dauntless films presents "the Devil Inside"

[Kholi]

Review | POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT! I watch the movies first time around strictly for enjoyment, second and third for review.

Just caught THE DEVIL INSIDE. Another H-fest entry with a workable, rounded story.

Script - I think that you had a solid concept. Tired, but solid. There was easily a beginning middle and an end to it. I think that you might've carried on too long, because a good portion wasn't needed. A lot of the dialogue was plastic/generic, which took me out of it all. But you did have a round story. Girl gets beat, devil shows up with offer, girl makes good on her deal, devil shows up and makes another person an offer. It's here we know it's an endless cycle when you deal with the Devil so it was round.

Direction - I think that you had some decent shots going on in the devil scenes. Otherwise, a bit of framing practice is in order. Sometimes the camera looked more surveillance than not.

Acting - Quite bad on all accounts aside from your sleazy Devil. He was pretty much okay as a cheesey representation of the devil. Can't do much on a budget but hey. Your actors do know how to stand still well, though.

Cine/Lighting - I'm surprised at the even lighting going on here. It actually stood out as the second best part in comparison to your script. Nothing was too extremely dark. I didn't dig the flashback scenes too much but otherwise, not bad.

Editing - I'm only good at commenting on what I see wrong with this subject. I think the entire thing could be sliced down and reworked for time, but that's just me.

Sound - Sound needs tweak. The score was punchy at the right times. Couldn't hear a lot of what was being said in the kitchen. Could benefit from sound work.

Special Effects/Art Direction/Wardrobe - Not sure if I really noticed much special effects aside from the bleeding mouth and the horns. Really simple.

Scariest Moments - Waiting for that dude to crack the chic with the baseball bat. I was waiting for it, dude.

Overall consensus - Not a bad entry. I don't think you'd reshoot, so I would recommend recutting for length. Cool deal, dude. Thanks for exhibiting.

 

[Michael_Petro]

Just watched your flick...

I loved the story.. and thought the devildude worked really well...
The scenes in the kitchen were hard to hear..
and no head cracking man were was the head cracking ok there was this one --> good expectation reversal..

 

[Jaime V]

Just caught THE DEVIL INSIDE. Another H-fest entry with a workable, rounded story.

Script - I think that you had a solid concept. Tired, but solid. There was easily a beginning middle and an end to it. I think that you might've carried on too long, because a good portion wasn't needed. A lot of the dialogue was plastic/generic, which took me out of it all. But you did have a round story. Girl gets beat, devil shows up with offer, girl makes good on her deal, devil shows up and makes another person an offer. It's here we know it's an endless cycle when you deal with the Devil so it was round.

Thanks, although one little thing: the girl didn't really make good on her end, she was trying to get out of it by offering two others. I guess if you didn't catch that, that points to a major flaw in my story/directing.

Direction - I think that you had some decent shots going on in the devil scenes. Otherwise, a bit of framing practice is in order. Sometimes the camera looked more surveillance than not.

Haha "surveillance" I like that. Yes, I definitely need practice in framing. Looking back, I didn't really have very dramatic shots or anything. I can only hope my second film is better.

Acting - Quite bad on all accounts aside from your sleazy Devil. He was pretty much okay as a cheesey representation of the devil. Can't do much on a budget but hey. Your actors do know how to stand still well, though.

Well, they're not really actors, so I can't fault them for that. They're the only friends who were willing to help out and step up.

Cine/Lighting - I'm surprised at the even lighting going on here. It actually stood out as the second best part in comparison to your script. Nothing was too extremely dark. I didn't dig the flashback scenes too much but otherwise, not bad.

Thanks.

Editing - I'm only good at commenting on what I see wrong with this subject. I think the entire thing could be sliced down and reworked for time, but that's just me.

I'd be interested to know where you think it dragged/could be cut.

Sound - Sound needs tweak. The score was punchy at the right times. Couldn't hear a lot of what was being said in the kitchen. Could benefit from sound work.

God, yes. I know zip about sound. A major flaw in my film.

Special Effects/Art Direction/Wardrobe - Not sure if I really noticed much special effects aside from the bleeding mouth and the horns. Really simple.

Yeah, I know zip about makeup/fx either, so I wanted to keep it simple. The only vfx was I greenscreened the Mary hitting Anne with the Baseball bat, because I didn't feel comfortable that it could be faked at real speed.

Scariest Moments - Waiting for that dude to crack the chic with the baseball bat. I was waiting for it, dude.

Overall consensus - Not a bad entry. I don't think you'd reshoot, so I would recommend recutting for length. Cool deal, dude. Thanks for exhibiting.

Thanks for the nice, honest, in depth review.

 

[Jaime V]

Just watched your flick...

I loved the story.. and thought the devildude worked really well...
The scenes in the kitchen were hard to hear..
and no head cracking man were was the head cracking ok there was this one --> good expectation reversal..

Thanks Michael, I'm glad you found it enjoyable, other than the sound.

 

[TheatreGuy]

Hey apollyon, I first want to apologize for not getting to your film sooner!!! I don't understand how I missed it. I guess I should have gone alphebetically!!!

I liked your story. I felt that you set it up nicely. The one thing that I would have done differently was to have maybe started out on (or showed a flash of it somewhere) a calander with the date circled. This only came to mind when she was downstairs and mention something like "this was the day" that the devils contract had come up. I think that it would have been a very interesting element. Especially if you opened on this in the beginning and then told your story. It would have been a nice "a-ha!" moment.

Secondly, I was confused by the second sacrifice. Why was there two people being offered up? Give the Devil a little bonus or something? Sweeten the deal? If so, I would have added this in her dialogue.

But I thought that you told the stroy well.

The cinematography was pretty dark and flat. Something that I am sure you will improve upon.

The framing of your subjects could be better. And at one point with the two ladies at the table, you broke the 180 rule. You had both women talking in the same direction. It's pretty subtle. I've seen a much worse violation of this rule in the fest, but I thought that I would bring it up.

The sound is just, um... well... it's awful. Sorry. I don't mean to be so rude. It was very difficult to understand your actors.

The actors did a servicable job, but I didn't enjoy their performances. I am an actor and I am always especially hard in this department.

There is a lot of good work that you did in your film. You told the story and that is not easy. You had some nice shots. The one from the basement looking up is real nice. And the flashback onto the intruder seq. is well done.

I don't know how many films you have under your belt, but i imagine that you are just starting out. If so, you did a fine job.

Congratulations on your work! I see promising potential here!!!

Looking forward to what you do next. Seriously!

Keep at it!

Ted

 

[Jaime V]

Hey apollyon, I first want to apologize for not getting to your film sooner!!! I don't understand how I missed it. I guess I should have gone alphebetically!!!

No apology necessary

I liked your story. I felt that you set it up nicely. The one thing that I would have done differently was to have maybe started out on (or showed a flash of it somewhere) a calander with the date circled. This only came to mind when she was downstairs and mention something like "this was the day" that the devils contract had come up. I think that it would have been a very interesting element. Especially if you opened on this in the beginning and then told your story. It would have been a nice "a-ha!" moment.

I tried to show this via her saying it happened "3 years ago today" and then her saying she only got 3 years. Obviously, it needs to be clearer I guess.

Secondly, I was confused by the second sacrifice. Why was there two people being offered up? Give the Devil a little bonus or something? Sweeten the deal? If so, I would have added this in her dialogue.

But I thought that you told the stroy well.

Yeah you're right...that was in the original, but didn't survive the cut...I should have done something with that.

The cinematography was pretty dark and flat. Something that I am sure you will improve upon.

The framing of your subjects could be better. And at one point with the two ladies at the table, you broke the 180 rule. You had both women talking in the same direction. It's pretty subtle. I've seen a much worse violation of this rule in the fest, but I thought that I would bring it up.

Yeah, I only realized I crossed the line when I was editing...and I was like...oh crap. Didn't have time to reshoot it.

The sound is just, um... well... it's awful. Sorry. I don't mean to be so rude. It was very difficult to understand your actors.

Saying my sound was awful is an insult to awful sound everywhere. I'm flattered that it even deserves an 'awful'.

The actors did a servicable job, but I didn't enjoy their performances. I am an actor and I am always especially hard in this department.

I understand. They aren't real actors, just my friends. I feel bad that I convinced them to do this for me...I hope they don't read this thread I can't blame them...only myself. They put themselves out there in front of everyone for my project.

There is a lot of good work that you did in your film. You told the story and that is not easy. You had some nice shots. The one from the basement looking up is real nice. And the flashback onto the intruder seq. is well done.

I don't know how many films you have under your belt, but i imagine that you are just starting out. If so, you did a fine job.

Congratulations on your work! I see promising potential here!!!

Looking forward to what you do next. Seriously!

Keep at it!

Ted

Yeah, it's my first film. Thanks for taking the time to watch, and review Ted, I sincerely appreciate it. I will definitely be in the next fest...unless it's a musical ;-)

 

[TheatreGuy]

LOL!!! :grin: (musical comment!)

Well, great for you for getting your first film done and submitted. There are a lot of people who can't even say that!!!

And good for you for getting your friends to act in your film. That is not always easy to do! In the future, try posting casting notices. You have the skills to make a film (as you've shown) and actors ALWAYS love to be in films!!!

Go get 'em!

You did a great job, especially considering this was your first!

Ted

 

[Lingothree]

Hello -

Sorry it took me so long to get to your thread. Darn alphabet.

I really, really liked your story. And really liked the way it ended. Again, another one of the few that told a proper story and had a proper ending. I'm sorry if this has already been commented (no time to read all the threads now!!), but what really killed it for me was when the two lead actresses spelled out the story quite literally for us while drinking wine in the dining room. I didn't think that was necessary at all - the flashback for the most part gave us the backstory, so we didn't need the actresses to spell it all out in the dialogue.

Great work on your first try!

 

[Mark Harris]

Okay, what I don't quite understand is, why she brings the GUY downstairs, when she already has the GIRL to give to the Devil?

But that said, I LOVE this story. Kholi said it was tired, and yes, it's been done since the Twilight Zone, but it's still a very cool story. And you structured it well. I read this is the first thing you've shot. Is it the first thing you've written too?

Clearly you know the things that need work:

Sound, definitely. Sound sucks ass, and will be the bain of your existence for eternity, and will make you wish you were dead. It's ten times harder to control than the image. Just to let you know, it will be hard forever, so just hunker down and start practicing.

Acting. But I think you can help those actors along by cutting quicker and L-cuts, cutting to one actor while the other is speaking. I think you can really help their performances by getting us through the stuff we need to know and getting on with the story. I've salvaged some not so great performances that way in the past.

Also what Lingothree said about the exposition. Yes, you might clean some of that up, but it might also be aided with better acting, so that the one girl is USING THE STORY to ENTICE the other girl into helping her. In which case, you might play with some precondition on the scene, like the other girl has to go to yoga or something, and our girl has to CONVINCE her to stay. Just some ideas on activating that dialogue a little more, so it's not just one person explaining to the other.

And in general I think ALL of your cuts can be quicker. You can get a TON of information into the viewer's head in a split second - picture worth a thousand words and all that. So I would experiment with that.

But this was fun, I thought.

 

[Jaime V]

Lingo, Desperate,

Thanks for watching and thanks for the great advice. Yes, first time writing too. First time everything.

I think I see what you're saying about the cuts; I think that's great and now that you mention it, I can see it in others pieces, and see how it works. I had to google L-Cut heheh.

I'll work on that exposition too.

Thanks for taking the time to watch and post.

 

[jpbankesmercer]

Acting: Devil was great, who would have thought such an innocent looking girl could be such a heartless killer?
Script: Great twist.:thumbup:
Direction: Liked how you spiced it up.
Music: Liked the music thought the compression hurt you here on the voices. Damm QT!
Editing: Some tasty ideas here.
Lighting: Even.
Loved: The titles/ transitions, the first tracking shot although wanted a little less headroom, that slap Foley, (ouch!) The stop motion, (excellent idea), hitting her friend with the bat, didn’t see that coming, second set of stop-motions ,(I love this directorial device), the ending. The devil’s horns, (think it’s only you and me bud that went with the old horn cliché!:thumbup: )
Hated: Some of the framings, just too much room either at the sides or headroom.
Overall: O.K. the story was a little loose at times but I thought you brought everything around with a great ending and some nice direction. Good job!

J.P.

PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS ON 'BROEKN CIRCLE' (THANKS)

 

[TheatreGuy]

apollyon, best of luck to you! I enjoyed the story you told and look forward to seeing you grow!

This has been a great fest!

Thanks so much!

Till the next one,

Ted

 

[jpbankesmercer]

Best of luck guys!