"The Contract" - A film by Neal Buconjic

jefflebowski said:
I was immediately drawn to Nick. His acting is a cut above and I'd say he was cast well.

The script itself is yet another play on the concept of selling your soul to the devil, which for me, never gets old. So, good going on the basic premise. I felt drawn in immediately which is a good thing because I have found many of these shorts tend to stall in the beginning. I also appreciated the special effects. From a writers standpoint, I would have done one thing differently. Nick essentially spilled his guts (talking to dead Oscar) about his deal with Santana. I would left a little to to viewers imagination. Perhaps a more cryptic explanation of Nick's own deal would have sufficed and then Nick openly inviting the guitar player into the bar would confirm that he is working for Santana.

Overall, great story...one of the better ones. Bravo
Click to expand...

Thanks for the feedback, Jeff.

It's interesting that you should bring up Nick's confession from a writing perspective. I wrestled with this a bit. After getting some feedback on the early drafts of the script, I opted to not pull any punches and simply have Nick explain "why".
We don't have much time to pull it all together in six minutes and in the past I've watched some shorts and "didn't get it". I decided that I'd leave no doubt in the viewers mind. I'll admit, you bring up an interesting new take on this though... I'm going to edit an alternate ending and see how that feels. At least if the viewer still has no idea that Nick is "an agent" of Santana's, then what plays out in the final scene won't be so predictable.

Thanks for giving me something to mull over, Jeff. I appreciate it.
 
stinkpot said:
Neal, I enjoyed your story. It felt kind of rushed in parts but that's what a six minute time limit will do to you sometimes :) The fire effects looked good and were not overdone. I especially liked what you did with the charred body. Good film and well worth watching.

Hope to see more of your stuff soon.

:beer:
Click to expand...


Thanks, stinkpot. I'll drink to that! :beer:

Yep, I agree the pace was quite quick until Nick's confession. You're right, the six minute limit kept most of the "fluff" out of the film, so it tended to race along. If you read some of the past posts, then you know that I had to cut more than three minutes from the running time. It was a challenge to say the least!

I'm glad you like the charred body. It was time consuming to apply the makeup and as I learned from the actor - to remove it as well! He said it took him an hour and a half! (It was stuck in his arm hair - ouch!)

I'll have to post some pics.

Thanks for watching and for the comments.
 
Neal Buconjic said:
At least in your film (good BTW), your central character had the fortitude to resist!
Click to expand...

Ah, thanks for noticing. That's something about the script I'm particularly fond of in that in most sell your soul to the devil movies the main character sells his soul, then finds out it's a crappy deal, and the rest of the movie is about how he gets out of the deal. In my film the twist is that he doesn't take the deal and instead lives with what he's got and who he is.

Neal Buconjic said:
It's interesting that you should bring up Nick's confession from a writing perspective. I wrestled with this a bit. After getting some feedback on the early drafts of the script, I opted to not pull any punches and simply have Nick explain "why".
Click to expand...

I appreciate that sentiment a lot. Too often "why" is hidden way too deeply by short filmmakers, and after I read your response to this comment I came up with an idea on how to do it a little differently. Don't you just hate that when somebody tells you, "hey, how about doing it this way instead?" I know I do. But since I've already started writing this post I'll do it anyway.

You could have a brief explanatory "flashback" (ugh I hate that word, sorry) scene with Santana and Nick, showing Nick wanting to get out of his deal and Santana demanding five souls in return. It would kind of show the viewer what the deal is rather than tell him. Well, it's an idea anyway.
 
John LaBonney said:
You could have a brief explanatory "flashback" (ugh I hate that word, sorry) scene with Santana and Nick, showing Nick wanting to get out of his deal and Santana demanding five souls in return. It would kind of show the viewer what the deal is rather than tell him. Well, it's an idea anyway.
Click to expand...

Thanks for your thoughts on this John. At what point would you have this "flashback"?

You know, I've read time and again that it's ALWAYS better to SHOW the viewer than to TELL them. I wanted to recreate his whole monologue so we could see it play out against his VO. Unfortunately, I thought it would be too much work to dress the set for the 70's, get appropriate wardrobe, hair, etc. It certainly would have been easy enough to have Nick and Santana discussing the revised deal though.

Food for thought. Thanks.
 
stinkpot said:
I especially liked what you did with the charred body. Good film and well worth watching.
Click to expand...

Here's some stills of the makeup process.

1225925763.jpg


1225925841.jpg


1225926475.jpg

Red for mid-burn shots
1225926512.jpg

Darker for the final burn shots
1225926056.jpg

That's one nasty looking arm
1225926095.jpg

Extra crispy
 
Neal Buconjic said:
Thanks for your thoughts on this John. At what point would you have this "flashback"?
Click to expand...

In my humble opinion, which is worth exactly what you paid for it (and I want a raise, by the way!), I would show Nick drinking, sad, in despair, silent, and then go to a scene where he and Santana discuss Nick getting out of the deal, then back to the knock at the door.
 
I also thought it was very interesting that you had to ace-deuce a couple of the magic tricks because they were too good.
 
John LaBonney said:
In my humble opinion, which is worth exactly what you paid for it (and I want a raise, by the way!), I would show Nick drinking, sad, in despair, silent, and then go to a scene where he and Santana discuss Nick getting out of the deal, then back to the knock at the door.
Click to expand...

Makes perfect sense. Oh - I spoke to the producer about your raise - we can double the amount you've been paid thus far. I fought hard for that, John!:)
 
After all the devil flicks in this fest, I thought this one was the best. Clever ending. The fire sfx fell apart in a few places. don't know how you would fix that. like when santana first showed the fire, and his hands moved and the fire didn't
 
Dick Campbell said:
After all the devil flicks in this fest, I thought this one was the best. Clever ending. The fire sfx fell apart in a few places. don't know how you would fix that. like when santana first showed the fire, and his hands moved and the fire didn't
Click to expand...

Thanks for taking the time to comment, Dick.

How do I fix the sfx? By doing them over. Each of the "fire shots" are being re-done. I've got five shots remaining...
 
Dick Campbell said:
After all the devil flicks in this fest, I thought this one was the best. Clever ending. The fire sfx fell apart in a few places. don't know how you would fix that. like when santana first showed the fire, and his hands moved and the fire didn't
Click to expand...


I have to take exception to this, when Santana first shots the fire, it is a deas on match move with the hand, it isn't untill Neal added footage that I never had that the track falls apart. in between the line you can see the change over from my comp to Neals ("now" and "shall I grand you dominion over fire") and the portion where he says "or somthing" those are actually 3d flames, and they track correctly as well.
 
Jason Miller said:
it isn't untill Neal added footage that I never had that the track falls apart. in between the line you can see the change over from my comp to Neal's
Click to expand...

Good point Jason. As stated in an earlier post, I had to "add" six seconds worth of flaming hands to a comp that Jason had already completed. I didn't know what I was doing and the tracking wasn't that great. I must admit, I'm worlds better now.
 
Jason Miller said:
are you reshooting the black box elements with a more matte black color?
Click to expand...

So far I haven't needed to. I've been placing the subject about 6-7 feet in front of the black background. There have been no reflections on the background, but I have yet to shoot the full body burns... that'll likley throw some light.
 
Not only did I use the required leader and ball element, but I also did some DVXuser product placement in the film.

I'll bet no one looked twice at the beer bottle in the screen grab below?
1226102853.jpg


Here's a CU of the bottle.
1226102293.jpg


Thanks to Mike Manning for making the label for me.
 
I must admit I am a sucker for the "sell your soul" theme and you had a great twist at the end.

Story wise, I think it was overall good. I didnt quite feel where the Bar owner was talking to himself and talking to the dead guy. I think he could have been talking to Santana to reveal he was behind it.

Shots; I think you did a pretty good job, there were a few that werent quite there for me, for example, 4.21 on the Bar owner, was too much headroom. I thought the lighting to was pretty solid as far as appearing natural and not overstated, though it was a bit two dimensional at times.

The Bar Owner was the best actor for me. Hes got a solid voice. Some of the ADR was a bit out of time.

I liked it.
 
Thanks for the comments Noel.

I see you picked out 4:21. That was the best take and thus why it ended up in this cut, but you're right about the headroom.
I framed the shot while he was sitting in place. But after he put the cap back on the bottle, he leaned further forward than when I had framed it. There was certainly more headroom than I had intended and it wasn't really aesthetically pleasing, but I thought it was the best take.:)

Glad you liked the story. I may get the gang together to shoot a modified ending. I'll take some of the suggestions here into consideration.

I'm thankful for the continued feedback. I'll be very conscious of these things for the next fest.

Cheers,
:beer:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top