NEW SHORT - You Die So Beautifully

Love the sound design and the music. But I didn't like the vignette or the color grading. And the quick cuts, flashing images technique is overused here. It actually hinders me from understand what the story is because a)the images flash by too quickly and b)I'm distracted trying to figure them out. The police woman's acting wasn't the strongest, and I didn't get what happened at the end.
 
Yeah, i can see that. Thanks for your input. This is actually just the first half of the film (i haven't had time to edit the rest. There is a big dialog scene and plot twist at the end), but the "dead" woman isn't really dead, stands up and cocks a gun she has... the police woman hears it, stops and looks up and then i cut to leave suspense.
 
Cool style. Although I like lots of quick cuts, gotta agree. At the end it was a bit frustrating. When it got to the photographs it was too much and then afterwards it wouldn't stop.

Very nicely done though. Simple, not much happened, but I enjoyed it. A bit predictable though.

I love the sound design. Especially at the beginning, hearing the car keys and the walking. Beautiful sound. And even though it's overdone, the sound design with the flashes were very well done.
 
Thanks guys...

I'm entering this into a "super short" category in an editing competition at a local film festival... I appreciate your comments and will try to cut back on my next film :)
 
The dialogues could have been more upfront, maybe the distance of the mic was far, maybe it's the style. There were lots of room making the viewer feel scared and tensed.

Good job with the SFX, a little more on the punchy side. First sequence of the hallway, add more reverb to the footsteps. Footsteps sounded too close and dead in the given location. Bring in some of your SFX closer to pan center, it was very wide. Reason to bring in closer to center or about 45/45 because your atmospheric buildups/mood changes of the underscore is more dead center making a hole between the areas of 25-75 degree.

The music had much suspense. Music cue right on!

Visually stunning! Tone and color a little hot, but overal neutral.
 
Thanks a bunch Chang! I really appreciate it! I'll see if i can go back through and tweak some audio before the festival. I barely used any audio from actual filming... i think i used the metal echo from the door lock hitting the floor, and when she pulls the picture from the clothespin... i think those are the only two practical sound effects. Everything else was added. I'll definitely boost the reverb on the footsteps :)
 
I thought it was pretty good. You can see the end coming early though due to all the warnings you hand out. The opening quote and the "Don't touch her! She's dead." kind of let the cat out of the bag.

Very well put together though. It was still pretty intense to watch.
Sounded great as well.

Cheers!

Mike
 
Thanks guys! Yeah, to be honest, she looked different every day i saw her... kinda weird. I think it's cuz she dressed so drastically different each day. Anyhow, thanks for the response guys!
 
What did you use for sounds effects on the flash-backs, etc? it sounded pretty cool! Did you make those sounds yourself? or get them from some sort of library? All in all, I thought it was really well done, although the vignetting may have been a little distracting at times...
 
Thanks! Some are from random online libraries, and others are from random everyday things i changed. Just in the part where the pictures fly by there are 24 layers of audio there. So i'll name just a few for that shot in particular:

-Water running backwards
-Camera flash warmup
-20 or 30 various SLR camera "clicks"
-Ocean waves sped way up and played in reverse for what sounds like pictures being flipped through
-Altered radio static

Those are a few used in it, basically i just keep altering sounds until it sounds the way i want it. Nothing in real life sounds near as cool as it should in the movies... haha
 
How did you make her eyes move, but her lips so still, it almost looked like a still image.

Is that what it was? Or just really still lips form the actress? Or freezing?
 
The first 2 seconds are a still frame and the last part is video. I just went over it with her a couple times with exactly what i wanted and she did it :)

Thanks Chang :)
 
haha! Yeah, alex if i have time i will edit the rest. There are so cool shots and i changed one thing about the script that i think you would be surprised about ;) (if i can ever get it done that is...)
 
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