SHORT: A Grievous Farewell (2011)

D

david-

Member
Hi,
I'm new here but it seems like a serious and great community!
My name is David HJ. Lindberg, 18 years old from Sweden and have been working with films for 2 years now.

This summer I made this film to show what I'm capable of in a cinematographic way. I focused on the cinematography and color grading which are the things I'm planning to work with in the future. Need to be said, I'm not a director so the story isn't perfect, haha.
All shot by Canon 550D/T2i

Hope you find something interesting!


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Why are there English subtitles when the audio track is in English?

Slow motion is used to good effect and you have a really nice setting that you seem to make the most of. Shot composition is pretty good as well. A couple of shots have focus problems: when the infected man is running at them in slow motion and then with the protagonist at 2:54. I can understand how you may not have been easily able to do retakes with the former, but the latter should have been fixed.
 
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COME ON!!!! This is amazing for anyone let alone an 18 year old... not only are the images really beautiful but you can plainly see how many of them can be "payoffs" or "moments" in a more rigourously constructed narrative. He did say he was focusing mainly on the cinematography.

david your vimeo page is outrageous! Noticed you got a thumbs up from the legendary matthew brown! jealous!!!

you know what, I'm going to add a few critiques just so i don't come across as a total cheerleader:
a) is there a way to emphasize the "build" in the piece? It seems like it wants to build towards a crescendo, but might need a little nudging...
b) maybe a bit more variety in the pacing...a few quick shot-reverse shots or even flash cuts to keep the viewer off-kilter
c) keep an eye on lighting continuity? Obviously the story happens over several days, but a few of the overcast shots a little jarring?
d) i guess i also wonder why you went with an english audio track?

whatever though, let this one shine as is, and destroy all comers with the next!
 
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Gary Huff said:
Why are there English subtitles when the audio track is in English?

Slow motion is used to good effect and you have a really nice setting that you seem to make the most of. Shot composition is pretty good as well. A couple of shots have focus problems: when the infected man is running at them in slow motion and then with the protagonist at 2:54. I can understand how you may not have been easily able to do retakes with the former, but the latter should have been fixed.
Click to expand...

Thank you very much for the critics! The reason why I wanted to get this film subtitled was because we aren't that good understanding English in Sweden, so I just wanted it to be as easy as possible for the audience to understand the story. Maybe somewhere in the film the music over power the narration and that would make it harder to hear if there was no subtitles.

Yeah, the focus problems will follow me as long as I'm shooting with my t2i i think, haha. It is so hard to follow someone running with manual focus. But of course it can be done, I just have to be better!

Thanks again!
 
ThisHideousReplica said:
COME ON!!!! This is amazing for anyone let alone an 18 year old... not only are the images really beautiful but you can plainly see how many of them can be "payoffs" or "moments" in a more rigourously constructed narrative. He did say he was focusing mainly on the cinematography.

david your vimeo page is outrageous! Noticed you got a thumbs up from the legendary matthew brown! jealous!!!

you know what, I'm going to add a few critiques just so i don't come across as a total cheerleader:
a) is there a way to emphasize the "build" in the piece? It seems like it wants to build towards a crescendo, but might need a little nudging...
b) maybe a bit more variety in the pacing...a few quick shot-reverse shots or even flash cuts to keep the viewer off-kilter
c) keep an eye on lighting continuity? Obviously the story happens over several days, but a few of the overcast shots a little jarring?
d) i guess i also wonder why you went with an english audio track?

whatever though, let this one shine as is, and destroy all comers with the next!
Click to expand...

Thank you very much! I really appreciate it!
Haha actually I don't have a clue who Matthew Brown is, but I guess that's good.

Yea I think you're totally right! I should have been variate the story a bit more with some quicker shots and some small turns in the story.

Yeah, I should have been mixed the lightning a bit more. Actually it would be cool if the last scenes when he is tied up are in the night. But though my camera is very bad in low-light conditions I decided to shoot all the scenes while the sun was giving some good lights.

I wanted to use an English narration though I thought it would feel a bit more international, and maybe give the film a bigger audience. But maybe I was wrong :)

Thanks again!
 
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