Autonomous

[krestofre]

And I didn't understand the Judge's desire to tag along -- why did she 'owe him that much'? Completely unmotivated.

I disagree there. I think that enough seeds were planted in the script that the judge has a connection to DR-8841 to make that a plausible course of action. To my eyes everyone has proper motivation, but I have the benefit of knowing where the story has been and where it's going. In my opinion motivation is one of the first things to go out the window when writing short fiction. I think an author always does (or should) know why a character is motivated, but in shorts the audience has a greater responsibility to "go with it." This applies to short fiction as well. Read a collection of short stories and they're mostly just snippets of events. Rarely do you get a compelling three act structure in short work. That's my take on it at least. I've been wrong before.

I also felt there was far too little description of the locations. I had no idea who was sitting (or standing) where in either courtroom scene. I need to have the scene set for me before the action begins. Maybe that's just me.

It works the other way too: Maybe it's just me, because I have a strong belief that those sorts of details are the purview of the director. I always write scripts that "barebones" if you will because I don't want to interfere with another person's creative take on the project. I only put in scene descriptions or directions that are required for the story. If it's a script that I know I'm going to be directing then I'm very detailed, even describing camera moves as script elements. Different strokes....

One other thing. Obviously when Stuart 'killed' DR-8841, there was no law on the books making that a crime. Clearly, by the end of the story such a law had been enacted, but how could it possibly be made retroactive so that Stuart could be on trial for murdering DR-8841???

Excellent question. I wonder what happens during those six months.

Thanks for reading and giving your honest feedback!

 

[Horncastle]

I thought you had a great idea here - philosophical/moral questions regarding future technological progress provide a lot of wonderful food for thought in my opinion. The script itself had a few flaws maybe, but these have been covered by others above and I see you didn't have much time to go over it anyway.
Jason

 

[thartley]

Nothing bad to say about this one. Maybe could have done with more punch at the end, but I liked the story. I have not read the other reviews so I am not sure if I am being a jerk here, but I wondered why the paramedics would be called for a robot or Servo instead of "Call the IT Guys!" just kidding, but that line right there made me think that maybe the Servos were more on the same playing field with humans than we initially might think. Or that the two (humans and Servos) were beginning to overlap in some areas.

Good story.

 

[agalla1]

I enjoyed the story...I agree that I was little lost with the motivation of the judge to tag along or why she had such a vested interest but you explained it well in your comments...loved the end...I felt the emotion the judge must have been feeling at that moment....definitely put a smile on my face!

 

[Michael Anthony Horrigan]

I understood why the Judge tagged along, seemed obvious to me.
Very well written, interesting take on the theme as well.

I went through it fast and it never dragged. Nice work!

Mike

 

[krestofre]

Thanks for the comments everyone!

Call the IT guys. Funny.

My apologize to any scripts that I haven't got to yet. I promise I'll read and comment before Friday!