DRUNK STORIES!!! Share!

Well, I dont really drink because im allergic to alcohol but I used to go on these camping trips with about 50 people to party. The rule was dont bring your girlfriend, wife, husband, boyfriend etc. Soooo Im sitting there at the picnic table with this girl Dawn that was always the hottest girl there and she says to me " lets see who can drink the most tequila shot for shot". I look at her and say I cant drink that stuff, it will fck me up on the first shot. Then she says " me too, you know i cant drink at all. It will be fun" as she licks my hand and pours salt on it. See right then and there I would have said you drink all the damn time and it never gets you lit that bad but when she licked my hand I went into stupid mode. I said......
"duhhhhhh ok" and we proceded to do shot for shot.

I remember looking at the bottle and seeing it half done and thinking, wow, I can hang!
Then I must have blacked out right after because the next thing I know is everyone is following me over to the bushes and all i see is flash lights in my face. Then the next thing I remember is i was on my knees puking with the lights in my face and everyone chanting GO! GO! GO! GO! as my guts came up and I black out again.
Then I wake up brushing my teeth for a sec and black out again. THEN.....
I wake up inside my custom mini van with my head between the legs of Dawn on the back seat. I hear something and I turn over to look and see this guy standing outside the sliding door( i guess we never closed it) watching us. He says, "hi, im sorry I was just walking by and the door was open..." then I look back at her and think, wow I cant believe shes in here with me. THEN I ****ING BLACK OUT AGAIN FOR THE NIGHT!!!! I DONT REMEMBER ANYTHING ELSE!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Shes gone but theres a **** load of tissues on the floor that are all sticky and **** so I know something happened but i cant rememeber anything.
Thats my first and last time I was ever drunk enough to have a story....
 
Damn Oppressor (what's up man!!!)...that's crazy...I've never been THAT blacked out drunk...

You know those tissues were that guy's right? He so R. Kelley'ed you...heh

and you know...Dawn was really Don...heh

JK man! haha :) Crazy story...
 
pretty funny y ou spoke about fridays..... just got back from there ( abut $80 bar bil) right across the street from my job. my girl is in the shower now.... checking out dvx us er and...... good times.....
 
Sorry gotta add one more...

One time I was so drunk my friend let me stay on his couch. Another friend of mine passed out on the patio. Everyone else went home. My friend goes to bed.
10 minutes go by. I fall asleep.
BAM Awake...gotta puke...head spinning...can't find bathroom...it's coming up...run to the kitchen...puke in sink...look down...sink full of dishes soaking in water...I start pulling glasses out and start putting them to the side of the sink...puke again...pull the stopper and let the water and puke out of the sink...pass out on couch...
A week later I remembered and told him...he says...
"THOSE WEREN'T CLEAN???"
 
Party Pooper Alert: Never been drunk because I never drink alcohol. Not because of religion (not religious), not because of allergies (pollen - yes, alcohol - no), and not because I'm a prude who doesn't know how to have fun (Got tons of wild/stupid sober stories that were ALL ME, BABY!!!).

Just never been interested. Haven't seen or heard anything that made me think, "Yea! I want that too." Quite the opposite. Everything I see and hear says avoid it ...or end up on COPS with your shirt off yelling, "I didn't do it! She's lyin'!" The peer pressure never got to me, the advertising was never convincing, and the only escape I need is watching a movie or surfing DVXuser. Life is goooooooood.

Before someone says, "but a glass of wine helps the heart." This thread is about getting drunk and that means abuse. The actual ingredient that gets people drunk is poison and the body physically tries to fight it once it enters the system. The body is saying NOOOOO!!!! DANGER WILL ROBINSON!!! DANGER!!!! If you drink too much of the poison it all comes up (like bad sushi). Actually, I doubt most people drink for health reasons, or the rest of their diet would reflect these beliefs. Besides, a candy bar or a glass of grape juice will also help your heart and contains the same antioxidants as wine. But don't go chugging 6 Snickers, my friend. Moderation is the answer.

Final Thought: Nobody EVER said, 'My life was a complete wreck, ...until I started drinking.' It's more a problem than a solution.

Just feel every thread should have an opposing side for some balance. Continue with the PAAAARTEEE!!!

[steps off soapbox]
 
On the other hand, no one would have ever heard of Dylan Thomas, otherwise. (Assuming he'd even have written)

Dan
 
Plenty of good points PK. I think everyone has a vice. Some people have more than one. I found it pretty interesting watching "Supersize me" that they said eating mcdonalds a lot was akin to binge drinking constantly.

All the people who eat fast food constantly, are doing just as much harm as someone who drinks half a bottle of beam a night. That said, I've been drinking for I guess 5 years, and have 3 really good stories. I don't get trashed hardly ever, thats what makes the stories funny. They're the exception not the rule. I don't condone drinking and driving whatsoever, thats why my fiance always drives if I'm going to a bar, and I drive her to the bar for her friends. Although I haven't been to a bar in at least 4 months.

I am certainly not gonna try to glamorize drinking, and I don't nessecarilly wanna justify it by pointing out all the other stuff thats bad for you. ( i hate when pot smokers do that )

I eat a great healthy diet, I cook 90% of our meals, I excercize and I get 8 hours of sleep a night. I don't drink everyday, and I may get 'drunk' once a month. If I get drunk, I usually don't drink for a few days afterwards, coz I HATE how it feels. I know that all sounds like justifcation, and uh, it is :P How else can you rationalize doin something unhealthy!

"Final Thought: Nobody EVER said, 'My life was a complete wreck, ...until I started drinking.' It's more a problem than a solution. "

You can say that about sooooooooooooooooooooo many things.
 
lucidz said:
You can say that about sooooooooooooooooooooo many things.
Click to expand...
True, but NOT about DVXuser. Because my life REALLY was a complete wreck until I started visiting DVXuser. :) Can we put that quote on the shirts?
 
Alright, I've got a story, and it's not even something I'm ashamed about. This took place about nine years ago in Beijing, CHina.

I had this friend named Alice. She's cute, but that's besides the point. Alice has this ring her grandmother gave her, one of those heirlooms passed on from generation to generation. Alice has a bad habit of showing it to everyone.

I have this other "friend", Nick. Nick and I aren't good friends, but it was the summer and we were friends by the unfortunate circumstance of having no one else to hang out with. Nick is trouble, and whenever I hang out with him it's a constant balance between fun and chaos.

One day Alice isn't wearing her ring. She can't find it anywhere, gone, poof, vanished. Later that week I'm hanging out with Nick and he pulls out the ring and shows it to me. Sometime between the middle of the week and the weekend I decide I'm going to steal back the ring and give it to Alice, without Nick knowing.

I'd drunk a couple times, but nothing serious. That weekend Nick and I each buy a bottle of Myer's rum. I decide that the plan is for the both of us to get drunk, and then I'll egg Nick on to show me the ring.

Plan goes as expected, we're both drinking from our respective bottles. Time passes, a quarter of the bottle's finished. More time passes, half the bottle is finished. We decide to ride our bikes to Nick's house, not a good idea. We're riding our bikes, very very very drunk, I'm trying not to fall, riding through Chinese traffic, which isn't safe because the Chinese don't follow international/US traffic laws.

Miraculously we both get to his house in one piece. We continue drinking the bottle of Myer's Rum, and our bottles are down to about a third left. We decide to play Scrabble, not just any scrabble, but a game where we don't spell real words, but instead spell words and then concoct fake definitions that sound legit.

Example: Roplick, A native marsh dwelling Australian goat. It's diet consists of swamp leaves and cicadas.

If the other person accepts it, you continue. But if the other person calls bullshit, you drink.

It's getting late, bullshit scrabble continues, and the rum is almost finished.

At some point Nick asks if I showed him the ring. I say no and he takes it out. Nick is so drunk that he leaves the ring out.

At this point things get fuzzy and I pass out. I wake up with a raging hangover, am feeling very crabby, but nonetheless leave before Nick wakes up. I ride home with the worst headache.

I get home and pass out. Later that evening, (I slept all day) I wake up without a headache but my whole body's shaking. I get some water and I try and piece together the night. I panic all of a sudden because I forgot the ring, the whole purpose of the night! I don't know what to do, since i don't want to have another night like this.

For some reason I reach into my pocket and the rings there. I don't remember taking it, the memory of my stealing it back was drowned in the rum. I returned the ring to Alice and restored balance to the force.

See kids, drinking isn't so bad. :beer:

I drink occasionally, and sometimes I'll have a little too much. I'm only human.

Anyone else out there with positive binge drinking stories? :)
 
You know, i never thought they were his tissues. I thought they were mine but now that you say that.... EWWWWWWWWWWWW NASTY.

mine was positive... in a way. At least i woke up while she was still there so I know it happened. I would have hated to just hear stories of it.

We never saw each other after that...she left early that morning and we havnt had a camping trip since. Everyone had bad years after and everyone just drifted apart.
 
Isaac's story started in China and had a ring that was an old family heirloom, passed down thru generations... Was anyone else worried Isaac's story was becoming a Pulp Fiction, Christopher Walken, "Watch" Story. Fortunately he found the ring in his pocket and not some where else. That would have been a bad ending. :)
 
"Anyone else out there with positive binge drinking stories?"

The only positive stories I have about drinking involve me sober(ish) and a chick who was drinking :D
 
Am I the only one here who dosent drink! Though I've heard that hot women swarm around you when you hold a budlight.
 
I have been drinking since I was about 16.

I have many a many a many a night of drunkedness. And I mean 'huggin the porcelin gods' kind of drunkedness. I have experienced 'Black Out' symptons, I have been in a vehicle as it rolled 4 times due to drunk driving, I have gotten in fights and seen beer bottles smashed over peoples noggins, I have had Customs detain me, I have *met* 'a handful of fast women' (I just can't think of another way t put that) while being blitzed.........

Hmmmmm.

I can say out of all of my years I have not really done or experienced 'out of control'. Maybe just luck or circumstance? The stuff I have seen/done I would think is fairly rudimetary isn't it?

I am the happy drunk. I am not Jeckyl and Hyde. I'm simply "Dude! This is great!" kind of drunk.

I still drink although as I get older I am realizing NOT EVERY DRINKING EXPERIENCE has to end in being bombed. (What a revelation)

I don't understand people who do not drink (I mean that respectfully); not people who STOPPED DRINKING but people that JUST DONT. Weird. Gotta throw some Pints back every once in awhile. Clear the mind and let-go.
 
"I don't understand people who do not drink (I mean that respectfully); not people who STOPPED DRINKING but people that JUST DONT. Weird. Gotta throw some Pints back every once in awhile. Clear the mind and let-go."

Amen, to all of it. I'm drinkin some jim B right now. I drink 5 out of 7 nights a week. I get drunk maybe once a month. Tonight would be one of those nghts but i had one last week and I still remember how shitty i felt so, no thx tonight :D
 
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