... damn good film, great writting, and filming... like constantine said, tighten it up, and it will be perfect...
 
Constantine and Mikey,

Thank you for the feedback! *EXACTLY* the kind of feedback I'm looking for!! Please keep it coming.

I've already taken a look at your suggestion and implemented it into an edit, and you're right ...

Thank you!

Best regards,

Dillon Thomas
 
Hey this is Franklyn of CYPHER Productions. My girlfriend is a sign language Interpreter so I am around a lot of deaf people. I loved your peice it wasn't sappy but it did make me think "what if I was deaf....oh that would suck." but then you turned it around on the hearing. It was great to hear how silly we sound and how many wasted words we use. My only suggestions are cut the hearing aid part faster and place subtitles so that deaf people can watch it. When you do I will forward the link along.
 
I do have a subtitled version of the piece but have been thinking that the idea of the piece wouldn't be fully understood by the Deaf (I'm hard of hearing). Perhaps I am wrong and should have a subtitled version online anyways.

Thank you for the compliments!

Dillon Thomas

EYES OF NY said:
Hey this is Franklyn of CYPHER Productions. My girlfriend is a sign language Interpreter so I am around a lot of deaf people. I loved your peice it wasn't sappy but it did make me think "what if I was deaf....oh that would suck." but then you turned it around on the hearing. It was great to hear how silly we sound and how many wasted words we use. My only suggestions are cut the hearing aid part faster and place subtitles so that deaf people can watch it. When you do I will forward the link along.
Click to expand...
 
Good work Dillon. I really enjoyed this piece. The sound works really well and you casted this guy very well also.
 
Dillon,

A great example of how story is king! Excellent story, good pacing and beautiful compositions. Loved him coming out of the doctor's office with the parade going by.

Couple of questions if you have the time!

Did you get to shoot that scene in the Flood Building? The outside is impressive, but the interior with it's marble on marble hallways is something to behold. My lit. agent was in there on the seventh floor.

What app did you use to roto the backgrounds out of focus?

Same question for the gradual introduction of color as he walks around Powell and Market at the end - what app and technique did you use for that subtle effect?

Did you use Bart's tinted window as your ND - it did a pretty good job for the most part.

Cheers and thanks for sharing a great piece from the City!

e
 
Hey, great work.
I thought the film was very meaningful, and looked wonderful. The acting was also very natural from your main actor to your extras. The folley is what made this movie though. You paid great detail to environment sounds, and that really came through. Granted this is a movie about hearing things, but it really adds a lot to the movie.
I like the steady cam shot up the escalator, and I liked you masking of the background. HOwever, when you masked him standing in fron of the building, I don't think that worked as well. When he starts to walk it seems like he is moving through pudding, and everything is swirling around him.

Good job.
 
Dillon, very well done. Cast was excellent. I remember when I got my first hearing aid. (hearing loss due to explosions and gunfire from stuntwork) I drove everyone nuts, just like I did when I would turn up the tv.
 
Thank you for the compliments! It was hellishly hard to write, and I went through 25 drafts of the script before we came to shoot.

The only stuff that was shot in the Flood building was the shot of him standing in the hallway, and the shot of him walking out and standing in front. Everything else was shot inside the director's office at my work. The Flood building is gorgeous.

I used After Effects to rotoscope Jet (the main character) out from the bg and blurred the bg for the false DOF.

The piece was edited entirely using the VT2 from NewTek - its a PC card, and the step child of the original Video Toaster. I won't be editing my next film on this, though (moving to Avid or FCP). The gradual color introduction was a filter placed in the timeline to affect all clips after he emerges from the building.

The train shots were on the N Judah Muni line - no ND filters used.

I'm going to assemble a website on the making of, and show the making of (yes there's a making of) as well as how certain tricks were achieved. There's quite a lot of rotoscoping in the piece.

Thanks again for the compliments!

Dillon Thomas

overlandfilms said:
Dillon,

A great example of how story is king! Excellent story, good pacing and beautiful compositions. Loved him coming out of the doctor's office with the parade going by.

Couple of questions if you have the time!

Did you get to shoot that scene in the Flood Building? The outside is impressive, but the interior with it's marble on marble hallways is something to behold. My lit. agent was in there on the seventh floor.

What app did you use to roto the backgrounds out of focus?

Same question for the gradual introduction of color as he walks around Powell and Market at the end - what app and technique did you use for that subtle effect?

Did you use Bart's tinted window as your ND - it did a pretty good job for the most part.

Cheers and thanks for sharing a great piece from the City!

e
Click to expand...
 
Thank you for your feedback, Scharky! One of my biggest concerns is in the audio, considering that I am hard of hearing. I designed the audio track, and spent many many days listening careful for the perfect sounds to put in. I had a sound engineer listen to it too, he said it was great, but then he's a friend of mine and well you know how that goes...

Thanks again!

Dillon Thomas

scharky said:
Hey, great work.
I thought the film was very meaningful, and looked wonderful. The acting was also very natural from your main actor to your extras. The folley is what made this movie though. You paid great detail to environment sounds, and that really came through. Granted this is a movie about hearing things, but it really adds a lot to the movie.
I like the steady cam shot up the escalator, and I liked you masking of the background. HOwever, when you masked him standing in fron of the building, I don't think that worked as well. When he starts to walk it seems like he is moving through pudding, and everything is swirling around him.

Good job.
Click to expand...
 
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