"Admonition" - Dead End Films

You might be surprised to know that the "girl" at the end on the phone was in fact, not a girl. It was Ed (the guy in the red shirt) using some digital voice modulators.
 
The best part of this story was the surprise ending. When we watched your film it gave us that little surprise and "oh" feeling. Thinking of the story with that ending in mind how could you make that news more shocking? Rather than hearing about all the technical stuff maybe you could have invested some of your time in showing us the relationship between that guy and his girl friend. What ever we show in our stories it should make the audience feel something about these characters.

keep up the good work. look forward to your next film!
 
Hey man,

Just caught the flick. I dig the story and the twist was nice. I think the pacing is way off, kinda slow, and that they were taking one beat and stretching it out over the time. But it was a valiant endeavor.

Can't wait to see what you do next.
 
I like the story. The ending is perfect. However, it was too slow to watch. If you somehow could speed it up then it would be perfect. The footage is kind of dark for me and some parts are noisy. I'm not sure if it's because of the compression or not. The resolution of the whole movie is also low which reduces the overall quality. Other than these glitches, your movie was actually nice to watch. You did great job.
 
I liked the twist at the end, although not keen on the acting (better than some I've seen in the fest though). The background 'noise' didn't really do it for me either.
 
Congratulations on finishing. Its quite an accomplishment.

The first thing I'd like to suggest is that you study this concept here-
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/180_degree_rule

That should improve your next project a great deal.

Also when you point the camera at people, give them some nose room. Meaning if they are looking to the right... talking to someone on the right, there should be space to the right of them inside your frame. it will make things flow alot better.

SPOILER.


You had a cute idea, and I liked the twist. Honestly I thought he was setting up an alibai and was going to kill the red shirt geek but you want a little less sinister which was refreshing and nice.
 
Yeah, nice idea in here. I particularly like the super-simple but very effective device of the cell phone into the future. When they had the first call between themselves, I thought: "that's an idea I wish I had had." So simple but so perfect.

And the twist is nice too.

Keep working on the skills, find people to team up with. Like I said, the ideas in here are good.
 
It's little stuff like that "180 degree rule" I think that will really help us out. It's always the little stuff that ends up making a project 90% better. It's that last 10% that gets everyone stumped... I think that really applies to anything, not just film.

Sorry for the rambling, can't help it sometimes.
 
Okay, that guitar strumming drove me to distraction, if it had gone on much longer you'd have lost me altogether.

"Tell me these last seven years might be paying off." What were they, like 12 when they started?

I thought the ending was definitely a nice twist.
 
Writing as I watch….
Ok, so I didn’t’ write anything until the end. I think the film could still use a little work on the editing. You could probably chop this down to 3.5/4 minutes and still have the same impact. The heavy metal music at the beginning and end set a tone, but not the tone I was expecting. I think a few more seconds at the end could really bring in the impact, and a better VO of the GF could have been better executed. It felt as though she was reading from the script.

The actors.. eh. Not so much.
Camera work… I think you could have done so many more close ups and more interesting compositions of framing.

Keep at it steven and looking forward to your next film.
Congrats on entering
 
As the fest here comes to an end I would just like to thank everyone who posted here and commented on our film. I can't wait to start working on the next fest.
Also, congrats to all the finalists.
 
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