SHORT: "Cans"

[makkea]

Hi, community!

I just wanted to sho you my VERY FISRT short film. It's only 3 minute long, and it's not a masterpiece.

It has some obvious errors, such as light ones (there are scenes with changing light in every take, I've noticed it, don't worry).
This was done in a weekend, so I didn't have much time to postprocess it... Most shots don't have any editing.

If you could please leave your opinions (as long as they are constructive) and advice I will be very grateful!

Thanks a lot in advance!

PS: I composed and played the music, you can comment about it too

 

[makkea]

Please guys, help me a bit! I want to know how can I improve, what errors did I do... Please!

 

[norvan5]

I really liked it. Charming, solid story. I hope Coca-Cola are paying you for the product placement too!!!

Technique-wise, I'm no expert so I wouldn't presume to advise you too much. I did notice a lot of jumping auto-focus going on which was distracting in places. There's exposure issues around 0:36 and elsewhere too. But generally you seemed to me to put the camera in just the right place, with good framing of the shots (though maybe you could have done a more interesting angle on the recurring alarm clock shots). The music suited the piece and worked. I look forward to seeing your next film!

 

[makkea]

I really liked it. Charming, solid story. I hope Coca-Cola are paying you for the product placement too!!!

Technique-wise, I'm no expert so I wouldn't presume to advise you too much. I did notice a lot of jumping auto-focus going on which was distracting in places. There's exposure issues around 0:36 and elsewhere too. But generally you seemed to me to put the camera in just the right place, with good framing of the shots (though maybe you could have done a more interesting angle on the recurring alarm clock shots). The music suited the piece and worked. I look forward to seeing your next film!

Woo, thanks a lot! That comment was really motivating
Thanks for your advices, I'll try to do these things better next time!

 

[ZetKey]

Wow, Sony is beaten by hand and Cola is a trash or for the trash. This is deep, man!

 

[Sunk99]

I enjoyed the story. Very good for a first. Better than most. Agree, lots of color issues. Not sure why you couldn't takee xtra time to color correct - I assume a deadline. The music was very good. Agree with others - stomps on Coke copyright. Like the theme. Plot wise - so before that first morning he didn't throw his coke cans down? Might have worked better if he lobbed them over a fence. Look forward to seeing more. --TimMc

 

[makkea]

Wow, Sony is beaten by hand and Cola is a trash or for the trash. This is deep, man!

Lol, that was fun.

I enjoyed the story. Very good for a first. Better than most. Agree, lots of color issues. Not sure why you couldn't takee xtra time to color correct - I assume a deadline. The music was very good. Agree with others - stomps on Coke copyright. Like the theme. Plot wise - so before that first morning he didn't throw his coke cans down? Might have worked better if he lobbed them over a fence. Look forward to seeing more. --TimMc

Thanks a lot for your constructive comment. Yes, I didn't have much time to postproduce because of a strict deadline (which in the end turned out not to be so strict). We talked to Coca-cola and they seem to have authorized us to distribute this short, they say there's no problem. About the plot, yes, there are some inconsistencies, but most of the short is symbolic, but yeah, we could have been a little more accurate with those things. Again, thanks a lot for your opinion

 

[richke]

You mentioned the color issues...alot of times you can fix that in post to get each shot to match up a little better, but it wasn't that bad. The thing that bothered me probably the most was the inaccuracy of the Depth of Field. Not that you did it...it was cool...but often you over shot the focal point and then came back...that might have been intentional but to me it is a little sloppy.(Coffecup shot and a couple can shots) but other times you nail it and it looked great. Trust me that is a tough thing to do and most the time I avoid change the DOF mid shot because I mess it up Overall it is a nice start and the music fits very nicely. Keep it up...keep shooting...I have been shooting for about 4 or 5 years now and I am always learning

 

[makkea]

You mentioned the color issues...alot of times you can fix that in post to get each shot to match up a little better, but it wasn't that bad. The thing that bothered me probably the most was the inaccuracy of the Depth of Field. Not that you did it...it was cool...but often you over shot the focal point and then came back...that might have been intentional but to me it is a little sloppy.(Coffecup shot and a couple can shots) but other times you nail it and it looked great. Trust me that is a tough thing to do and most the time I avoid change the DOF mid shot because I mess it up Overall it is a nice start and the music fits very nicely. Keep it up...keep shooting...I have been shooting for about 4 or 5 years now and I am always learning

Thanks a lot! Yes, I am not very accurate with changing focus during the shot, I'll try to improve on that. And yes, I'll keep shooting, it was a fantastic experience!!