Michael Anthony Horrigan
More Cowbell Pictures
Yes, I was asking for the DP.
Didn't see it listed on your first page, maybe I missed it.
Cheers,
Mike
"Forgotten" - A film by Gabriel Florit
- Thread starter gabrielflorit
- Start date
Didn't see it listed on your first page, maybe I missed it.
Cheers,
Mike
Tim Joy
Veteran
Very pro for a first timer! You obviously have nice gear and know how to use it. Image and sound were very good.
The opening was very strong in the imagery and sound/music.
I really felt the need for a camera move to get us into the bar, or a wide shot, more like those fabulous BTS pics. I think a wide shot where she is a speck in the frame could emphasize her desolation and loneliness better. You cut to CU's too quick to fit the pacing for me. Also, because of the 2.35 I felt you had too much headroom on the CU's a lot, and not enough chin-room. I would've backed off a bit.
I liked the script and the dialog, but I wasn't buying her tears at all. It's a heavy-duty emotion to play and she scratched the surface, but only that. If I think about times I've seen women in this state, or even myself, the tears always come in waves, set off by a thought or something someone says. This was all one level of tears. The other acting was pretty good, especially the pharmacist.
If there's one thing I would like to see from you, (I hope we see more, you definitely got talent) it's camera movement.
Well crafted first film, and technically superb. Keep at it.
The opening was very strong in the imagery and sound/music.
I really felt the need for a camera move to get us into the bar, or a wide shot, more like those fabulous BTS pics. I think a wide shot where she is a speck in the frame could emphasize her desolation and loneliness better. You cut to CU's too quick to fit the pacing for me. Also, because of the 2.35 I felt you had too much headroom on the CU's a lot, and not enough chin-room. I would've backed off a bit.
I liked the script and the dialog, but I wasn't buying her tears at all. It's a heavy-duty emotion to play and she scratched the surface, but only that. If I think about times I've seen women in this state, or even myself, the tears always come in waves, set off by a thought or something someone says. This was all one level of tears. The other acting was pretty good, especially the pharmacist.
If there's one thing I would like to see from you, (I hope we see more, you definitely got talent) it's camera movement.
Well crafted first film, and technically superb. Keep at it.
I thought this was very good. Well executed timing of cuts which really helped the mood. It never felt rushed and I felt immersed.
Very very good opening shot. Thats the best way to set up something people will continue to watch.
Visually I thought the exteriors were good. The cabin lighting was great. The bar lighting I wasnt keen on, just felt too bright and looked like there was a spotlight on the bar tender, as in it looked lit as opposed to natural.
Sound. The actual sound edit was pretty good, but I could clearly hear the effects of noise reduction, which would suggest your location sound wasnt what it should be. Something to watch in future.
I liked the story and whilst the finish wasnt BAM, it paced itself nicely IMO and worked pretty well.
Nice.
Very very good opening shot. Thats the best way to set up something people will continue to watch.
Visually I thought the exteriors were good. The cabin lighting was great. The bar lighting I wasnt keen on, just felt too bright and looked like there was a spotlight on the bar tender, as in it looked lit as opposed to natural.
Sound. The actual sound edit was pretty good, but I could clearly hear the effects of noise reduction, which would suggest your location sound wasnt what it should be. Something to watch in future.
I liked the story and whilst the finish wasnt BAM, it paced itself nicely IMO and worked pretty well.
Nice.
Tim Joy
Veteran
I meant to mention that too. I thought it was compression of the audio track (like mp3'ish-type artifacts), but it did go in and out.
deedive
Well-known member
loved the tone and pacing. good soundwork
love all the outdoor lighting (especially on the road with the pharmacist) and in the shack. I have to admit, i didn't know it was her boyfriend/problem siting in the bar at the end til i read some of the thread. In all great work Looking forward to more films.
love all the outdoor lighting (especially on the road with the pharmacist) and in the shack. I have to admit, i didn't know it was her boyfriend/problem siting in the bar at the end til i read some of the thread. In all great work
Looking forward to more films.
mjjason
Well-known member
This is one of the first I have watched. Loved the opening shot. One of the best I have seen in a DVXuser film. Actually that probably doesn't do it justice as it would be up there with any great shot I have seen even in Hollywood films. The overall cinematography was beautiful throughout. The shot with the glasses, the shots in the cabin, the shots on the road; All great.
The story itself didn't fully grab me. I agree with some previous post about a sort of pay-off. This is kind of like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind but that film played with the concept of forgetting someone and had a strong pay-off at the end. With this I kind of sensed where it was leading too at the end, particularly with the bartenders look but it didn't fully sell it for me. I would have thought the bartender would have said something knowing what turmoil the woman was in prior to that. Maybe the concept is that she is destined to repeat her mistake and by erasing her memory she never learns but I just didn't really buy that. I think mostly because someone would have stepped in. Like the bartender.
Also, I echo the comments about the lighting in the bar. The bartender was lit to much and there was alot of fog. The girls shot were better but they were not consistent with the bartender.
Overall, I liked the look of the film. Very strong style and great visuals. The story I think can be slightly improved, mostly for the ending.
The story itself didn't fully grab me. I agree with some previous post about a sort of pay-off. This is kind of like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind but that film played with the concept of forgetting someone and had a strong pay-off at the end. With this I kind of sensed where it was leading too at the end, particularly with the bartenders look but it didn't fully sell it for me. I would have thought the bartender would have said something knowing what turmoil the woman was in prior to that. Maybe the concept is that she is destined to repeat her mistake and by erasing her memory she never learns but I just didn't really buy that. I think mostly because someone would have stepped in. Like the bartender.
Also, I echo the comments about the lighting in the bar. The bartender was lit to much and there was alot of fog. The girls shot were better but they were not consistent with the bartender.
Overall, I liked the look of the film. Very strong style and great visuals. The story I think can be slightly improved, mostly for the ending.
gabrielflorit
Well-known member
Thanks for the detailed comments, I really appreciate it. I agree with you about the lack of movement. Next film I'll shoot with a shouldermount. I also agree about the lead's performance, I now see how she could have used different direction from me - it's true that what she was going through should have elicited more powerful emotions. Thanks for watching! :dankk2:
Yep, I had to clean up the bar audio quite a bit. Next time I'll make sure the boom operator is closer, he was too far. I take the blame for that, I should know better. I'm glad you liked the edit, I spent hours and hours and hours on that. It's really tedious work, but so worth it. The eye always knows best!
loved the tone and pacing. good soundwork
love all the outdoor lighting (especially on the road with the pharmacist) and in the shack. I have to admit, i didn't know it was her boyfriend/problem siting in the bar at the end til i read some of the thread. In all great work
Thanks deedive! I haven't had time to check out your entry, I'll make sure to do that in a day or two.
Thanks for the comments! Alaska has lots of gorgeous locations - I think that helped create a certain mood on this piece.
Gabriel, good job! I pretty much concur what's been said already, exterior shots look great, story was a little too vague, very good production design, loved the music.
You wanted a no holds barred critique, so here it is:
I thought the cast was your biggest problem. The pharmacist looked the part, but even his performance could have been better. Your female lead in particular should have been.
Second to choosing the right script, casting is the most important decision a director can make. Directors rarely get credit for great performances, but they will always be blamed for poor ones. And that's the way it should be. Having the best actors possible just makes everything so much easier. Gives us more time to come up with cool shots!
Your film was really good by any standard, but for a first film, it was outstanding!
Look forward to your next one. :beer:
You wanted a no holds barred critique, so here it is:
I thought the cast was your biggest problem. The pharmacist looked the part, but even his performance could have been better. Your female lead in particular should have been.
Second to choosing the right script, casting is the most important decision a director can make. Directors rarely get credit for great performances, but they will always be blamed for poor ones. And that's the way it should be. Having the best actors possible just makes everything so much easier. Gives us more time to come up with cool shots!
Your film was really good by any standard, but for a first film, it was outstanding!
Look forward to your next one. :beer:
Robbie Comeau
Como's back. back again
Dude,
I think the outside highway scene at the "pharmacy," with the lead actress and the man was the best scene in this whole fest, in terms of lighting, location, and cinematography.
This scene stood out so much, and the shots were so well composed.
Overall, the story didn't do much for me, and the lead actress wasn't the greatest, but she did her part good enough.
If this was a first time making a movie contest, I'd guarantee you the winner. But I think the main thing in this one, which is a personal pref., is the story, and that's what brought it down on this one for me. But, I am very picky with stories. Extremely picky if I must say.
I liked the bar scene, and the server played his part excellent.
Again, nice locations, and overall, the cinematography was my favourite.
Thanks for posting, I might even look at it again for some shot ideas for future projects.
Robbie
I think the outside highway scene at the "pharmacy," with the lead actress and the man was the best scene in this whole fest, in terms of lighting, location, and cinematography.
This scene stood out so much, and the shots were so well composed.
Overall, the story didn't do much for me, and the lead actress wasn't the greatest, but she did her part good enough.
If this was a first time making a movie contest, I'd guarantee you the winner. But I think the main thing in this one, which is a personal pref., is the story, and that's what brought it down on this one for me. But, I am very picky with stories. Extremely picky if I must say.
I liked the bar scene, and the server played his part excellent.
Again, nice locations, and overall, the cinematography was my favourite.
Thanks for posting, I might even look at it again for some shot ideas for future projects.
Robbie
pauly_the_hitman
Veteran
Great cinematography and the locations kicked ass. The story was odd and i guess I must say i didn't quite get it. other then that good job.
Pauly
Pauly
Susanne G.
Well-known member
Very intriguing strory. The score underlined very well the heavy depressiv atmospere. Your actress was pretty good and I really loved the acting of the farmacist. The framing on the house in the snow was a very beautiful detail. Very enjoyable film - compliments! Here only some little minor things which confused me: the light during the dialog of the actress and the barman - I am not an expert on tecnical things, but it seemed to me that the barman had to much light in comparison to her. The other thing is that I felt the fade outs a little bit to long. All together - well done! :thumbup:
Susanne
Susanne
Dick Campbell
Veteran
nicely done, good telling. you get the ending without being obvious. overall, good photography. was distracted by the different lighting between the bartender and the girl in the early bar scene, like they were not in the same room.
jefflebowski
Member
Wow, I'd say that was the best location I've seen so far. Beautiful filming and great acting; I especially like the pharmacist. I felt the story was OK despite previous posts. There is a little message to take away and that's about all you can hope for in six minutes. Nice job.
Ben Sliker
Pain In The Ass 2.0
Carrying on the tradition from Timefest, the AIM sessions have returned, a live stream of whatever may come out of our heads as we watch your films. Here are Ben Sliker, Brad Mate's thoughts on "Forgotten."
11:35:27 PM Ben Sliker: got forgotten?
11:36:17 PM Brad Mate: yes
11:36:22 PM Ben Sliker: rdy?
11:36:37 PM Brad Mate: yes
11:36:40 PM Ben Sliker: 3
11:36:41 PM Ben Sliker: 2
11:36:42 PM Ben Sliker: 1
11:36:43 PM Ben Sliker: go
11:37:18 PM Brad Mate: is this the thing 2?
11:37:25 PM Ben Sliker: another box story ... hmm ...
11:37:30 PM Brad Mate: boxes are in this year
11:37:43 PM Ben Sliker: this bar has such bright lighting ... the bars i go to are a bit darker.
11:38:16 PM Brad Mate: i think the sun is having a drink on the other end of the bar
11:38:18 PM Ben Sliker: why have this awesomely wide frame if you are going to put the actor in the middle.
11:38:44 PM Ben Sliker: the lighting is also inconsistent between the two actors
11:39:01 PM Ben Sliker: the (screen) right side of here shoulder be whiter and brighter.
11:39:15 PM Ben Sliker: AWESOME FOG ... seriously. awesome setting.
11:39:36 PM Ben Sliker: who are these people?
11:39:55 PM Ben Sliker: ARE YOU THE KEYMASTER?
11:40:01 PM Ben Sliker: IM THE GATEKEEPER.
11:40:42 PM Ben Sliker: BLACK SPACES
11:41:11 PM Ben Sliker: not a fan.
11:41:51 PM Brad Mate: if she forgets the last ten years, wouldnt she forget about the box and keep looking in it when she wakes up?
11:42:09 PM Ben Sliker: that's quite a question ... unless she used it before 10 years before that.
11:42:16 PM Brad Mate: or freak teh poo poo out when she realizes that shes 10 years older than she was before?
11:42:35 PM Ben Sliker: maybe there's no mirrors in siberia, where they apparently are.
11:43:20 PM Brad Mate: well. i thought the actors fit the roles which is more than you can say about a lot of dvxuser films. i also thought the locations were excellent even though the bar was way too bright
11:43:33 PM Ben Sliker: it was nice to see a film that was shot and lit nicely, and had great audio.
11:43:55 PM Brad Mate: yeah it definiately had a nice quality to it
11:44:02 PM Ben Sliker: not sure about the edits and black spaces
11:44:33 PM Ben Sliker: as far as story goes, i think it took a long time to get to a very simple story.
11:44:36 PM Brad Mate: i think the story was a little lacking. even with teh plot holes just the whole box thing is played. and we are seeing it more than once in this fest
11:45:06 PM Ben Sliker: how did she know about the box in the first place?
11:45:17 PM Ben Sliker: cause all she went to that other guy for was the key.
11:45:42 PM Brad Mate: yeah, and if it wasnt her first time doing it who took the key back?
11:46:47 PM Brad Mate: and the bartender seems to knwo about the box...so why is he suprised when she comes back with a clean slate
11:47:02 PM Ben Sliker: you are making my brain hurt.
11:47:10 PM Ben Sliker: with your LOGIC.
Just grazed over the comments that have been made so far, so I apologize if I'm "the repeater" on anything. We really felt like we needed to know just a LITTLE bit more or a LITTLE bit less about the box for us to not have a bunch of questions in the end. But, of course, that's the paradox when you have a short that's about manipulating time. The repeated black spaces always says "trailer" to me, and is an editing decision i rarely make. You really made the most of some beautiful locations and set a high production value for yourself. Like we said in the session, it was nice to be able to watch a film and not have to make too many technical notes. (Which is probably why we came up with so many story questions.) I really can't believe that this is your first effort, I have a feeling you are going to be a force to be reckoned with in future fests (if not this one!) Cheers! :beer:
11:35:27 PM Ben Sliker: got forgotten?
11:36:17 PM Brad Mate: yes
11:36:22 PM Ben Sliker: rdy?
11:36:37 PM Brad Mate: yes
11:36:40 PM Ben Sliker: 3
11:36:41 PM Ben Sliker: 2
11:36:42 PM Ben Sliker: 1
11:36:43 PM Ben Sliker: go
11:37:18 PM Brad Mate: is this the thing 2?
11:37:25 PM Ben Sliker: another box story ... hmm ...
11:37:30 PM Brad Mate: boxes are in this year
11:37:43 PM Ben Sliker: this bar has such bright lighting ... the bars i go to are a bit darker.
11:38:16 PM Brad Mate: i think the sun is having a drink on the other end of the bar
11:38:18 PM Ben Sliker: why have this awesomely wide frame if you are going to put the actor in the middle.
11:38:44 PM Ben Sliker: the lighting is also inconsistent between the two actors
11:39:01 PM Ben Sliker: the (screen) right side of here shoulder be whiter and brighter.
11:39:15 PM Ben Sliker: AWESOME FOG ... seriously. awesome setting.
11:39:36 PM Ben Sliker: who are these people?
11:39:55 PM Ben Sliker: ARE YOU THE KEYMASTER?
11:40:01 PM Ben Sliker: IM THE GATEKEEPER.
11:40:42 PM Ben Sliker: BLACK SPACES
11:41:11 PM Ben Sliker: not a fan.
11:41:51 PM Brad Mate: if she forgets the last ten years, wouldnt she forget about the box and keep looking in it when she wakes up?
11:42:09 PM Ben Sliker: that's quite a question ... unless she used it before 10 years before that.
11:42:16 PM Brad Mate: or freak teh poo poo out when she realizes that shes 10 years older than she was before?
11:42:35 PM Ben Sliker: maybe there's no mirrors in siberia, where they apparently are.
11:43:20 PM Brad Mate: well. i thought the actors fit the roles which is more than you can say about a lot of dvxuser films. i also thought the locations were excellent even though the bar was way too bright
11:43:33 PM Ben Sliker: it was nice to see a film that was shot and lit nicely, and had great audio.
11:43:55 PM Brad Mate: yeah it definiately had a nice quality to it
11:44:02 PM Ben Sliker: not sure about the edits and black spaces
11:44:33 PM Ben Sliker: as far as story goes, i think it took a long time to get to a very simple story.
11:44:36 PM Brad Mate: i think the story was a little lacking. even with teh plot holes just the whole box thing is played. and we are seeing it more than once in this fest
11:45:06 PM Ben Sliker: how did she know about the box in the first place?
11:45:17 PM Ben Sliker: cause all she went to that other guy for was the key.
11:45:42 PM Brad Mate: yeah, and if it wasnt her first time doing it who took the key back?
11:46:47 PM Brad Mate: and the bartender seems to knwo about the box...so why is he suprised when she comes back with a clean slate
11:47:02 PM Ben Sliker: you are making my brain hurt.
11:47:10 PM Ben Sliker: with your LOGIC.
Just grazed over the comments that have been made so far, so I apologize if I'm "the repeater" on anything. We really felt like we needed to know just a LITTLE bit more or a LITTLE bit less about the box for us to not have a bunch of questions in the end. But, of course, that's the paradox when you have a short that's about manipulating time. The repeated black spaces always says "trailer" to me, and is an editing decision i rarely make. You really made the most of some beautiful locations and set a high production value for yourself. Like we said in the session, it was nice to be able to watch a film and not have to make too many technical notes. (Which is probably why we came up with so many story questions.) I really can't believe that this is your first effort, I have a feeling you are going to be a force to be reckoned with in future fests (if not this one!) Cheers! :beer:
King Cole
Active member
Well shot, decently acted, well edited (except maybe minus the long black, but my film has chunks of black too), nice soundtrack. Overall a pleasant short to watch that looks very high quality. The story is a bit weak for me- lots of holes I can find. If you match everything else to a stronger plot you'll have one hell of a movie. Thanks for sharing with us.
JC
JC
gabrielflorit
Well-known member
Thanks everyone for the comments! I promise to reply and finish commenting all the films in the next two days. I've been crazy busy moving - from Anchorage to Boston. Tomorrow and Tuesday I'll watch the rest of the entries.
Danielleus
Well-known member
Hey man,
Just caught the flick. I really enjoyed this one. It looked great. The outdoor stuff and the cabin was really really nice. The bar is also very nice as well. A very good look you have there.
I thought the acting was quite good as well. Parts of the way the pharmacist acted wasn't my cup of tea but overall very nice work. Good cameo too, btw the way.
I really also liked the way the story was unfolding. The cuts to black seemed a bit much and there was one near the end that seemed a bit longer than the others, but I though the story itself was getting well underway. I was really sucked in.
Unfortunately I felt that this was like 2/3 of a whole story. I wanted to see what the ending was and where it was all leading and I don't think it satisfied me. It just seemed to end a little abruptly. Is there a longer piece or did you want it to only be that long?
Otherwise I really liked this piece and thought you did a great job. THanks for sharing and I'm looking forward to your other pieces as well.
Just caught the flick. I really enjoyed this one. It looked great. The outdoor stuff and the cabin was really really nice. The bar is also very nice as well. A very good look you have there.
I thought the acting was quite good as well. Parts of the way the pharmacist acted wasn't my cup of tea but overall very nice work. Good cameo too, btw the way.
I really also liked the way the story was unfolding. The cuts to black seemed a bit much and there was one near the end that seemed a bit longer than the others, but I though the story itself was getting well underway. I was really sucked in.
Unfortunately I felt that this was like 2/3 of a whole story. I wanted to see what the ending was and where it was all leading and I don't think it satisfied me. It just seemed to end a little abruptly. Is there a longer piece or did you want it to only be that long?
Otherwise I really liked this piece and thought you did a great job. THanks for sharing and I'm looking forward to your other pieces as well.