Doritos - Crash the Super Bowl commercial

MLCinema

MLCinema

Well-known member
Hello All,

Our three entries into the Doritos - Crash the Super Bowl contest are up and running. All shot with the EX1 and edited on Final Cut Pro. This may give a little bit away, but people can't seem to see the punch line on the little screen Doritos plays the movies in. Read the book title on "The Little Girl's Room". Comments and critiques would be appreciated. Thank you.


The Little Girl's Room - Version 2

Labor Bowl XLIV

The Little Girl's Room


Missing Link Cinema
www.missinglinkcinema.com
 
Hi MLC

I'm not seeing a punch line in this piece either. I see a book called Niagara Falls, but that's not the punch line is it?. I just don't see it going anywhere. She has to pee. She might be in the wrong line. She eats a chip. She still has to pee. Fade to black. Where is the wow? If there is something written on some other book it is either too small or too fast to register in my mind.

What is the goal of the protagonist? To go pee. What does eating Doritos do to further that goal? Could the taste of Doritos transport her mind to a far away Spanish speaking land with Latin men dancing with her and rubbing her feet so she completely forgets she has to pee?? Could she give up her place in line so she can eat ANOTHER bag of Doritos and be with the Latin men longer - completely forgetting she has to pee.

Last shot, her with orange Dorito dust all over her mouth, and wet pants....And a Giant smile on her face.

If you use that you have to split the prize with me.
 
agree with chadfish completely!

i think the part that would give it meaning in on the books laid out that she is going to buy. cant hardly read it though and it took me three times watching to find it...and that is only because the OP prompted the issue.

very good quality as far as the shooting goes but none of the stories really did it for me to make them memorable and mostly left me "wanting".

i think chadfish had a great idea for an ending...quote "Last shot, her with orange Dorito dust all over her mouth, and wet pants....And a Giant smile on her face".

it might be a little too graphic for the general public but i think that would be very funny.

good luck to you!
david
www.davidprobst.com

p.s. chad, when do you hear back on the Kata Bag competition?
 
Thanks guys. Actually we thought of making the commercials a little more graphic, but we thought Doritos would not like it very much. None the less that is a funny idea!

The book is titled "The Little Girl's Room". It is much better on a big screen, you can at least read it.

Thanks again.
 
MLCinema said:
Thanks guys. Actually we thought of making the commercials a little more graphic, but we thought Doritos would not like it very much. None the less that is a funny idea!

The book is titled "The Little Girl's Room". It is much better on a big screen, you can at least read it.

Thanks again.
Click to expand...

if the text/title on the book was more vivid it would help it to stand out more. also, possibly more of an enlarged cut away to put the book in your face a little more might have helped.

thanks
david
www.davidprobst.com
 
Your videos are pretty well put together. But the Little Girl's Room concept, as far as it relates to Doritos, sucks. No offense...but I don't see this winning even an honorable mention. From one Marylander to another I just have to be dead honest with you on that one.

The Labor Bowl one though has some legs. I even like the desciption tagline. But there's something funky going on with the audio. It sounds like someone took the echo out of the room...like the dialogue is too clean. Did you ADR in a voice over booth or something?

If Labor Bowl looked more like a real hospital delivery room, had beeping machines and stuff like that (better production design/sound design) and the audio didn't sound as funky...I think you have a chance. Seriously consider re-shooting it with a bigger budget.
 
Now that's just mean. :(

Just kidding. Thank you all for the feedback. Most people are saying the same thing. The Little Girl's Room is much better on the big screen, but everyone agrees the Labor Bowl is much better.

Our budget...Doritos and a bunch of thank you's. Well, and time. We found out about the contest 2 weeks before the deadline. We shot and completed them the weekend before they were due on that Monday. It was all we could do with our short notice.

All in all we like them both and it was a good experience in how fast we can get everything together.

:thumbsup:

Thanks everyone,
Missing Link Cinema
 
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